Why is divorce so high in the church?

The rate of divorce in the church is directly proportional to the rate of sin and carnality allowed by the church.

If 90% of the conversions in the country were actually real... and the church got serious about not being just like the world, or concerned about offending the world... the divorce rate, teen pregnancy rate, substance abuse rate, etc in the church would decline.

I agree w/ Paul Washer... less than 10% of the peopple in this country who claim to be saved actually are.

Or put it another way... if we made a whip and drove out all the posers (those who say they are saved but are not) then there would be virtually no divorce, etc. (before I get flamed, I am not saying divorce never happens to a truly saved person... I know it does)

The problem is the term "church". When people refer to the term "church" they are referring to organized institution. I believe in the true "Church" (capital "C") meaning the truly saved Body of Christ divorce is NOT rampant.

For those truly saved folks who have experienced divorce I absolutely feel sympathy for your pain. Divorce can and does happen to some who are saved. But the rampant divorce rate generally spoken of in the "church" is a different beast entirely and feeds on sin and carnality.

Krispy

The church has a reputation of being alive, but the church is dead

What about the men and women who are hazarding their lives around the globe for the name of Jesus, are they too apart of the Church that is dead?

What about the promise of Jesus when He said, Matthew 16:18 ?

Jesus and the Church are one body. For anyone to say that the "church is dead", that means that Christ is dead as well because God made it like that on Calvary and in the resurrection. We died with and we arose with Him, we in Him are one new man, a new creation.

I used to say the same thing about the Church until I realized one thing. I didn't love the Church as much as I should have AND I didn't know what I was talking about. I was just repeating what others have said. Jesus loves His body and He cherishes it.

As to the topic of this thread: Paul said, Be not conformed to this world but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind....."

The problems with us at least the Western countries is that we are too consumed in this culture. Men and Women are not taking their proper rolls. Men won't take the lead and Women have to do all the leading. It's a very complex situation. There needs to be a destruction of the current system to bring everyone down to ground zero sort of speak and start over. Whenever Women try to usurp the authority of the man, man gives way to it, men become wimps which produces homosexuals. At the turn of the last century this was beginning to develop. It's not the place for the woman to do what a man does. But this whole problem is man's fault, he allowed the problem to come in. Women need to be ruled over. Oh I can hear the grinding of teeth, but it's true. God is the head of Christ, Christ is the head of man, and man is the head of woman. Cherish her, love her and be kind to her.

A can of worms has just been opened.
:-P

If a husband truly loves God and has a fear of the Lord in his heart and wife does also-nothing that can destroy that marriage.Of course the problems will come but if both love God with all their hearts and fear Him the marriage will withstand any storm.

This marriage might work. This marriage probably should have ended long ago but two people are willing to stick it out through thick and thin, even though he stepped out on her twice. How many women would put up with that? Not too many.

elected wrote: I will better chose to be the most miserable man in marriage then dishoner God by divorce.

The church has a reputation of being alive, but the church is dead

No it is not! The group of people mascarading as the "church" are in fact not the TRUE church!

The true Church of Jesus stands tall and alive... and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it.

Krispy

[b]Elected wrote[/b]

[b] I will better chose to be the most miserable man in marriage then dishoner God by divorce.

[b]Deepthinker responded:[/b]

[b]He/she must not be married!! :-P

Walter responds to Deepthinker:

Marriage between a man and woman is a Covenant Relationship, not a Contract relationship.

The Marriage Blood Covenant

For He Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you”-Hebrews 13:5

That they all may be one; as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be one in us: that the world may believe that thou hast sent me -John 17:21

[color=990000][b]Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
-Ephesians 5:25-33

Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement. (1 Peter 3:1-7)

One of the most important binding forces of marriage, and in turn, a very potent “glue” that holds a marriage together is covenant. Most people today, including ministers and Christian leaders, do not understand the deep spiritual meaning of covenant relationships either with God, or with a spouse. I believe that over the last 150 years in general, and over the last 50 years specifically, there has been a significant exchange of fundamental values in western society, that has also permeated the Church. We have exchanged our understanding of marriage as that of COVENANT for CONRACT, and totally devalued and defiled the marriage relationship established by God for us.

