The Duty of Discipline

The principles of healthy masculinity because masculinity is being attacked right now like never before. I don't know if you've even seen even recent Navy SEAL commercials with transgenders in them or Navy. It's like, give me a break.

Could we stoop any lower? What do you think Russia and China are saying about that? I mean, it's just, it's absolutely unbelievable. And so it is a time, and because of that too, masculinity has been pushed down. Biblical masculinity is very important.

It's men being men, what they've been called to do. And so the duty of discipline is what I want to talk to you about this morning. The duty of discipline, but also let you know we're coming up with a date in August.

Pastor Abraham will probably lead that one. We don't have a date yet for you. And I think in September we'll do it again on a Saturday, either the 14th or the 21st.

I'm not sure yet because we have the father-daughter dance coming up as well. And in September, I might do a no breakfast, men's breakfast. Let's come fasted, let's come hungry for more of God.

Versus the tryptophan kicking in and you're getting tired. Let's tell King's stomach no for a few hours. It's not too difficult.

That'll be coming in September. I know half of you might not be here, but that's okay. That'll actually really show us what we're hungering for, isn't it? So September, we'll keep you posted on that as well.

But the duty of discipline in Proverbs 25, 28 was really the key verse. Whoever has no rule over his own spirit is like a broken down city without walls. And what that means is obviously ruling over our own spirit and a city without walls was under attack.

It was actually the protection was no longer there. It was anybody could come and go as they please. They could rob the place.

They could bring armies in. It was just unguarded. And it's a hard topic because nobody wants to talk about discipline, but it's very important.

And we have been given this incredible ability as believers. Okay, you ready for this? It's gonna be tough to hear right now, especially in the culture we live in. We can say no.

The devil doesn't make us do it. You know the old phrase, right? How many of you are old enough to remember that? Flip Wilson. The devil made me do it.

The devil made me do it. And we can see that sometimes even hyper-Pentecostal churches, they get really into there's a demon under every rock. Man, the devil's attacking my marriage.

No, you're just arrogant. The devil's attacking my finances. No, you just spend and have no budget.

Oh, the devil's really coming. And really, how much of that is our own responsibility? Now, I'm not minimizing the assaults of the enemy. If anybody knows about spiritual warfare, it's pastors, leaders in the church, and men too.

You know, it's intense. But there's something about discipline that is profound because it's actually a fruit of the Spirit. Self-control, controlling self.

And I can tell you this morning that I'm not up here saying I've mastered it. Here's how to do it. I'm here telling you I'm a work in progress just like everyone else, but it can be done because Scripture actually commands it.

The duty of discipline. We actually have a duty, a calling to discipline ourself. Commentary, Benson Commentary said, no rule over his passions and especially his anger.

He exposes himself to unmanifold dangers and mischiefs. Don't you like how these old commentaries would write? And it's interesting, when I looked at Benson, Poole, Henry, Matthew Henry, late 1600s, maybe early 1700s, they all mention anger. And that never really crossed my mind was that when I think of this verse.

To me, I think of self-control, discipline, and turning away from things. But all these commentaries, and it is true actually that anger, he who has no rule over spirit, because anger causes a lot of problems. Anger worketh not the righteousness of God.

And harnessing that anger. But it's tough, isn't it? And I'm not gonna go into a lot of details, but I grew up in an angry home. My dad came from Oklahoma and that's how you did things.

Yelling was how they got things done. He played, he actually played at AV High School. Really good, he got a scholarship in football, All-American.

And he said, son, you just get as angry as possible. You drive through them. You don't do whatever you need, you just, and it's anger, and that's how we got through life.

That's how he would deal with issues. That's how he would deal with issues in the home, in the workplace. I mean, just walking around, you wouldn't think it, but that explosive anger.

And it caused a lot of issues. I'm sure it scarred us young. Men with issues are just young boys who got hurt.

Okay? You can trace it back. Now it's no excuse, but walking on eggshells, right? And anger and seeing volatile situations really do trigger me in a way that it's hard for me to see people being hurt or angry outbursts because of what I remember. Even last night, my wife was gone, she was at a prayer meeting, and we had to put the little five-year-old down for, and she's crying for me, daddy, and I'm like, okay, just come in here.

Okay, I can't handle this, right? It's because I remember even my brother, you know, and crying when we were punished, and just that over-abusiveness, it's hard. And so that triggers me, and it's hard to even punish my kids. As they were growing up, because I remember that, and I would be, you know, kind of the opposite.

You know, I don't want to, and to my detriment, maybe, maybe there's, we did discipline, of course, but not to the degree that we probably should have because of that. I didn't want that to happen in our home. But in my 20s, before I came back to the Lord, that anger was passed on.

Anybody relate? So I said, okay, this is how, so my first, you know, encounter with relationships and angry at the spouse, and really looking back, the fuel for anger is selfishness and pride. I don't want to be challenged. I don't want your opinion.

I don't want that you spent too much money. And we're working, right? And this anger, these angry outbursts. If you've ever got the police called to your home because of angry outbursts.

Punching holes in my wall in my 20s. You have to hang pictures there, right? So people could not see until the drywall guy came over and he had to make an excuse for the drywall guy. And angry, and I don't know, it's hard because you don't know.

Some, of course, demonically inspired. I'll get into it in the book of Acts. Demonized, you know, we don't believe in possession, but is there oppression where you could have, you know, this open door, and anger was just, and it cost me a lot.

