Marriage： Wilt Thou Not Revive Us Again

Dear Heavenly Father, Lord, we give you tonight, Lord, we pray for our nation, Lord, we pray for the churches. We are in desperate need, Lord, of your presence. Wilt thou not revive us again? Lord, we need your presence in this church. We need your presence in this valley. Lord, will you not revive your people that we may rejoice in you? Lord, I pray that just a strong anointing will go out in this message, Lord, throughout the weeks and months to come that marriages would be restored, Lord, families would be rebuilt, Lord, children would be renewed and restored and quickened and look to the Father once again as the hero and their mothers, the caring, nurturing woman that you've called her to be, Lord. I pray that you would begin to restore what the enemy is breaking down. Lord, revive your people, revive your church. We ask this in Jesus' name. Amen. Well, I've got another message. All these seem to be burdened strongly on my heart. By the way, welcome to West Side Christian Fellowship. My name is Shane Eidelman, and if I don't know any of you, come up and say hello after the service. I'd definitely love to meet you. But, interesting thing this last week, I'm asked to speak at this church right here tomorrow morning. On the dying, dead condition of the church. Will thou not revive us again? And then I'm going into a marriage series, kind of with the same idea. Will thou not revive our marriages again? The marriages, it's alarming. It's an epidemic of the marriages falling apart and spouses walking away, never to return, kids left broken and shattered in the wake of our own selfishness. Now granted, when I talk about this, there are people who are experiencing divorce or separation because of no fault of their own. I mean, let's be honest, this isn't a blanket statement or blanket umbrella that fits every single situation out there. I know that. But for the large majority of marriages, they are shattering at the core. They are falling apart. People are walking away. They're rejecting not only Christ, they're rejecting their spouse, and it's reaching what the church is calling an epidemic. They don't know what to do. Ironically, I was just looking at some statistics from Focus on the Family, you know, the divorce rate, one out of two, you know, 50% in the church, in the world. The divorce rate among Christians, spirit-filled believers who pray together, read their Bible together, in the Word, obey the Word of God, one in 1,500. You go from 50% to one in 1,500 end in divorce that are putting this first, that are in the Word of God, are obeying it. So we've talked about hearing but not obeying and praying together, spirit-filled believers broken, humbled, following after Christ and letting Him be the foundation. That statistic is encouraging. We should look at that one and ask, what's the real problem here? What is really going on here? And we're going to start to, you know, pull apart some of that and unwrap that present, so to speak, as we get into this marriage seminar. And this is really the precursor to that. But as I was studying for the message tomorrow, I was going to do on reviving the church, and I was studying for this one. I was going to do on, you know, setting the stage, the introduction to the marriage seminar to revive the marriage, to really challenge. Let's get to the core of what we're doing. They came together because realizing the church is the bride of Christ. The condition of the church and the condition of marriages are interwoven. Christ many times said, love your wives, husbands, as Christ loved the church. He gave Himself for what? The church. The church is the bride of Christ. He's coming back what? For His church, the marriage supper of the Lamb. There's so many parallels. When you look at the dying, dead condition of the church and the dying, dead condition of marriage, they are together. They are interwoven. And if you look at that, I wrote this down, the church as a whole is sick and is dying spiritually. We've lost our passion for the things of God. We've left our first love. And when the church grows cold, complacent, and cold and complacent, we have a form of godliness, but we deny the power thereof. We play church, but we know nothing of the Spirit-filled life. And that's what we're seeing today. And that's why I chose that topic from obviously the King James, will thou not revive us again? If the Lord does not revive us, if we do not position ourselves for revival and to awake the church, to awake marriages, there is no hope unless the Lord builds the house. Those who labor, labor in vain. Unless Christ is building your house, unless He built the foundation, unless you're looking to Him, you labor in vain. I labor in vain. Unless the church looks to Him to come and redeem, to restore, we are in trouble. And there's nothing wrong with saying that. The Bible is crystal clear on that. And when you talk about will thou not revive us again, if you look up that word revive, it means to quicken or to awaken that which was dead. It's time to awake the sleeping giant known as the blood-bought church of Jesus Christ. That word revival is to quicken, to restore something. There's a couple other definitions, to repair and to recover. So Lord, will you not recover us and restore us and rebuild us and quicken us, make alive which was dead. See, the true Spirit-filled life is that with a passion for the things of God. It's a passion. When you have a, when you're filled with the Spirit of God and the church is on fire for God, there's a passion for Him. Same thing with marriage. There's a passion for our spouses and for wanting to be friends and on the same page and coming together and what the enemy's trying to tear apart. Do you know why He goes after the family? Because that's the foundation of everything. As the family goes, so goes the nation. We're like, oh the nation's in this crisis and the nation says who's going to be our next leader? Look at the foundation that's crumbling. The foundation is the family unit. That is the foundation of the nation. That is, may I submit to you, the foundation of a healthy church is the condition of the family. They are interwoven and a lot of times you can look in the physical realm. When I was dealing with weight loss and a lot of you know this in the medical industry is that hunger, hunger, food for hunger, for food is often a sign of health. If somebody is hungry, they are often healthy. I mean some of these, we see people dying of cancer or you know I had bronchitis and I didn't eat for almost three days and and when we're not, when we're not healthy, we're not hungry. So if there's no hunger for the things of God, you have to wonder where's my spiritual life? Where's my spiritual walk? Because hunger is a direct result of spiritual health. When you hunger for the things of God, when you seek hard after them, he is a reward of those who diligently seek him. That hunger is a sign of spiritual health. So