Friendship
True friendship allows frankness, understanding, and the privilege of comfortable silence.
Friend! What a precious word. Most of us concur wholeheartedly with William Shakespeare who said: Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried, Grapple them to thy soul with hoops of steel. One of the privileges of friendship is being able to speak frankly. Little by little, and day by day, we become accustomed to saying what we think we ought to say instead of what we really think. How comfortable and how pleasant it is to speak freely without having to be on guard. As the Arabian says, "A friend is one to whom we may pour out the contents of our hearts, chaff and grain together, knowing that the gentlest of hands will sift it, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away!" Another privilege of friendship is that of being understood. Perhaps it was this quality which caused George Eliot to write: "Animals are such agreeable friends. They ask no questions; they pass no criticisms." Understanding is to be expected of friends. Total agreement and acceptance? Not necessarily! As one anonymous writer has said, "The strength and sweetness of friendship depends on sincerity tempered by sympathy." A third privilege of friendship is the privilege of silence. If one is but a mere acquaintance we feel that we must talk. So we turn to such exciting subjects as the weather, our ailments, and our latest surgery. But what a joy it is to have a friend that will even understand your silence and not say, "My friend is not my friend anymore because he is not talking." Friends have mutual interests. They enjoy doing the same kinds of things, and talking about their shared interests. That's why there is such great camaraderie between fishermen, woodworkers, gardeners, authors, etc. Friends are mutually devoted to each other. When you are in trouble, it is not merely your friend's duty but his privilege to stand by. If he is in trouble, you count it a privilege to help. Friendship is this... and a whole lot more. But it causes one to ask, "Are God and I friends?" Does Anybody Ask About Your Arthritis? Mamie made frequent trips to the branch post office. One day she confronted a long line of people who were waiting for service from the postal clerks. Mamie only needed stamps, so a helpful observer asked, "Why don't you use the stamp machine? You can get all the stamps you need and you won't have to wait in line." Mamie said, "I know, but the machine can't ask me about my arthritis." We live in a world that has become extremely impersonal. You can take care of numerous business transactions without dealing directly with people. When you do talk with people, most of them aren't going to ask you about your arthritis. They want you to state your business and get out of the way for the next customer. We can get our lunch from a machine if we choose to. We can take our own blood pressure at the drug store. It's been a long time since many of us have had a conversation with a real, live telephone operator. When you live in that kind of context, it's hard to find anybody who is the least bit curious about your arthritis, your gout, your bad cough or anything else that ails you. People still need human contact. Solitary confinement is still the most severe punishment that a prisoner can receive. As Christians we need to be sensitive to the need that people have to be touched and cared for. "For none of us lives to himself alone and none of us dies to himself alone" (Romans 14:7).