And you could just explosive that temper. You know, you guys know it can just flare up and everything's good and then it just flares up. And so in my 20s, that was a real issue for me until I finally, you know, came back to the Lord.

Prodigal son came home and then a lot of that faded away because, you know, when you're walking with the Lord, you're more filled with the Spirit. Things that upset you, you know, you're not gonna get angry anymore. Somebody, you know, now I think of when I couldn't even, I wouldn't even let my wife drive my truck in my 20s.

Now my son threw something in there, he put a magnet, kind of scraped it, and I'm like, okay, let's be careful. But in the past, when I was in 20s, that would have set me off. You can't drive, you can't drive, and all the selfishness.

Now you just go with the flow and you recognize that, you know. But sometimes I feel it, you know, like coming up, but that's what I think it also is talking about. Take rule over your, we can say no, self-control, control self.

And when we feel that rising up, Lord, that's not right. I need to talk this through. You know, even with kids popping off, how many, that can trigger you.

You know, you start to, especially if you have boys, you see them getting older, you start to see now a little man, and he's popping off at you. You don't like guys, you know, challenging you. And that anchor can be, and I realized years ago, I had to say, I've gotta just, you know, let this go, because I can't be like what my dad was.

And so disciplining yourself and feeling that anger, I can't tell you. I also had, in addition to that, I had roid rage. Anybody know what that is? You're injecting a lot of testosterone, and testosterone makes us angry, and so that's what roid rage is.

They're injecting a lot more of the male hormone than they should, and because of that, you're, boy, can you tell the difference? It's like just incredible anger. And then you combine that with roid rage, right? You're on tons of caffeine, and you're in a hurry, and somebody gets in your way, and you got roid rage and roid rage, and it's a bad combination. And I think that's probably why my dad actually died at my age.

A heart attack in Lancaster off the 30th East over by Lancaster Baptist Church, setting trusses with a crane truck. And I had to go pick up the truck that day. I saw his boots there and his clothes and blood and stuff.

But I remember that they even told him, you know, he was a pot of coffee, cigarettes, stress, and the doctors would tell him, you know, that anger is gonna kill you, you know? Anger and things. But of course, we didn't know what that meant back then, but now, of course, I'm not gonna get into details, but with what anger does, increasing the adrenaline, it's very toxic. It's harder on the body and the heart and organs.

Actually, the Bible talks about that, you know, peace and affecting the bones. And it's interesting how the body is designed by God for these very things. And so I didn't have any of that in the notes.

I just thought it was important to really focus on. It does have to do with controlling that anger, minimizing it, and really looking at why do we get angry? Right, and I've talked to many men over the years, a lot, thousands, because I used to speak at men's conferences, and a lot of it has to do with selfishness, my lifestyle, right? If your lifestyle's being challenged, hey, I've got the toy hauler ready. I've got this going, this is exactly what I want to do.

I wanna get my sleep, I wanna do this, I wanna do this. And then your wife throws a monkey wrench into your plans. Well, let me tell you, just get used to that, because that's just... But can you imagine getting up? Can you imagine getting up? I haven't mastered it, I'm working on it, but getting up and saying, Lord, whatever you have for me today, I wanna be humble, I wanna serve you.

What does my family need? What does my spouse need? A lot of changes take place when you put the needs of others first, right? Many of you guys know I have a background in health and fitness, and I could get really crazy with that, you know? 6% body fat, be in great shape, but it would be self, self. Go back to weighing my food, go back to this, can't go here, can't go there, can't go eat, don't go there, I don't want events, I don't want fellowship, right? Self-focused. And if anything comes in on that, I get angry.

So I also dealt with in late 20s. And so we see how important this topic is, because what sets us off? How many of you, do you have a spouse that thinks they're the Holy Spirit sometimes? And I've had to hold my tongue, like you're not the Holy Spirit, right? But you also have to think of it as a blessing, because I'll get texts just like this week, okay, it's my brother-in-law's birthday, it said this person needs this, I'm like holy cow, man, let me do it. Right, but you feel the anger coming up and dealing with that.

So keeping a rule over your spirit has to do with anger, and you can't, by past experience, you can't just try harder. Like I'm gonna try not to get mad, oh God help me, I'm gonna red knock, I'm gonna take a drive. It has to come from within.

It's a position that's actually ready before the anger comes. You know, that's one reason why I leave to things early. It's a nice drive, I'm not in a hurry.

But man, when you're in a hurry, or getting the kids out the door, or traffic, and just these things we can do to protect ourselves, and anger is explosive. It will open yourself up to many dangers and problems. How many marriages are on the brink of divorce because of anger? Right, it's really hard to have a woman leave a marriage that wants to follow the man that loves her and is humble and will lead.

That's a hard one. You don't see them having affairs very often. It's usually because of anger, physical abuse, verbal abuse, anger.

I gotta get away, and man, being strong, they wanna flee that environment where we're like, what's wrong? What's wrong? You got sex, food, and I'm making money. I think this is great. No, no.

So that role that God has given you to lead, if it becomes domineering, and you begin to dominate your family instead of lead your family, it's good for your kids to hear sorry. I should've handled it that way. I did get upset.

Sorry about that. But this verse is so key. Rule over his own spirit.