as you look at the dying condition of the church, the dying condition of the family, there is no hunger for the things of God. There's no hunger for a marriage that's built on the foundation of Jesus Christ. So if there's no hunger there, you have to be, I would be concerned and say, am I dying spiritually? And I talk to people all the time, they'll show up for church and they'll be texting and they'll wonder what's for dinner and I gotta do this, but there's no hunger for the things of God. They are dying spiritually, but they come, they feel convicted, they feel challenged and they leave justified. I came to church, I heard something good, I feel good now about myself, but no change takes place and they still are dying on the vine. So that may I submit to you, and I get asked this a lot when I used to do radio interviews and when I wrote One Nation Above God and talking about the direction of our nation, they're like, what's going on with our nation? Start at the foundation, start at the core. The family, the church is dying, it's withering on the vine. That's the direction of the nation. I mean, they look at statistics, men, Christian men are looking at porn just as much as the world. Christians are putting Desperate Housewives and all these shows in the number one, you know, top list of things to view and vampires and the occult and witchcraft. Christian homes are doing that, folks. Christian homes. Don't worry, I'm not going on the entertainment issue again, but that parallels because as we feed our mind the direction of what we're feeding, what we're allowing into our homes, and we wonder why, why is everything falling apart? Oh, I don't know, I never read the Word of God, I don't obey it very often, I go to church now and then, but I feed myself with the things of the world on a continual basis. That's why, may I submit to you as well, that God's Word goes completely opposite to the society that we live in? Completely opposite. Absolutely, the way you treat your spouse, the way you, Morgan just heard a lady I think this week talking about, just had a baby, can't wait to get that baby in child care 12 hours a day so she can go again and pursue her career and her dream and maybe see the baby on the weekends. But that's what we've created. Now again, please don't understand, there's, women can work and there's times and single moms, of course, I understand all that, but for the mindset, I mean, let's just put that baby in child care, let me just build my career, let me get my status, let me get my recognition, men can do it, why can't I do it? And it runs counter-cultural, so anytime you, often when you obey the Word of God, you will not be going the direction of the culture, you'll be going the opposite direction. Why do you do that? Why do you take that from him? Why this? Why that? Why do you do this? Why do you? Everything runs counter-cultural, but that's what God's Word says versus society, so what's happening in marriages, and I've said this before, I can say it again, we've got Hollywood influencing us, not the Holy Spirit, so as marriages are falling apart, that's a direct result of following society's standards, following what society says about marriage. I mean, you can be on your third marriage, your fourth marriage, it's no big deal, have an affair, it's, you know, you need, you know, it's a midlife crisis, it's okay now and then. I mean, there's one, we heard, we actually got back from a marriage seminar today, Mark Driscoll had one in California, me and Morgan just got back, I hopped in the shower and got here, so it was that quick, and I'm praying, Lord, don't have us get a flat tire, don't, I'm in trouble, I don't know what I'm gonna do, so we're coming straight off of that, and they're talking about how they were interviewing the secular psychologists and different things, and it's okay to fantasize about people other than your spouse, of course that's okay, and they were thinking that Christians were weird, because no, let's have affections for the one God gave you, and then only, yes, of course, we struggle, we fight off less of, but let's, but they said, no, that's ridiculous, you should be able to fantasize about people other than your spouse, you guys are so narrow-minded and conservative and fundamental, I mean, the culture is just, and we, but we watch the culture, we want to emulate the culture, we allow the culture to influence us, so we wonder why marriages are falling apart, we wonder why families are disintegrating, and I, and I'm just concerned, not only, it's one thing with divorce and marriages and bickering and fighting and screaming, but look at these little children, they're in the wake of this disaster, little tiny hearts, little tiny lives, don't know how to handle this, what's wrong with mommy and daddy, what happened, I don't understand, so we're not only breaking the marriage, we're breaking our children spiritually, emotionally, relationally, and I, I'm just seeing a sick and dying culture, and it concerns me, it concerns me greatly, and as I was preparing this message, I'm like, golly, Lord, why do you put this on my heart so strongly, to preach repentance and to preach sin, and why can't I just come up once a year and be Joel Stein, now that's a joke, I'm not, I'm not endorsing, I'm just saying, you know, encouraging, just think positive thoughts, you can do it, and you can get through it, and you're more than a conqueror, and you're the head, not the tail, and God's gonna bless you, you know, why all this heavy stuff, you know, what's, man, what's, what's going on here, and it's, I believe he spoke to my heart, but he said, without confrontation, people will not change, the hammer does not go in, the nail does not go into the wood until the hammer confronts it, the olive does not, bless us with olive oil until it is crushed, wine does not come from the grape until they are crushed, the human heart does not break and repent and change until it is crushed and broken, a broken and contrite heart, I will not turn away, so God uses sometimes confrontation to break the hardness of our hearts, and I was, and I was encouraged this week, I met a guy that got actually one of my CDs a year ago from a friend, and he said, this CD on compromise in the church and compromise in my life, he said, Shane, I've got to tell you, when I listened to that, I knew I had to get out of the church I was in, I knew I had to make some serious changes, and it was just good, more of confirmation for me, because I'm like, oh, this is hard to keep delivering these, I mean, just, you know, just about repentance and, and, and brokenness, but that's what I believe the church needs to hear, like never before, because if you're not confronted, you will not change, period, often. Now, the grace of God leads us to repentance, and, and I understand those things too, you know, a lot of people reading John 3 16, for God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, and that love of price and