The sermon emphasizes the importance of respectful communication and enduring love in marriage, drawing on personal anecdotes and biblical examples.
This sermon emphasizes the importance of how we speak to and treat our spouses, highlighting the impact it has on our credibility as preachers and the lasting damage unkind words can cause. It draws lessons from the story of Abraham and Sarah, showcasing their love and respect for each other even in old age, as a model for marital relationships and the beauty of walking with God.
Full Transcript
One of the great names in our country as a preacher, I had some people that had come to God through my ministry that left their work to go and work for him, to serve God in this man's ministry, he's such an impact. And one day I said to them, as I visited them after a few years, it's a great privilege God's given you to be with this man. And there was silence, and he said, it's not a privilege, Keith.
Do you know why? The way he speaks to his wife. No one, no one that works for him can tolerate sitting under his messages. You can't listen to him preach when you hear how he speaks to his wife.
You can be a preacher, and people who hear the way you speak to your wife will never be able to listen to you preach again. One conversation between you and your wife in the poop that just once will destroy your right to ever preach again. Preacher, you're as real as you are in your home, sir.
Lady, don't doubt that. Don't doubt it. I have an uncle, Roy.
We named our second child after him, and I joked with my wife after about two years of marriage, I actually joked. My jokes were never good, by the way. I was told that very, very emphatically from I won't tell you who.
But I remember joking with my wife, and it was just a joke. My uncle Roy stood up and he began to weep. Within a few seconds, the tears walked over.
He said, Don't you ever speak to Jenny like that again, boy. Don't you ever speak to your wife like that again, Keith. And I stood up and I started weeping for a few seconds because Uncle Roy just didn't weep.
And I said, Uncle Roy, it was a joke. I was joking. Is it wrong to joke? He said, My boy, even in a joke, you don't speak disrespectfully to your wife, Keith.
You and Jenny have something so unique and beautiful. I will not allow you to lose it. I will not allow you, my boy, to lose it.
You will never speak to Jenny like that again, not even in a joke. You respect her, boy. I said to my Uncle Roy, Uncle Roy, I accept that from God, and I never, ever, ever even joked disrespectfully in words to my wife Again, guard your words, Keith.
Once you've said unkind words, you can't undo the damage. And the tenderness is gone. It's almost impossible to get back that tenderness.
Guard your words, boy. I love Abraham, you know. You know what I like about Abraham? Oh, you can say what your wonderful thing of Abraham is.
My father-in-law's favorite topic in sermons is Abraham. I've heard about a hundred sermons on Abraham from my daddy, my father-in-law. But one of the things I like about Abraham is that he sported with his wife.
Do you like that? A lot of people don't like to hear such a word, Abraham. What I like about Abraham sporting with Sarah, you know, he was old when he was doing that. Did you know that? The old king was looking out, this big old fellow looking out the window, and he said, That's not her, brother.
No brother would sport like that. That was the end of him. But I loved Abraham for that.
I thought, wow, you know, he wasn't young, by the way. You look at how he was old, wasn't he, when he had babies and children that he was old. He was still sporting with his dear souls.
He must have been very beautiful, I think. I look at some of you people here and wonder, How is it possible you don't have a wrinkle in your face when I realize your age? There's something wonderful about walking with God, you know. And Sarah was the one example God gave of what a wife should be.
No wonder she kept her beauty. Something so beautiful about her, but oh, he loved her. He was sporting with her in his old age.
And I like that. I don't think it's spiritual to say things like that. It shouldn't be spoken of or talked of, you know.
I was staying in Ohio. Better be careful now. And I was preaching, and they put me in the home of this dear old soul.
I mean, they're old. They were really old. They should have been in frail care home, but they had their own home, and they were happy, and they put me in this home with these dear folk.
And I hope they're not here tonight, or then I'm in trouble. I don't know what I'll do here tonight if you're here. Don't tell me, please.
Just spare me. But my word, I soon sensed these two loved each other. They had been married and so many children, all grown up in the grandchildren.
But the tenderness and the gentleness and the genuine respect in every word he said to her and every word she said to him, there was no soul, there was this love. It was just amazing. I just sat there bewildered at times that there was such genuine tenderness and love in every word and warmth and the gentleness, the thrill in his eyes when she walked in the room, you know, he got excited.
I dared to come down ten minutes early one night. They used to take me to the church where I was preaching here in Ohio, and so I was supposed to come down at a certain time. I was supposed to be preparing at the last minute, preparing how to preach.
I came down the stairs ten minutes early. I should never have done that. And this dear old soul, he was standing there with his wife, but you know, they were kissing.
Now, forgive me to say this. I've never seen young people kiss like that. You might be shocked.
I was shocked. Now, how was I to get out of this? I was at the bottom of the steps, and I looked, and I thought, should I get up the steps, you know, and I thought they might creep, so I stood there, and I tried to shut my eyes, you know. I was so... But I peeped every now and again, scared to breathe.
Well, eventually they knew I was there, and there was a lot of giggling and... amazing. I won't tell you how old these people... You won't believe how old they are. They're in love.
But you know what I prayed? I found myself praying, God, please, let me love my wife like this when we're old. When did love leave the door, Sarah? Does old age demand you stop loving? She feels beautiful. She gets you all thrilled when she walks in the door.
Did God not want you? And the way Sarah submitted herself to him with such love. This man loved her into his old age. It was nothing because of the way she obeyed God.
She became the example of...
Sermon Outline
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I
- The importance of how we speak to our spouses
- The impact of our words on our ministry
- Realness in the home reflects in public life
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II
- Respecting our spouses in all forms of communication
- The lasting damage of unkind words
- The significance of tenderness in marriage
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III
- Biblical examples of love and respect in marriage
- The beauty of aging together in love
- Maintaining affection and tenderness in long-term relationships
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IV
- The role of humor in marriage
- Guarding our words even in jest
- Learning from others' examples of love
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V
- The joy of seeing love in older couples
- Praying for enduring love
- The spiritual aspect of marital relationships
Key Quotes
“You can be a preacher, and people who hear the way you speak to your wife will never be able to listen to you preach again.” — Keith Daniel
“Once you've said unkind words, you can't undo the damage.” — Keith Daniel
“I found myself praying, God, please, let me love my wife like this when we're old.” — Keith Daniel
Application Points
- Always speak to your spouse with respect, even in jest.
- Cultivate tenderness and affection in your marriage as you age together.
- Learn from the examples of older couples who demonstrate lasting love.