The Amplified Version, like a city that is broken down and without walls, leaving it unprotected. Men, we are unprotected when we're not disciplined. Isn't that amazing? Now, let me give you an encouraging insert real quick.

We beat ourselves up too much, too. Anybody try to go on a diet or a fast and blow it, and you just beat yourself up the whole week? Or we try to be better, man, he just talked about anger, and I get angry tonight. Oh my gosh, forget it.

Learn from it. Learn from it. Fall forward.

Get back, and you begin to develop discipline. It doesn't happen overnight. It's a process.

And it's got ups and downs and valleys. I mean, there's times, even as a pastor, I'm like, where did that come from? You guys, any of you relate? There's a lot of rabbit trails this morning. I knew you relate.

Any of you go camping? You have your favorite spot? The river, by the lake? That's your spot. You get it every year. So one year, I went and I secured it up in the High Sierras.

I put, from me to Pastor Abram, I put out our four chairs and the poles, and then I went back and got my family. Well, this family did not like that. You can't hold spots like that.

Oh yeah, I can. Well, where's the fishing rules? And so my wife's sitting down. He gets right next to her.

He just casts out right by her. I'm like, oh my, this is not gonna go well. I'm like, dude, what are you doing? We're right here.

And I could tell it was escalating, right? And this is the old shame. I don't want to come back. And man, I was just, my kids were watching.

Like, this is embarrassing. I'm a pastor. So I don't know what happened, but it's kind of walked away.

And then I walked, you know, eventually walked over and said, hey guys, sorry about that. We just, you know, we thought we could hold that. I see your point.

And he goes, oh yeah, no problem. Bottom line, we ended up fishing, like having the whole area together. But man, there had to be a turn.

There had to be a humbling of myself. And I can give other examples. Can't some of you? Where it will not go in a good direction.

A lot of these shootings, you see road rage and things that's real. These people just going off, it's because of anger. And that's why a soft word turns away wrath.

Gentle, soft word, control that anger. Like a city though, broken down. You will be unprotected.

It's like a man who has no self-control and he sets himself up for trouble. I can't pronounce this next commentary, but it's a good one. As such a city can be plundered and laid to waste without trouble, so a man who knows not to hold and check his desires and his affections is in constant danger of blindly following the impulses of his unbridled sensuality and of being hurried forward to outbreaks of passion and thus of bringing unhappiness upon himself.

Isn't that true? What he's talking about there is you feel those unbridled passions. If you go with those, it's gonna be destructive. How many of you talking to men, you know, throughout the day you'll say, this is not a good time for me to go on my phone right now.

Because I can feel if I'm on TikTok, Instagram and the right, wrong picture comes up, you do what you need to do. You have the self-control to do it. You start to open it up and browse through, then you no longer have that self-control.

You've given the enemy a stronghold. You've opened the door for that. That's why self-discipline calls us to say no.

But then thank God, the fruit of that choice is peace and joy and it takes a little while. It takes a little while, but it does kick in. Discipline guards against unhealthy appetites and lusts that always want to go to the extreme and be unbalanced.

Those who are disciplined, those who are not, you can tell there is a difference. And if you ever need these slides, the office can get them to you as well. But discipline guards against unhealthy appetites.

So what it is, it's a regulator. Remember governors on your vehicles? My dad had one on my Chevy Blazer, couldn't go over 65. It governed, it regulated the speed.

And so discipline tells the appetites no. No, I'm not gonna go in that direction. I'm turning from it and then life's going and then you stumble, you fall.

And then you say, you know what? I'm not going in that direction. It's a constant battle. But I'd rather be on the winning side than the losing side.

Because what happens when we give ourselves up to the passion, say oh, forget it, then where does it stop? And when I was studying for that message I did on pornography, I think a couple of years ago, stats I didn't even know of, things I didn't need to know about how more disgusting it's getting and things like that, shows, and it talked about giving, if you're addicted, let's say like gluttony is a sure indication of probably also a porn addiction. Because if you can't say no to the animalistic appetites of the flesh here, you're not gonna say no to the sensuality aspects of it either. So it connected, the discipline was connected in all areas.

If I give into something I know I shouldn't be giving into, it's gonna have ramifications in other areas. How can I be strong in this area but weak in other areas? It's really challenging because self-discipline, the fruit of the Spirit means you're disciplined and because you said no to these things, now you're strong to say no to this. Now there are exceptions, but that doesn't make the rule void.

But for the most part, and you know, you know, if you've ever fasted, it's much easier. Once you get that control under, it's like you're moving, but man, a big steak at In-N-Out or a couple big hamburgers at In-N-Out Burger and chocolate shake, I'm like, might as well hit Krispy Kreme tonight. I might as well, and then you write because you've let that wall down, that wall of discipline.

So discipline strengthens you again. And I don't know where you're at this morning, it doesn't matter, but you can begin building the wall today, just one brick at a time. Begin building that wall and saying no to things that God might be convicting you about.

The Old Testament punishments were extreme because of the seriousness of sin. Self-control was the mechanism that kept sin at bay. Controlling self is not only about actions, it's also about attitudes, such as anger, jealousy, bitterness, judgmentalism, and selfishness.

Because sometimes we think of self-controlling self, I'm not gonna go off, but it's also in here in the heart, in here. Because we can be critical, we can judge mental of things, and we are losing that discipline to bring our thoughts captive. The Bible says take every thought captive.