the mercy, and thank God for it, and that breaks people as well, but sometimes God uses hard words to soften the heart, so when you're, when we're being challenged like this, I just encourage you to, to ask Lord, what are you doing, what are you trying to mold and shape, because anytime you mold and shape anything, or conform anything, it's not, it's not a pretty process, there's a hammer out there, sometimes a jackhammer, sometimes chisels, confronting and challenging and chipping away, you've got to remove this, and you've got to remove that, but you come out of there like the refiner's fire, though he slay me, yet will I trust him, I've been, he's, he's put me through the furnace of affliction, I come out stronger, my marriage comes out stronger than ever before, because I was confronted with my sin, I was confronted from, because of my attitude, and I'll probably tell this story again in the marriage seminar, you know, obviously me and Morgan are going to open up a little bit, and talk about some of our own struggles, but this, you know, I just, I want to save it for the marriage seminar, but I think it's relevant for tonight, but some time ago, and she, I've come to find out she did this on purpose, she left open this journal that she was kind of writing, you know, and I kind of walked by and I stumbled upon it, I'm like, reading that, like I married a man who doesn't let me pursue my dreams, and I won't let him do that to our kids, I was like, what the heck is that, I wonder, well who's that poor chump, and I'm reading going, that's me, that's me, I mean, I took what, an hour and a half drive, I was mad, I was hurt, I was, I said, she's right, she's right, but see, I wasn't trying to do those things, she would want it, let's examples, you know, natural makeup, I said, no, we don't have time for that, we'll have to get another tax, it's going to be more taxes, we've got to do everything right, and how about, I want to write a blog once a month, and help, oh now we got to edit that thing, I don't have time to edit it, so you see, you know, I keep quenching these dreams, I keep, no, no, no, no, I don't, so I wasn't going, I'm a dream killer on purpose, I wasn't, absolutely not, but all these ideas, how about this, and how about little Aubrey wants a guitar, a guitar, Hannah Montana, and then Morgan says, oh look at Juliana and the Knowles, and I'm like, oh that's a, that's true, I mean, there's possibilities there, but had I not seen that, and it confronted me, I said, oh my God, I'm sorry, man, I've been making, now she'll say, I want to do this, I said, that's a great idea, let's do it, you want to go back to school, and let's do it, that's a great idea, so now I'm encouraging, right, because I didn't know I was a dream killer, and I'm not going to, you know, but that confronted me, it hurt, it hurt bad, I didn't want to hear that, so I'm just sharing with you, sometimes confrontation is good, but what you do with it is the key, had I got bitter and upset, how dare you, I'm the man of this house, do you know how hard I work, try working all week and going and preaching a message that people do not want to hear, and getting emails of people upset because I confronted certain issues, but that doesn't wash, because as the head of the house taking responsibility, the man often has to submit and say, I was wrong, I did do that, it took, what, a few days, I was mulling over going, oh no, there's no way, I mean, come on, oh my gosh, and I take a drive, and Lord, I'm so mad, I'm hurt, what, am I really that kind of person, yeah, yeah, but not on purpose, you know what I mean, I wasn't setting out to, I'm going to kill her dream, it was just because I wanted to control everything, life is nice, I don't want to do more taxes with this other business, I don't have time to edit blogs, we don't have time to do this, no, you can't pursue that, no, now I watch the kids, you know, a couple nights a week, so she can go out, do things, work, now we're, the marriage is 10 times better because of the confrontation, but it did not feel good, it hurt, and I'm, you know, I'm doing, I'm driving around thinking, what can I go back and confront her on, I'm a tit for tat, but that's what, and that's why I don't think a lot of people understand, is confrontation is good, you open the Word of God, and if it doesn't, oh man, husbands love your wife as Christ loved the church, if that doesn't sit, you know, with you for a while, and think, wow, that is incredibly hard, and Peter says, God won't even hear your prayers, men, if you're not treating your wife correctly with respect, he won't even hear your prayers, you wonder, you think your problems financially are because of this or that, you think, because he's not even answering prayers when you don't treat our wives with respect, and humility, and gentleness, and kindness, have I mastered this? Absolutely not, but I will die trying, I will die trying, and that's what humility is, it's not saying I'm perfectly humble, it's saying I am a prideful man, but by the grace of God, I need to change that, you see the difference? Recognizing pride, none of us will be completely humble before, so that's a little nugget from the marriage seminar, but I think it was important now, because people need to be confronted sometimes, and it doesn't mean to go and confront your spouse tonight, you've got to wait for the right timing, obviously my thing was God ordained, I just stumbled upon it, I'm reading this thing, and she also does drama sometimes with churches, and I'm thinking, that's a good drama, that's gonna be, man, that's role-playing, and look at that guy, what a jerk, and that's me, unbelievable, so just take that for what it's worth, maybe some things need to take place, and confrontations need to take place, but I think men need to be broken, and humbled, and challenged, that's how we're, one way we're going to restore the marriage for sure, now on that note, I'm going to read something very quickly that I read a few weeks ago, but I think it bears repeating, because I'm talking about, I want to talk about, you know, will thou not revive us again, and I want to parallel the church with marriage, if I may, and I'm going to turn to Isaiah 1, you guys remember this probably, but I couldn't get off my heart again, I want to just read, I'm not going to go through the whole thing, I will probably tomorrow morning, but I'm not here, Isaiah 1 verse 2, hear O heavens, and give ear O earth, for the Lord has spoken, I have nourished and brought up children, and they have rebelled against me, the ox knows its owner, and the donkey its master's crib, but Israel does not know her God, my people do not consider me, I put in a few words right there, if you're reading along in the New King James, alas sinful nation of people laden with iniquity, a brood of evildoers, children who are corrupters, they have forsaken the Lord their God, and then God says to what purpose is the multitude of your sacrifices