A blood covenant is the closest, most sacred, most enduring, binding agreement known to man. Jonathan and David made such a covenant with each other as recorded in 1 Samuel 18:1-4. When a covenant was made, it was virtually never broken. It was such a sacred commitment that a man would die before he would dishonor himself by breaking a covenant. In the east, a man’s word in a vow or league or covenant was more valuable than his life.

This type of covenant still exists in oriental middle eastern cultures today. To them a covenant is irrevocable, and breakable only by death. Covenant breaking in the east is virtually always punishable by death.

It is astounding that our God, the creator, would make covenant with man, committing all He is and all He has to us. Jesus Christ took upon Himself the punishment for our covenant breaking in His establishment of the New Covenant and offered to all who will receive an irrevocable covenant commitment.

The biblical concept of marriage is that of a blood covenant.[/color][/b] Blood covenant is an eastern concept which has been known and practiced for many centuries in the east, but is little known and understood in the west. The Bible, God's Word, was written in an eastern context and much of the biblical presentation of God's relationship with man is couched in blood covenant terminology. Unfortunately, most of us in the west have very little, if any, familiarity with even the concept of the blood covenant.

The concept of covenant then is a commitment made to another party in the presence of God and other witnesses and is irrevocable. A covenant was not simply broken, and if it ever was, the penalty was death. A contract, on the other hand is a bilateral agreement between two parties totally dependent upon performance of the agreement. Under a contract, if one fails to perform according to the contract, the other party has no obligation to perform either and is no longer bound by terms of the contract. This is not the case under a covenant, which is irrevocable. A covenant was not simply broken, and if it ever was, the penalty was death.

Up until recent years, the concept of marriage, even in society at large, has been that of covenant, not contract. Until recent years, the church has always viewed marriage as a covenant rather than a contract.

Unfortunately, over a period of time, the unbelieving world, out of an alleged concern for the individual, began to forsake the biblical value of covenant in marriage and instead embraced the value of contract. Much of the church, that claims we are a covenant people, rather than being the salt and light that it ought to be, has allowed the world to influence it and has ultimately embraced the worldly values system. In doing this we have participated in releasing a massive destructive force in society and within the church which is ravaging our marriages and families.[color=990000][b] The covenant value in marriage would say to the marriage partner, "I am irrevocably committed to you until death separates us. My commitment to you has nothing to do with your performance or any choice you make. It is a unilateral commitment before God unto death." This is the commitment that the Lord Jesus Christ made to us, His Bride. "I will never leave you or forsake you," Hebrews 13:5[/color][/b]

The contract value would rather say, "I'll keep my end of the bargain if you keep yours. If you make me unhappy or don't do what you promised, then I will leave you (divorce you) and find someone else who makes me happy and keeps his/her promises. And if you leave me, then I will definitely leave you and find someone else. This is contrary to Paul's teaching in Romans 7:2 "For the woman who has a husband is bound by law to her husband as long as he lives.....".

[color=990000][b]I am personally glad that my relationship with Jesus Christ is a covenant commitment on His part rather than a contract commitment![/color][/b]

Whether they realize it or not, parents hold in their hands a powerful key to the future lives of their children. Parents are the primary agents through whom impartation of image comes to children, either from God, who said: "what God has joined together, let no man separate," (Matthew 19:6) or from Satan who as a thief comes "to steal, to kill and to destroy," (John 10:10). Thus, parents may be used either as an agent of God to bless their children, or as an agent of Satan to curse their children.

However, through the Lord Jesus Christ, who has come to this earth to restore life and marriage and our children and everything that Satan has stolen, we can enjoy the blessings promised to us and rebuke the curses of the kingdom of darkness. John said: "He who sins is of the devil, and the devil has sinned from the beginning. For this purpose the Son of God was manifested that He might destroy the works of the devil," (1 John 3:8). I strongly believe that separation, divorce, breaking of the home, selfishness and unforgiveness is a manifested work of the devil.

Covenant breaking through divorce and remarriage, though frequently promoted in the church, are not options for those to whom Jesus is Lord, and who have chosen to live for Him and His kingdom rather than for self and personal happiness.

[b]The primary issue in covenant breaking is the destruction of the image and defamation of the character of God in the sight of others. This gives rise to a deep seated distrust toward God and fear of abandonment in the hearts of the participants, children and those with whom we try to be a witness. We as believers cannot live only unto ourselves. Jesus' concern is not only for believers (John 17:22-23) but even more so for others before whom the church is a representation of the image of God. No one individual is the representation of the Image of God, but rather it is the collective relationship between believers that bear the image of God. When the church is not one, it is difficult to convince people that the Father loves them and that He sent Jesus Christ.