You know what, that's not a good thought. That's not right, Lord help me. And you take that thought captive, because if you don't, it'll take you captive.

It'll carry you wherever you want to go. Anywhere your feet go, your mind first thought of. So it takes place there.

We have certain responsibilities that engage God's grace, strength, and blessings. This is amazing. And I know in Christian theology, and that's why I try to be careful if you ever notice, because I try not to get, it's all about discipline, discipline, discipline, discipline, discipline, why aren't you guys here at five in the morning every single morning, and why aren't you doing this, and why aren't you, you get a drill sergeant.

That's good for Navy SEALs. But you can get really extreme and become legalistic and rigid and domineering and forceful. And that's not healthy either.

But then the other side is just nothing, just hey man, whatever I want to do, I want to do. And I had the discipline stuff, that was back for the Old Testament saints. But today we live on, and I love this one, we're no longer under the law, we're under grace.

So we can just kind of live however we want. And that's not healthy either. So in the Bible we have responsibilities, and if we do something, it engages God's grace, it engages God's strength, and it engages God's blessing upon our lives.

He blesses the person who's disciplined, whose heart is right, who's seeking after God. Doesn't it take discipline to seek Him? Oh, gee, great amount of discipline to seek Him. So He's a rewarder of those who, diligence means I don't see the fruit, but I'm gonna keep doing it.

It takes discipline. So let's look at a few Scriptures. Have you found honey? Yes, I have.

Eat only as much as you need, lest you be filled with it and vomit. That's a great verse on food control. And we forget 2,000 years ago, actually, Proverbs, probably 3,500 years ago, how they ate and different things.

They would just be out walking, and here's this huge beehive, and they're just gorging themselves. It's gluttony on the honey. And so it's actually a great application for today too.

Feed the body what it needs, not what it wants. And so hey, if you found this, if you guys just eat what you need. Eat what you need, and that's a major healthcare crisis in our nation, is obesity and type 2 diabetes.

I won't go into all that. I have many times before, but this is the solution. This is the solution.

And it's hard, I know, because somebody left me two Pop-Tarts on my desk, and both of them aren't making it home. My wife said to bring, right? I mean, both of them might not make it home. I have to bring one home.

But they're gonna be here. I'm sorry, that's something for Ignite. Let me change gears.

Proverbs 27.12, a prudent man foresees evil, and he, a what? A prudent man foresees evil, and he hides himself. I think most of us can foresee where something's going, can't we? It's not like, like Gomer Pyle, he just went, you know, and just walking. I mean, you see, like, I see where this is going.

I see where this is going. There have been times, I just did a couple weeks ago, I texted Abram, my wife, and Tim at the same time. I was in a situation where everyone left, and I was in a building with another female.

She's in a different room, I'm in my office, you know, I'm working, I'm like, oh, everything, okay, hey guys, I'll be home in about 30 minutes, just letting you know, because you can foresee things. You can, people say things, wrong implications, and so you can foresee, and you, now, once that went out, there was a lot of freedom. Like, whew, because sin grows in darkness.

If you try to keep things hidden, it'll grow in darkness. It'll grow in darkness. I've went to elders before, I say, hey guys, I'm struggling with this.

Just be praying for me, ask my wife, you know, we'll just help. You know, and you bring it to the light. It kills it, because we continue in our addictions, don't we, in the darkness.

Oh, I got this under control. You don't have it under control. You can't control it.

It controls you, eventually. What's that saying, I don't know if I remember now, but sin takes you farther than you want to go, costs you more than you want to pay, and keeps you longer than you want to stay. Here's the thing, this is what I mentioned about Ignite, I'm glad I remembered it.

I'm speaking this Wednesday at Ignite. I'm gonna bring them a whole bunch of Pop-Tarts. But I'm gonna say, oh, by the way, guys, I just got a text that while she was making it, some of the rat poison from the shelf, a lot fell into the batch.

So this appetite they had is now over. And I can't take credit, Steve Schell talked about this years ago on his podcast about in a cake, the same thing with a cake. But once you see the death in it, it changes your appetite.

Man, this porn, I liked it, but you know, it's no big deal. But do you see the death in it? Apply that to compromise, and I'll talk about this more tomorrow morning. Compromise, you have to see the death in it.

Doesn't that change things? A Pop-Tart? Hey, some rat poison fell in there. Who's eating it? Is anybody still gonna eat it? I don't think so. What about some marijuana fell in it? See, nobody's.

See, that's how compromise works. A little bit, look a little bit closer, a little bit closer. But you have to see the death in it.

Proverbs 28, he who tills his land will have plenty of bread. I'm gonna try not to get too political, but this is my problem with the handout movement in our country. It started with good intentions.

I think we should help single moms and people who need it. That's the whole point of, let's say, welfare system or Section 8 housing. At the root of it, Ben Carson, when he was over HUD, I heard him talking about this.

The root of it was really a good idea, but government can't do anything really good because they're over the whole United States. So this good concept then, but then allow people to take advantage of it. And the Bible is clear, you must work in order to eat.

He who tills his land, if you're able, of course. Actually, the Bible would even provide for those who wouldn't. You know, leave your orchards open on the side.

Let the poor come and take the food. And so the Bible would give some leeway there. But if you till your land, you will have plenty of bread.