to me, says the Lord, I have had enough of burnt offerings and rams, and the fat of fed cattle, I do not delight in the bulls, and goats, and the lambs, and the blood of those things, even though those things he used to delight in, those things that were a sweet smelling aroma, those things he called the nation to do, now he's saying I don't even delight in them, remove them far from me, when you come to appear before me, who has required this from your hand, to trample my courts, bring no more futile sacrifices, God's saying, he said bring sacrifice to cover the sins of the people, now he's saying do not bring sacrifice, but before that he says do not bring futile sacrifices, because their heart's not right, this is a people Isaiah said, well they draw nigh unto me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me, so he's saying there in verse 12 again, when you come to appear before me, who has required this from your hand, to trample my courts, bring no more futile sacrifices, incense is an abomination to me, new moons, sabbaths, and the calling of assemblies, I cannot endure any longer, your new moons, your appointed feasts, my soul hates, these are trouble to me, or they are trouble to me, I am weary of bearing them, when you spread out your hands, I will hide my eyes from you, even though you make many prayers, I will not hear, what do you do when the church is dying, what do you do when God no longer hears your prayers, wilt thou not revive us again, look at what he's saying, what he used to delight in, is now an abomination in his sight, what he once was a sweet smelling aroma, is now a stench in the nostrils of a righteous, holy, pure God, because these people draw nigh to him with their lips, but their hearts are far from him, they bring futile sacrifices, they play church basically, he's saying take away from these things, bring back a broken and contrite heart, what was once a place of worship, God can no longer endure, think about that, what was once a time of worship in the holy of holies, where the presence of God would come and fall upon a people, they would worship him in the temple, now he says, I can no longer endure your assemblies, put them away from me, this is radical, God is saying these feasts and these assemblies, I initiated them, now I hate them, prayers that were answered now are falling on deaf ears, what do you do when God no longer hears and will no longer listen, look at what about marriages, what we used to delight in, is now an abomination, remember when you couldn't get wait to get home, now there's every excuse in the book to do something and not get home, what we used to delight in is now an abomination, what was once a sweet smelling aroma, the marriage is now something, a stench, we don't want anything to do with it, we've fallen out of love, we've left our first love, what was once a place of worship and marriage and strong relationships and a fervent desire for Christ is now fading, the marriage is falling apart, the relationship with Christ is falling apart, what do you do, what do you do, it goes on to say, prayers that were once answered are no longer answered, what do you do in marriage when the prayer life ceases, when there's no passion for the things of God, you're just going through the motions, has anyone been there, has anyone been there, that's a difficult spot to be, but as Isaiah goes on to say, wash yourself, make yourself clean, put away the evil from your doings and before my eyes cease to do evil, he'll go on to say, what does the Lord require of you, oh man, or Micah does, but to live justly, to love mercy, to walk humbly before your God, Isaiah will say later on in chapters 57, he will revive, God will revive the spirit of the arrogant, no, he'll halt the arrogance of the proud, I will revive the spirit of the humble, the meek, the broken, that's why I focus so much on this, because brokenness needs to take place, humility needs to take place, without that nothing happens, again, the nail does not go in the wood until that hammer crushes it, the brokenness, the grapes falling, the wine flowing forth, the olive oil must be crushed and broken, the human heart must be crushed and broken, broken is true, brokenness, we don't know that anymore, we've lost our way, men and women used to fill the altars with tears, tear-stained carpet, used to fill the altars in their chairs, I'm not talking about weirdness, I'm talking about brokenness and full surrender, the surrendered life, wasn't what time will we get out of here, church service is two and a half hours, sermons an hour and a half, I can go back to the Puritans, I can show you an hour and a half long, two hour long sermons, I can take you to Ezra, when he read the book of the law till midday, look at Nehemiah, this manual on leadership, telling the leaders of the house, build the wall, having one hand a trowel to build the wall, and then the other hand a sword to fight for your families, these men were broken, they were humble, they were seeking God, you see that throughout the Bible, those who are truly broken and humble, God rejoices in, He fills them with the spirit, men and women fill with the spirit of God going forward, genuine brokenness is the key to the spirit-filled life, is the key to your marriage, had I got angry and upset when I read that, our marriage would not have went the right direction, because I'm right, I'm prideful on the man of this house, instead of saying, oh shoot, what have I done, I need to repent, and I need to ask for forgiveness, because that is not right, brokenness, you can stop most fights by saying, you know what, I'm sorry, I apologize, I do not want this to go in this direction, I love you too much, you think she's going to come back with, or vice versa, maybe, maybe for a minute, but a gentle word turns away wrath, do you realize that life and death are in the power of the tongue, you can kill your children, emotionally, physically, and spiritually, by what you say, hardness, harshness, critical spirit, breaking little spirits that God gives us to mold, and shape, and develop, and nurture, we can crush them with our words, because words are like fire, they go out, and they devour, or they build up, and they encourage, that's why God even says about his word, is not my word like a hammer, that breaks a rock in pieces, is not my word like a fire, that devours, the power of words, the power of building our spouse up, instead of pulling them down, the power of building our children up, and it's difficult, I know, I get in those moods too, it's not like you come up here, and I'm perfect, and I know the word of God perfectly, and I obey it perfectly, and I'm going to tell you how to do it, I'm saying, no guys, we're all in the same boat, I've just been given the job of steering the boat, but we're all in the same boat, we'll face the same struggles, the same dilemmas, I would submit to you, that the enemy is after my marriage, just as much as yours, if not more