In the same way as the church bears the image of God, so does marriage. Marriage is God's idea. It is an institution of God. Paul tells us in Ephesians 5 that the marriage relationship is an earthly picture of the relationship between Christ and the Church. When there is a Covenant Keeping within a marriage, the image of Christ and His bride is correctly presented before the world. However, when there is a Covenant Breaking within a marriage, the world is presented with the wrong earthly picture of Christ and His bride.[/b]

Because marriage does indeed bear the Image of God in the world, both DIVORCE and REMARRIAGE are bold statements to all those around that the Father does not love them and that the Father did not send Jesus.

Many Christian leaders and pastors continue to remarry divorced Christians to people other than their spouses, thus embracing the world's value of contract rather than upholding God's value of covenant. I realize that, in part, today the church is deceived and that the concept of right and wrong is not particularly strong in our society anymore, even among Christians. However, just the fact that this practice is morally wrong and violates God's will and purpose and it is contrary to the Holy Scriptures ought to be
enough to cause Christian leaders and pastors to discontinue this practice.

God has established the marriage covenant and God never abandons His covenant relationships. All the provisions and promises associated with covenants are ours forever. Therefore, the marriage covenant is based, not on a covenant of works composed of what the couple promises to do for the other, but, on better promises—what God will do in them for each other and all who obey and stand firm on that covenant.

God's word concerning Covenant Marriages:

Genesis 2:18-25: And the Lord God said, "It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.'' Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air, and brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. And whatever Adam called each living creature, that was its name. So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him. And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said: "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.'' Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.

DEUTERONOMY 23:21: "When you make a vow to the Lord your God, you shall not delay to pay it; for the Lord your God will surely require it of you, and it would be sin to you."

PROVERBS 2:17: "who forsakes the companion of her youth, and forgets the covenant of her God."

ECCLESIASTES 5:3: " For a dream comes through much activity, and a fool's voice is known by his many words"

JEREMIAH 3:1: ""They say, `If a man divorces his wife, and she goes from him and becomes another man's, may he return to her again?' Would not that land be greatly polluted? But you have played the harlot with many lovers; yet return to Me,'' says the Lord."

JEREMIAH 32:38-39: "`They shall be My people, and I will be their God; then I will give them one heart and one way, that they may fear Me forever, for the good of them and their children after them."

MALACHI 2:13-16: "And this is the second thing you do: you cover the altar of the Lord with tears, with weeping and crying; so He does not regard the offering anymore, nor receive it with good will from your hands. Yet you say, "For what reason?'' because the Lord has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, with whom you have dealt treacherously; yet she is your companion and your wife by COVENANT. But did He not make them one, having a remnant of the Spirit? And why one? He seeks godly offspring. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth.
"For the Lord God of Israel says that He hates divorce, for it covers one's garment with violence,'' says the Lord of hosts. "Therefore take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously.''

MATTHEW 5:32-32: ""Furthermore it has been said, `Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.'
"But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery."

MATTHEW 19:4-9: "And He answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning `made them male and female,' "and said, `For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'? "So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.''
They said to Him, "Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?''
He said to them, "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. "And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.''

ROMANS 7:2-3: "For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband. So then if, while her husband lives, she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she has married another man."

1 Corinthians 7:39-40: "A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.
But she is happier if she remains as she is, according to my judgment and I think I also have the Spirit of God."

The married state is supposed to be one of perpetual and unconditional love. The phrase "I love you" means this: "I am committed to you. Whether or not you are happy with what I say or do, I care for you and look for opportunities to show you how much I care. I will never leave you, nor forsake you. I will always pray for God's best for our lives together. As husband and wife, we are a one-flesh union and inseparable. No matter what you may do or say, I am committed to you for the duration of our earthly lives. What was once mine is now ours; and I receive what was once yours as ours together.”

"Marriage is a three way covenant- the Bride, the Groom and God". As it says is Ecclesiastes 4:12: ".... a threefold cord is not quickly broken."

Also, lest we forget- "there is no remission without the shedding of blood" - Hebrews 9:22