How many of you know what that means? Probably the old timers, yeah? I remember when my dad hooked me up to a gas rototiller. Man, that will keep, and you know, you just go and you go through the dirt and I don't remember what we were planting, but back then you planted things. And you tilled it in order to plant the seeds, in order for the produce to grow.

So it's basically like disciplined to work, correct? He who tills his land has plenty of bread. So that tells me he who doesn't till his land doesn't have plenty. And so we have to, there's a victim mentality now in our country, handout mentality, victim mentality.

I know a lot of people are happy, you know, the school loans were paid off and things like that, but it wasn't really free. Somebody's paying for those. The handouts that our government are giving, a lot of people coming into our country legally, especially in California.

That's not gonna create a good environment because the more you just give me, give me, give me, it's expectations and it's not even biblical. What is the solution? I have no idea. It's like saying, what's the solution after the Titanic hits the iceberg? So it's a lifelong battle to be disciplined.

You can't go on a fast and kill every lust. God rewards those who diligently seek Him. Romans 13, 14 tells us to make no provision for the flesh.

What does that mean? Romans 13, 14, make no provision for the flesh. I love this Greek word. If you have time, you can look it up.

It's easy to find now. I think there's one more, a different slide for this one. It basically means don't plan ahead to satisfy the flesh.

Make no provision for the flesh to fulfill its lusts. So, when we plan ahead, you know what that looks like, right? Oh, my wife's gone tonight, or this is gonna happen, or I'm planning ahead to sin. We've over the years prayed with people in the prayer room.

Like, they have their vodka in their purse. Like, I need to give this to you guys, deliver me. I came in for prayer because tonight I'm getting ready to go party.

I'm ready, I've already made plans for that, but I don't wanna do that now, I'm convicted. I need prayers. And so, it means planning ahead to sin.

Don't plan ahead to sin, but do plan ahead to walk in the Spirit. So, I'm gonna give you, since we're in the book of Proverbs, seven ways that you can break down your city walls and the areas we obviously know we need to be careful in. Sexual sin, right, number one.

The more we feed certain appetites, the more they grow. That's an area that has to be shored up. And of course, that will look different to different people.

I'm not gonna, I mean, there's so many different ways and people say, should I get accountability? It doesn't hurt, but that's not a safeguard. It really comes from the heart. Accountability can help, but it's not a safeguard.

Things on your computer can help, but there's ways around it. So, it has to come from the heart. And then number two, it talks about, the Proverbs talks about laziness.

The flesh takes the course of least resistance. So, you'll have to be disciplined to tell your flesh, no, no flesh. I'm gonna take the course of harder resistance.

Don't do hard things, do very hard things. And that's why sometimes we do challenge you to come Sunday mornings at 6 a.m. Get out of the comfort, well, it's not cold out anymore, so it shouldn't be as hard. Right, just get up.

I'm just gonna go and worship for an hour and a half. Watch what a difference that makes. And the reason we don't, even myself from time to time, is because the flesh, I mean, obviously there's exceptions, but it's because that flesh wants to take the course of least resistance.

And I think this is so important, because the Proverbs doesn't talk about workaholics. So, we think, okay, it must not have anything to do with, that must be okay. Actually, workaholics are lazy at home.

When I failed in my 20s, I was lazy at home. But I was a hard-driving, 12-hour-a-day-working, paying the bills. This is success.

This is how men rate success. The world's way, not God's way. And so, we do have to be careful, just because, man, I'm working.

I know, gosh, if I start, not even at this church, but just all over, the guys who are very successful, workaholics, their families are falling apart. All these guys, these billionaires, or even multi-millionaires, look at their family life. There's a cost to that.

But they brag. Brag. Look how many apartments I own.

Look at this, I own a real estate, and this, and this. But their kids are falling away from the Lord, if they even knew the Lord. That's why so many Hollywood actors and actresses, their children, it's sad what happens to them.

Because it's all about them and their career. Same thing, I see men pursuing it. So you can succeed in business, but fail at home.

Does that happen all the time? Why are we seeing so much, so much issues in our country? Jails are full. And if I had time, I did this a few years ago at a men's conference, I think I could find the notes. But how much higher the suicide rate is in fatherless homes? Out of wedlock, fatherless homes.

Crime, fatherless homes. Down the list, that happens in fatherless homes. And of course, what many of us say, well, I'm still at home.

Well, let me remind you, you don't have to leave home to be absent. You don't have to leave home to be absent. Can't you? Stay at home.

And this does not help things. I've been realizing a lot lately how much, I don't even talk to my kids sometimes, these darn electronics. Home, but absent.

And then of course, number three, it talks about, Proverbs talks about our addictions and why discipline is so important. What you once controlled now controls you. Being disciplined in these areas and you'll feel so much better.

And of course, it talks about gluttony. And the biblical answer is moderation. Of course, fasting is so important.

And then five, foolishness. Foolishness. Much of Proverbs is about foolishness.

So it takes discipline to make wise decisions. Decisions made in pride and self-gratification are destructive. Doesn't it take discipline to make wise decisions? Because we usually say, I want, from buying a home, buying a car, buying a toy, whatever it is, we don't exercise discipline.

We make foolish decisions. And then parenting. Parenting, being disciplined, isn't that hard? Let them see Christ in you.

Be disciplined to let them see Christ in you. And guys, it is hard. I mean, I want to do more devotionals for my kids.