so, because he takes me out, he'll take many other people out, maybe not their marriage, but their hope, their dream, what they think of the church, how could Shane, you think I don't carry that weight around, absolutely, but greater is he that is in me, than he that is in the world, the enemy cannot do anything against me, as a follower of Christ, he can influence, he can deceive, he can trick, but if you're banging the word of God, you're worshiping God, you're in the way, you're building yourself up with godly counselors, you're making decisions, you're humble, you're broken, he cannot touch you, Paul would say, I am hard pressed on every side, but I'm not crushed, I'm perplexed, but I'm not in despair, I'm persecuted, but I'm not forsaken, I am struck down, but I'm not destroyed, the apostle Paul went through hell and back, and Jesus, even when he talked to Peter, he said, Peter, I pray for you, why? Because Satan has asked for you, that he may sift you as wheat, we don't know what that means in our culture, but that sifting of wheat is when you would just break the wheat down, and sift it, and get just the good stuff out, and throw the the bad stuff away, he wants to sift you as wheat, Peter, Satan wants to come against you, come against your testimony, you're the pillar, you're one of the pillars in the church, I don't believe in apostolic succession, like the catholic church does, but Peter's not that rock, he is one of the leaders of the church that Christ used, and Satan wanted to go after him, but Jesus, what did he say, Peter, I pray that you have no challenges, I pray that you have no dilemmas, I pray that life is easy, I pray that God's will be fulfilled, I pray that God bless you abundantly, I pray that you'll never get sick, you'll always be healthy, wealthy, and wise, you know what Jesus said, Peter, I pray for thee, that your faith fail thee not, out of everything he could pray for, Peter, I pray that your faith fail thee not, see when all is said and done, you stand on the solid rock of Christ, it's your faith and all you have, the enemy can come after you, but it's faith and faith alone, you've got to build that faith, you've got to nourish that faith, faith does not stand still, folks, it either grows towards Christ, or it withers and dies, depending on whether you're feeding it, or starving it to death, and that's what's happening in our marriage, I have no more faith, people are saying, I have no this, well, God didn't leave you, you left God, and more and more and more we're hearing it, me and Morgan just talked about this on the ride there, how many people are saying, I just want to be happy, I'm getting out of my marriage, I just want to be happy, and she brought up a good point, she said, well, so God wants you to be happy, absolutely, is your spouse happy that you're leaving, no, not at all, so God wants you to be happy, but not your spouse to be happy, well, yeah, I don't know, you know, see, that's where we're going in our culture, I just want to be happy, I'm getting out of this thing, your faith, you will go, you will go through challenges, but you should come out stronger and better, because it's that foundation on which everything, you went through hell and back, you know him as God, your provider, you know him as your shepherd, you know him as your counselor, prince of peace, everlasting father, you know him as your savior, your redeemer, your best, you know him intimately, that's how faith stands trial, it goes through life because of the foundation on which it rests, so you're going to go through things, I'm going to go through things, but it's how you go through what you're going through, what do you lean on, and back to the old testament, God is telling these people, Isaiah, tell this people, I will not hear their prayers anymore, basically what they're doing is now an abomination in my sight, unless they repent, unless they turn to me and return to me, oh backsliding Israel, and I will return to you, God would often say return to me, and I'll return to you, I will revive you, I will restore you, I will recover, I will quicken you, if you return to me, and then now we look at the new testament, and we look at the new testament, what is Jesus Christ saying in revelation, a lot of people are like, oh Shane, I don't know about that book revelation, it gets out there, it's hard to understand, well maybe so, but the first couple chapters, you have to understand Jesus Christ himself is speaking to the churches, he's speaking to the churches throughout Asia Minor, the different areas, Smyrna, Pergamos, Thyatira, he's speaking to all these different reasons, regions, the church is only 50 years old, depending on when you want to date revelation, I date around, no, I don't know, 90, 95 AD, don't come up and debate afterwards, I'm flexible, I'm just guessing here where I would put it, so the church is, you know, when Christ, after he was crucified, rose again, upper room, acts, the spirit fell, the day of Pentecost, thousands were added to the church, now you go, and you might have about, I don't know, 50 years or so, the church is already in a backslidden state 50 years into this, one generation later basically, and Jesus is writing to the churches here, he's saying, go tell the churches, tell the leaders, this is my call to them, and we can look this parallels, not only with marriage, it parallels with the churches today as well, this is a letter to us, and I like what he said to the church in Jesus said, be watchful and strengthen the things which remain that are ready to die, Jesus is telling this church, and he's telling the churches today, be watchful, where are the watchmen anymore, the watchmen, husbands, men, you used to be that watchman of the home, they would put watchmen on the walls of Jerusalem, they would put watchmen out for army, invading armies, husbands, you are supposed to be that watchman in the home, not allowing all kinds of junk, and I don't care, I just want to be happy, and I just want my kids to do whatever they want, choose their own path, I'm not, no, you're to be the watchman, you're to watch for when ungodly things come into the home, as they pull your children away, you should be fasting and praying and watching them, because strengthen the things that remain, because they are about to die, because the enemy goes about as a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour, the enemy, your enemy goes about, Peter said, be sober, be vigilant, be sober, be vigilant, watch the watchman, because your enemy goes about as a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour, I don't like that verse, I do not like that verse, but Jesus always says, be ready, be watchful, be prepared, he goes on and talks about the ten virgins, five weren't ready, and five were, he gives different examples of people not being ready, not being prepared, you know, the talents that were hidden, and the one talent was hidden, and Jesus said, no, you didn't do nothing