Selfish Conversation
Effective listening is a vital part of conversation, and religion can help us cultivate this important grace.
Mary Wilder Tileston emphasizes the importance of not only speaking kind words but also listening with grace and attention. She highlights the different ways people may struggle with truly listening, such as being distracted, interrupting, or making conversations about themselves. Tileston encourages bringing these challenges under the sweet influences of religion to cultivate a heart of kindness and genuine listening.
Text
Thou shalt speak all these words unto them; but they will not hearken to thee.
--JEREMIAH 7:27
HIS eyes were bright with intelligence and trained powers of observation; and they were beautiful with kindliness, and with the well-bred habit of giving com.plete attention to other people and their affairs when he talked with them.
--JULIANA H. EWING
There is a grace of kind listening, as well as a grace of kind speaking. Some men listen with an abstracted air, which shows that their thoughts are elsewhere. Or they seem to listen, but by wide an.swers and irrelevant questions show that they have been occupied with their own thoughts, as being more interesting, at least in their own estimation, than what you have been saying. Some interrupt, and will not hear you to the end. Some hear you to the end, and then forthwith begin to talk to you about a similar experience which has befallen themselves, making your case only an illustration of their own. Some, meaning to be kind, listen with such a determined, lively, violent attention, that you are at once made uncomfortable, and the charm of conversation is at an end. Many persons, whose manners will stand the test of speaking, break down under the trial of listen.ing. But all these things should be brought under the sweet influences of religion.
--FREDERICK WM. FABER
Sermon Outline
- The Importance of Listening
- Types of Poor Listeners
- The Role of Religion in Listening
- Religion can bring sweetness to listening
- Religion can help us overcome listening struggles
- Interrupters and self-centered listeners
Key Quotes
“There is a grace of kind listening, as well as a grace of kind speaking.” — Mary Wilder Tileston
“Many persons, whose manners will stand the test of speaking, break down under the trial of listening.” — Mary Wilder Tileston
Application Points
- We should strive to cultivate a sense of kindness and attention in our listening, just as we do in our speaking.
- Religion can help us overcome our own self-centeredness and distractions, allowing us to listen more effectively.
- Effective listening is essential for building strong relationships and deepening our connections with others.