I'm going to have to step up my game in that area. And just don't do hard things. Do very hard things.

And the reward of discipline is incredible. I'll explain it in just a minute as I close. And then seven, money.

Proverbs talks a lot about money and being disciplined in money. Oh, how important is that? Don't send this message to your wife. She'll get it on her own, hopefully.

How many wish their wives were more disciplined in the area of money? Nobody, huh? I heard you. I'm going to tell her too. But I think a lot of that comes from because the man makes some money, and the man, the bank accounts, and we'll get, I mean, that's a whole other thing.

But it feels like they feel there's some freedom there. And I would say, give your wife some freedom. Not overspending, but let them experience just some, I mean, we have rules like Prophecy, not over 100 bucks, we talk to each other, things like that.

But I think it's so important to let them experience freedom. And it's just coming from a guy who used to be real controlling. And I wasn't controlling because I had a controlling personality.

I just felt like, okay, I need to control where the money goes because I know what the IRS is going to want. I control the thermostat because I know what the bill's going to be. I just gave that up this summer.

Holy smokes. Man, and control this. Control the vehicles.

And they become controlling, and your family can feel boxed in and not free. Giving them that freedom. Giving them that freedom.

That's why I'm glad my oldest is turning 19. She still wants to stay at home because she doesn't feel that type of isolation and control. Make your own decisions.

But of course, lead the best we can when it comes to hard decisions. I'm not saying that, but on the little things, there should be some flexibility. And so let me share a verse with you that this comes from 1 Corinthians 9, 24 through 26.

Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but only one receives the prize? Therefore, run in such a way that you may obtain it. And everyone who competes for the prize is temperate in all things. Okay, we're getting here to the end.

If you're tired, then you're gonna like September's non-men's breakfast breakfast. You'll feel more awake. You know why that is? Because 50% of your body's energy is used to digest the food.

That means it leaves your brain. And everyone who competes for the prize, they are what? They are controlled. So if even athletes are disciplined, how much more should we be? That's why Paul said, I run, not with uncertainty.

I don't fight as one who beats the air. I have a plan. I have a purpose.

I have temperance in all things. In other places, Paul says, all things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the control of anything. That's why I love how people go, I can smoke, or I can alcohol, I can whatever.

Okay, but you're under its control. You better stop boasting. Your liberty has now become a vice.

Temperate, again, it means moderate. Self-restrained, calm, and not excessive. And if you have a type A addictive personality like me, that is hard, isn't it? You can't just have one piece of gum.

I'll eat that pack throughout the day. 1 Corinthians 9.27, but I discipline my body. So here's Paul's answer.

But I discipline my body, and I bring it into subjection. Basically, I bring it under my control. Therefore, when I preach to others, I don't become disqualified.

Now, he's not talking about, and I'll talk about this in a minute, he's not talking about salvation. The prize is running for the crown of recognition from Christ that he has served well. Because some people say, he's talking about Paul can lose your salvation.

I don't think it's saying that at all. It's saying, because you know, if you're constantly failing and falling, where's your testimony? Ask Gateway Church. Ask others.

It ruins your testimony. That's why you have to discipline your body and bring it into subjection. Or when you're preaching to others, you become basically disqualified.

It's who are you to say? Do you know how many people we've seen like chew out couples and give marriage advice, yet their wife's ready to walk out the door? Hey, buddy, you might want to go fix your own home first, right? Because he's disqualified. Discipline. Discipline the body often begins with blanket victory.

What's blanket victory? Take that blanket off, get out to your prayer closet and follow Psalm 63. Early will I seek you. My soul thirsts for you.

My flesh longs for you. Whether you're a night owl, you can do whatever you do, but discipline begins in the morning. And actually, it's fueled from the night before, isn't it? If I'm up late watching what I shouldn't watch on Netflix, even though it's not that bad, but it's not that good, it's keeping me up two hours later than I should and if you're like me, some ice cream and chocolate sound good about that time.

And then I set the course for the morning. I don't want to get up. But can you imagine, you know what, I'm going to cut off electronics, I'm going to read the Bible, I'm going to read E.M. Bounds, I'm going to get hungry for God and you wake up hungry for more of God because you just fed on that the night before.

Guys, it's not difficult, but it's also not easy, correct? The fruit of being filled is self-control. Here's the key. Play on words.

The fruit of being filled with the Spirit is self-control and an important mechanism of being filled is controlling self. It works together. Because when I talk about this in the past, people said, well, brother, you just need to be, people just need to be filled with the Spirit.

Okay, but how are they filled with the Spirit? They're filled with the Spirit by disciplining themselves. I'm never filled mightily with, you don't want to hear a sermon after I just picked out a Krispy Kreme and gave into something I shouldn't have, right? I'm not filled, I'm empty because I've quenched and grieved the Spirit. So disciplining the body leads to the filling of the Holy Spirit and being filled now leads to self-control.

It works both ways. You can't have one without the other. When Paul said be filled, actually before that he says what? Do not be drunk with wine.

It's debauchery. But instead, right? Instead, so the choice is made. Do I go grab a cold IPA with 9% alcohol? No, no, no.

No, and be filled with the Spirit by making the right choices. An exchange takes place. And that's what, I discipline my body, Paul says, I bring it under control.

Self-control is produced by the Holy Spirit to help us resist the power of the flesh. Check out Galatians 5. And then I'll come to an end here. The dangers of discipline, I hinted at them, but they are very important.