with it, being prepared and being watchful, so Jesus is telling the church, be watchful, and then strengthen the things which remain, strengthen means, what is exercise a lot of times, when you're strengthening your muscle, you've got to do things that the muscles do not like, that's how people get muscles and muscular, they're putting their body in a state of something it's not used to, basically it's an unfamiliar workload, you're putting an unfamiliar workload on the muscle, and it must respond, it must get bigger, it must get stronger, so it can address that unfamiliar workload the next time, so Jesus in sense of saying, strengthen the things that remain, you have to go, it's going to be hard, it's going to be difficult, it might mean throwing the tv out in the garage for a month, it might mean saying, wife, we're going to have a date night once a week, kids, we're going to pray, and we're going to have devotional, as hard as it is, we're going to try these things, not some legalistic weird family, but a family who's on fire for the things of God, no, it doesn't look good at first, when you try to have a devotional like I do with the six-year-old, and the four-year-old, and the two-year-and-a-half-year-old, it's not pretty, I'm like, Morgan, can you try to find something online that helps me keep these guys, yes, daddy, okay, pay attention, no, no, they're doing all kinds of, now my she's turning seven now, she she'll sit and listen, wants to know, so she has so many questions that are so hard to answer, and you know, because they think a lot differently, and, and, and, but it's hard to do, but I'm going to die trying, we're going to, we're going to, we're going to get better at it, we're going to strengthen the things that remain, Jesus is saying, be watchful, in other words, when you're watchful, you look at what is dying in my family, where am I compromising, where is the enemy coming in, where is the small foxes coming in, they're spoiling the vines, I'm a watchful man, now that I see that, there's some things that here that are good, that remain, but they're falling apart, I need to strengthen those things, I need to challenge those areas in my life that are falling apart, and that's when I strengthen them, and, and, and build them back up, and then Jesus says that basically be watchful, strengthen the things which remain, that are ready to die, for I have not found your works perfect before God, and then he goes in, he addresses the church as Ephesus, I won't take a lot of time here, but he, he tells the church in Ephesus, church in Ephesus, I know your works, I know your labor, I know your patience, I, and I know that you cannot endure those who, who are, who do evil, and you have even tested those who say they apostles, and who are not, and you have found them liars, you have persevered, and have patience, you've labored, nevertheless, I have this one thing against you, you have left your first love, all that basically does not matter, the fire that used to ignite that church, the passion for the things of God, has now turned into dead formality, they're doing, but there's no passion there, have you been that in marriage, the same parallel, we're doing things, we're falling out of love, I hear that often, you can't fall out of love, God ordained love, as love is patient, love is kind, love doesn't envy, it doesn't boast, it's not rude, it's not proud, it's not self-seeking, it keeps no record of wrong done against it, the way God designed it, love doesn't leave you, you leave love, you can't, you can't fall out of love, what's happening is you're falling out of repentance, if I may be honest, we don't fall out of love, we fall out of repentance, we get selfish, we get prideful, we get arrogant, we don't want to repent, we don't want to be broken, we don't want to be humble, so we say, I'm not enjoying you anymore, I'm out falling out of love, and that's what happened to this church, they did all these great things, look at this church, I mean that's a model church, oh my goodness, they pointed out those who didn't have sound doctrine, they were involved in ministry, they could spot evil, they did a lot of things, but Jesus said, repent, return to your first love, or I will become, I will come and remove your lamp stand, that's powerful, and that's, I believe, one hope for our marriages, he's saying, repent and return to your first love, start to remember your spouse, remember when you used to date them and fell in love, what happened to that? Oh, that's old news, well it could be new news again, you have to go back and pursue that, pursue that first love, and pursue the passion that was once there, that's the danger of Ephesus, is complacency, complacency will kill the church, and complacency will kill your marriage, because you know what happens, as sinners, we don't stand in the middle, we drift, we drift, what happens if you jump into a river? You're going to go the direction the river's going, and the culture's just going to pull you complacent, I'm bored, I don't love them anymore, and I'd say nine times out of nine, talking to people who commit adultery, those things are said, I didn't love them anymore, I'm bored, they're not who I fell in love with, we've drifted, we don't see eye to eye anymore, it's probably best now, you see, you hear all that, because complacency, they didn't strengthen the things which remain, and pull themselves back, and undergird and support, you think another relationship, an adulterous affair, is going to bring love, joy, peace, contentment, you'll be walking filled with the Spirit of God, and broken and humble, have tons of peace and joy, absolutely not, as a matter of fact, some of the most confused people I talk to, are those still caught in sexual sin, who have not repented from it, and change, I'm just being honest with you, I'm going to shoot you straight, this seminar, this is one of those you might want to leave little ones at home, because we're going to get down and dirty, and talk about some things that we need to talk about, because without confrontation, we do not change, and it's time to bring the hammer out in love, and say, as I'm saying this to you, guess who's working on me at home, as I'm preparing the sermons, you think it's in one ear and out the next, I mean, just Wednesday, I was almost weeping, just saying, Lord, I need you so much, I need to work on these things, help me, help me, but that's healthy, I don't want to come up here, oh I've mastered this, how could you guys, I can't believe you, I can't believe you, that's unbelievable, because all of us, I mean adultery is one step away, you think I'm up here saying, that'll never happen to me, oh it could, if I get out of relationship with Christ, drift to the world, get out of the word, get complacent, get bored, get focused on everything but the good news of the gospel, and my wife, and start to drift, you don't think it could happen, it's in all of us, that's the nature's in all of us, and nine times out of nine, when I talk to people who have committed adultery, you know what they say, I never thought that could happen to me, I can't believe that happened to me, pride cometh before a fall, oh it can happen, because the good thing is when you know it can happen, you put up the safeguards, you put up the safeguards, you're strengthening the things which remain, you say, this is a possibility in my life, if I don't stay anchored in the word of God, absolutely, I don't want anybody to tell me they can never stumble into certain sins, I mean I know we all have inclinations, somebody struggles with marijuana, somebody struggles with alcohol, somebody struggles with lust, well most men struggle with lust, let's get that out of the way right now, but I talk to guys a lot of times, they'll say, oh I don't struggle with that, really, really, I'd say, can I write a book about it, can I interview, what for, well I've never met a guy who's ever struggled with that, they say, well well I mean now, yeah I guess so, you know they change their story, but first they want to act all holy, and say, oh no not at all, you know, but it's a good thing, God gave us that lust for our spouse, it's a good thing, it's not gross, it's not, oh my, it's good if you point it in the right direction, appetite is fine if you eat the right foods, these things that God has given us are fine if within the context of how He designed it, when you get outside of the way God designed it, you know what word I like to use, perversion, you pervert the truth, that's all perversion is, a twisting of the right path, you pervert that truth, I better get going, I'm never going to get out of here, the church in Pergamos, half of this stuff is not in my notes, my notes are, I'm just, God's just pouring all the sin in my heart, so I'm hoping, I'm hoping we can gain something from this, number two, Pergamos, there's a lack of holiness in this church, there's a lack of holiness, let me read this, this is unbelievable, Pergamos, Jesus is saying, hold fast, oh you held fast to my name, verse 13, and did not deny my faith, even in the days in which Antipas, my faithful martyr, was killed among you, you live where Satan dwells, but I have a few things against you, because you have there those in the church who hold to the doctrine of Balaam, now be careful, because we're going to talk about Thyatira in a minute, he's going to, he's going to rebuke them, because they teach, they teach error, where this church had those who held to error, in other words, they allowed all the sin in the church, basically it's called in my bible, the compromising church, they compromised the word of God, they allowed all the stuff, they didn't confront sin, they didn't confront anything, they allowed this stuff to happen, and Robert Murray McShaney died many, many years ago, he said, a holy man is an awful weapon in the hands of a mighty God, holiness and being set apart in distinction, that is what a strong marriage must be built upon, that's what, if you want a vibrant relationship with the Lord, you can't let all these little compromises into your life, into your heart, compromise here, compromise there, compromise here, and in marriage it comes and destroys marriages, it destroys the church, as this is why Paul can say, come out from among them and be separate, we live in the world, but we're not of the world, there should be a distinction, a separation, but this church and marriages allow whatever, think about that, you go into most homes and what was called pornography 30 years ago is now enjoyed on a nightly basis, don't tell me we're not drifting, don't tell me we're not shifting our morals and our values, I mean you watch these Super Bowl commercials, unbelievable, unbelievable, yet we're in a culture that's inundated, we love it as a church, we love it, this is wonderful, this is great, isn't it, wonderful, we are dying, we are compromising, that's the letter to the church in Pergamos, there's a lack of holiness, Thyatira, there was a lack of sound doctrine, I'm gonna have to go quick or maybe hold it for the next time, Thyatira, this church had a lack of sound doctrine, I won't spend much time here because I love this point, the truth as I said many times before is a heel on which to die, the truth of God's word is a heel on which to die, but obedience to it is the key, right, so in your marriage, in the church, we have to have the truth of God's word, that's the foundation and obedience to it and then we go on to Sardis and they're just going through the motions and have you ever just went through the motions in marriage, here's this person next to me, I can't believe it, I don't like him anymore, they're not my friends, but I guess the old phrase, I love you, I just don't like you, going through the motions, Jesus rebukes these churches, they're just Sardis, they're going through the motions, they're dead, say, oh, you're alive, you have all this, Jesus Christ said, you're dead, you're dying, church, repent and return to me and then he goes on to my favorite church, the Laodiceans, Jesus said, you're either hot or cold, but lukewarm or I will vomit you out of my mouth and that leads me to believe that hot and cold are both good, I've heard both theological, I've heard sermons on this, that this is this, but you think that hot is obviously good because Jesus is saying, being hot or be cold and of course, in that area, they had hot water, hot springs and they had cold water from the cold, but when you mix those, that lukewarm, that tepid, Jesus said, I just vomit you out of my mouth, church, because you're lukewarm, you're wavering between two opinions, how long will you follow after other gods? In our marriage, if you're just double-minded in all your ways, Laodicea, Jesus saying, you're lukewarm in your marriage, I'll take it or leave it, I'm not investing in it, it's the most important relationship you have apart from your relationship with Jesus Christ, if you're not investing in your marriage, your marriage is being taken away brick by brick until the whole house falls down, you wonder what happened, because the enemy comes in in that lukewarmness, see, I've learned something with being a Christian, you can't be a lukewarm Christian, there's no such thing, you're either on fire for the things of God, not perfection, but direction, as I've said before, get that in your mind, because you don't want to leave here thinking perfect, perfect, perfect, but you want to be leaving here with a direction, a clear direction, a heart that's broken and humble to God, and then I put down there in your notes what A.W. Tozer said, God waits to be wanted, God waits to be wanted, church, our spouses wait to be wanted, look at the parallels there, God waits to be wanted, spouses wait to be wanted, when we reject that, God drifts, when we reject the spouse, the marriage drifts, they are parallels in marriage, God ordained the institution of marriage, God ordained the