I'm going to cover some of this tomorrow actually. It fits right in. When we take control of something, right? Have you ever taken control and said, okay, enough is enough? Enough is enough.

I'm going in. Sometimes we, and sometimes we must be extreme to tame the wild beast. When I, I don't do this now, but when I used to help what they would consider morbidly obese people, or, you know, just, I mean, they're heading down a very dangerous road with the lifespan and things like that.

They would have to make some extreme, they'd have to take some extreme measures. You know, I'm not talking about that. There are times for that.

But when we take back control, wisdom is needed, because that discipline can now turn into perfectionism. And that's kind of what legalism is. I don't know how many of you have heard that term.

If you're starting to get tired, blame the burrito, not me. And the Pop-Tart. Legalism is I'm adding these things to my relationship with Christ.

Yeah, I believe in Jesus, but I've got to do these things. And discipline with the wrong heart is simply an arrogant Pharisee. I fast.

I do these things. Look at this sinner over there. And the sinner's beating his chest saying, God, have mercy on me.

Jesus says, who do you think is justified? Not the Pharisee. And so many are disciplining and turn into perfectionism and legalism. It can turn into a loss of joy.

It's actually supposed to produce joy. The fruit of disciplining yourself is joy. Love, joy, peace, contemplation.

Don't you feel so much better when you've told the flesh no? It's amazing. Instead of caving in, many of you probably came here disgruntled, discouraged, but you don't have to leave here that way. You can say, Lord, I got spanked.

Spiritually speaking, I'm going to get back on track. A loss of joy because now I'm just going through the motions. Oh, I can't do that.

I can't do this. I can't, I can't, versus I don't want to because it's going to ruin my relationship with the Lord. I've seen so many people that get, there's a loss of joy.

Have you ever seen that? You've seen it in very conservative, right, churches that are just, they're just like that girl's shorts are too short. She don't need to kick her out of the church. That guy's out, you know, and there's just no joy.

They're very disciplined. They're up at four in the morning the last 20 years and they're just, they can, you know, they can run their house like a drill sergeant, but there's no joy. You have to be very careful when that happens.

Of course, it can turn into disorders. I won't talk a lot about that, but that's what the muscle dysphoria, I don't know if, dysmorphia? Yeah, or orthorexia, all these things. Did you know there's like, people can get addicted, like think they're too small and want to inject their muscles with stuff or get too focused on health.

That's what I just talked to you about earlier. There's so many people out there, I see they're so focused on this. They're disciplined, but now it's turned into, it's way, way off the scale of health.

It's into fanaticism. It's good to have a passion. And how do I know? If these things are beginning to hurt my relationship with the Lord, if they're beginning to hurt my marriage and my kids, then, obviously, it's not very good anymore.

I need to find that balance. And because I try to take care of myself in this area, maybe because I saw my dad died at a young age. The other night, I took my daughters to yogurt.

And they were so happy, they're telling their mom, they're telling their friends, like what's the big deal? Dad took us to get Froyo, right? And put stuff on it. And so I just make sure there's a control, right? So they can still have fun and see the excitement of life, but at the same time, have some discipline. It can turn into an exercise addiction or an eating disorder.

Or even fasting. Even fasting. I remember when I wrote my book, I'm like, okay, this is getting too much.

I need to get back to the center, but it's where God had me for a season to help a lot of people. And so bringing it back to that center. But then the other side of it is just, oh, I don't care, just let yourself go.

And a lack of discipline is not good either. So always remember this as you leave here this morning, that there is delight of discipline. There is delight, there's joy.

It qualifies our testimony. There's nothing more satisfying than telling people about Jesus and knowing that you not only believe it, but you live it out. Isn't there more power in your words and in your story? It controls our destiny.

Now I'm careful here too because I believe in God's sovereignty, but I also see a lot of Scriptures that command us to make no provision for the flesh. Right, flee sexual morality. Resist the devil.

There's a lot of words in there that call the Christian to discipline themselves. And because of that, and I'm convinced, I don't know, you know, I've heard different, we don't know because the Bible's not clear, but does God have this plan, let's say for me for example, this plan for me, okay Shane, here's what I'd like to do in your life, but if you don't discipline your body, if you don't deal with these things, it might not be there. It might knock you off course the way you're living.

The way you're living can knock you off course. So could it be that the discipline and following God, that could open up more doors of opportunity that God has for us? Because that's hard for me to swallow if we're consistently in sin and not disciplining our bodies and God's gonna say, oh, it's no big deal. Here, here's what I have for you, you can take it anyway.

Because it's a journey. It's a journey that God takes us on. It can control, or maybe not control our destiny, but it can definitely aid our destiny.

Maybe some of you, you're praying for marriages to be restored or to start a ministry. And I'm convinced that's why God had me wait till I was 40 to plant the church. Because it would have been a disaster.

Disaster in my 20s. I would not be pastoring anymore if I planted this church in my 20s. So sometimes the character has to match up to the calling.

Because God knows, doesn't mean we're perfect, right? You still gotta be on guard all the time, but there is a process. I don't know how much I should share with you guys, but just don't share this video. Kidding, of course.