institution of the church, He will revive what He initiated, He initiated, these are His foundational institutions, the church to preach the Word of God, marriage to also preach the Word of God, but to raise children in godly fear and the admonition of the Lord, and they go together, the church, the body of Christ and healthy marriages, and He goes on to say, as many as I love, I rebuke and I chasten, this is for us out here, listen here, Jesus says, I love you, I love you, church, that's why I'm rebuking you, I'm chastising you, because I love you, for as many as I rebuke and I chasten, that's what He goes on to say, behold, I stand at the door and knock, if anyone hears my voice, opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him and him with me, and a lot of people use this as a call to unbelievers, it's not a text for unbelievers, Jesus is not calling unbelievers, saying, I'm knocking your door, He's telling the church, your doors are shut, I'm standing outside, church, let me in, the very church that Christ died for has locked Him out, the church is dying, it's degenerating, wake up, wilt thou not revive us again, Lord, if you do not move in this place, we will not be able to go forward, if you do not move in our marriages, they will fall apart, church, it has to be, it's not falling out of love, it's falling out of repentance, repentance, the humble He teaches His ways, brokenness, true repentance, genuine repentance, and on that note, since I talk about this a lot, we're going to cue up a brief two-minute little clip that a movie that my daughter loves, she's almost seven, she wants to watch this every night and I'm okay with it, but as we were watching, it's not a bad one, don't worry, fireproof, there you go, but as I'm watching it, the Lord just hit me with this, this is what genuine repentance looks like, for those of you who want to know exactly what I'm talking about, you want 43, there's only 40, who says I have to stop, Caleb, I don't know how to process this, this is not normal for you, welcome to the new normal, you didn't want to do this at first, did you, but halfway through, I realized that I did not understand what love was, and once I understood that, I wanted to do it, Caleb, I want to believe that this is real, but I'm not ready to say that I trust you again, I understand that, but whether you ever reach that point or not, I need you to understand something, I am sorry, I have been so selfish, for the past seven years, I have trampled on you with my words and with my actions, I have loved other things when I should have loved you, in the last few weeks, God has given me a love for you that I've never had before, and I have asked him to forgive me, and I am hoping, I am praying that somehow you would be able to forgive me, Catherine, let the rest of my life without you. Caleb, I'm supposed to give those divorce papers to my lawyer next week, I just, I need some time to think. You can have all the time you need. That, folks, is genuine repentance. Notice what he said, I pray that God, God's grace is what did this, God revived him, God can revive our marriages, that is genuine repentance, repentance is not feeling bad, or crying necessarily, I said, wasn't that a good clip? Yeah, great. Repentance is a genuine broken heart, repenting, turning from what was wrong, and now doing what's right, it's a change of mind that leads to a change of actions, that's genuine repentance, and what we're going to do now is Jordan comes up, and Isaac, you can even hit the lights again, we could have left those off, we're going to go into a time of communion, and how we do it here, you don't have to wait for any cues, you know, I'm not going to say take the elements, or take the bread, take the, you're going to come up at your convenience, and you're going to grab the elements, you can go back to your chair, you can come to the altar, you can go back to your spouse, pray with them, but we're going to go into a time of communion, where you take the elements at your leisure, and this is what the Bible talks about, remembering what Christ did on the cross, remembering the bread represents the body, see that without the breaking of the body, the blood can never be shed, you might say, what's the point of the bread? That's the breaking of the body of Christ, being whipped, and beaten, and broken, so the blood came out, without the shedding of blood, there is no remission of sin, so that's what we do at communion, all we do is remember, remember the blood of Christ, remember the broken body, and that should drive us, not only to the foot of the cross, that should drive us to healthy marriages, that should drive us back to repentance, so you guys can go ahead and stand up, we're just going to do a song or two, we're going to go into a time of communion, and then I'll come up and close this, but let me pray right now, dear Heavenly Father, Lord, Lord, I pray that you would continue to quicken hearts tonight, Lord, break the hearts, Lord, the hearts right now that are already right on the verge, Lord, just pour in your grace, pour in your mercy, Lord, pour in the Holy Spirit, the conviction of the Holy Spirit, Lord, let the hound of heaven loose, Lord, in convicting the church, Lord, your blood-bought church, dear Heavenly Father, please revive us, Lord, revive your church, revive Westside, revive the Antelope Valley, we ask this in Jesus' name, amen. One small note, though, communion is for those who consider, know that they're believers in Jesus Christ, they're part of the body of Christ, that's what we're doing, we're coming together, we're remembering Him, so if you don't know Him, there is no better time, you can come up and pray with me, we'll have, Yvette, if you want to be up here, Morgan, we'll have people up here to pray with you, there's no better time than to finally say, Lord, I need you, I'm giving you my heart tonight, take communion with us, or if you need prayer for healing or deliverance in certain areas, your marriage is falling apart, finances, we're here to prayer for you, the church, prayer moves the hand of God, and I've said many times, a prayerless church is a powerless church, the reason we're not seeing marriages restored and lives restored and the church rebuilt is we're not a praying church, we're not a praying people, as much time as I spent up here speaking, we should be spending praying and petitioning God, it's the prayer that moves the hand of God, I'm not moving the hand of God when I speak, let me clarify that, I am not moving the hand of God when I speak, I am speaking forth his word to convict the heart, and then when the heart breaks, then his power can flow into you, and prayer actually moves the hand of God, we're asking him to come and to reign and rule in our lives, to shape us and to redirect us and to restore our marriages, so we're going to go into a time of communion, come up and get the elements and come up and let us pray for you if you need that, thank you.