But I knew, I knew, before I met Morgan, do you know when God's convicting you? Like, just this thought that won't go away? This like, ah, I need to do that, I need to do that. I, ah, man, and you kinda know it's the Lord. And I knew I had to give up, you know, or at least moderation or whatever you wanna call it, but I could no longer continue to drink, like I did, in order to meet her.

And I knew it, and it was a hard battle. Because when you come back to the Lord, you don't just stop cussing. How many of you, that took a little while? I remember saying, brother, you curse, I'm a work in progress.

Because that's how you communicate, coming from construction, you say, you know, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. That's how you order people around, go get the, you know, it's like, it's hard to just turn that, turn that gauge off, right? You know. You know, now I hear it here before I say it here, so it's like, mm, mm, mm, this won't look good.

And so I knew, okay, I have to deal with that. What about if I didn't? Because you attract who you are. And I knew in order for that next step, I had to get this area of my life in order.

And then even planning the church, I felt, felt the desire to do it, but I had to get, I had to, I had to soften up. I had to soften up in order to plan a church. It was fine when you're public speaking because you're not shepherding, you're not leading, I can go in and men's conferences and boom, boom, boom.

But there was a period that God had to chip off some pride and still there, right? He's still working till the day I die, just like He is in all of your lives. But there was a, and what about if I would have never, what if I said, no, I'm fighting this, I don't want to be a pastor, they're weak, they're wimps. I'm gonna tell people off.

And even when we started the church, I've changed a lot. I remember hearing a couple of the first sermons, I'm like, oh my goodness, wow. Ron was there, Ron Emar was there and his wife, and ask him, ask him.

But God, because the way you learn is you hurt people, they tell you you hurt them, you're like, oh man, I'm sorry, but gosh, Lord, help me. And you learn, you grow. I mean, I'd say stuff like did this, but whatever I'm saying, so if you don't like this, there's the door, don't let it hit you on the way out.

Because we're, you know, I'm like, whoa, man. Now sometimes I might feel it, I just won't say it. But see, God has to soften up for what He's called you to do.

So disciplining your body will help facilitate destiny. Also, it conquers our passions and the things that oppose God. So from that comes delight.

It guards our relationship with God as well. That's a delight. You've got guardrails, you've got things that can guard your relationship with the Lord.

I'm not as worried of Satan as I am with the enemy within. I don't know about you. But within, we'll do more damage than Satan without.

And discipline helps to guard that relationship. And it fills us with the Spirit, which always brings delight. Hey, I'm saying no to this.

I'm saying no to this, Lord, I'm seeking You. And as a result now, Lord, I'm filled more with Your Spirit. And what is the fruit of the Spirit? Anger, frustration, discontentment.

No, filled with the Spirit is love and joy and peace. I've never seen an undisciplined believer experience massive amounts of the fruit of the Spirit. They're always grumpy.

They're always angry. They don't like what I have to say. You're too convicting.

Leave me alone. Could it be that God is convicting you through His Word? And I know the joy of being filled with the Spirit. And I know the pain of being empty.

Night and day, there are seasons of intense self-control. Again, such as on a diet or when fasting. But joy comes from a lifestyle of discipline.

Joy comes from a lifestyle of discipline. Notice I didn't say a perfect lifestyle of discipline. Do you ever fall? You need to get back up.

I just told you a perfect example. I'm not going to eat today and I go in and there's a Pop-Tart. Well, guess what? There's no more Pop-Tart.

Who put that in there? You or Mike? Somebody did. Now, that's a little thing, right? But, it can be frustrating. I say, oh, I just wanted to... Man! But you get back up and you learn your lesson.

Or some of you may be looking at things on your phone that you shouldn't be. You need to get back up and keep fighting. But don't rest on willpower.

Don't rest on that. For example, the software I have, every single website I visit that's questionable goes to my wife's email. You think you're going to double-think things? Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. You want to get really embarrassed? Have it go to your mom too. So there's things you can do.

Say, I'm not going. You have self-control. You have restraint.

I'm not strong enough to walk through life all the time and never be tempted by all the things that are out there. I'm a pastor. I'm super-shame.

I read the Bible every morning. Perfect example. I went to Mammoth Lakes to get some... It took my son and I stayed a few days to work on the sermon, to do all the things.

Just recently, on the 4th of July. Never even crossed my mind alcohol and nothing. But as I'm walking around, all the... I'm like, man, it's hot out.

So you go from not even thinking about it ever. I'm preparing sermons. And now, ice-cold IPAs? Wherever I'm going and people having fun, it's like something, right? You guys, let's be honest.

Come on, stop playing games. You're like, oh, I can't relate. Give me a break.

Now for you, it might be something else, correct? But I'm just saying, well, Lord, that's probably not going to end. Can't You just have one? Maybe, but what if it turns into six? And so making that choice, going back, telling my wife, man, it's harder than I thought here. It's like, just walking around, I'm going back to the condo.

And then worship just came alive. I was working on this sermon. And just wanting to write and seek because you made that decision to say, man, I don't even want to think.

I have to take thoughts captive in my mind. Like if you start thinking about that, whatever your struggle is, the more you start to contemplate it, the more it'll draw you in. Right, you get the spams.

Hey, I'm from Russia. Would like to meet you. Well, I mean, I might as well see what she looks like, right? Delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete.

If I don't know you, I'm deleting. Having those safeguards in place. And so it's a lifestyle of discipline and getting back up, even if you've blown it in all these areas I've mentioned.

You say, Lord, help me in these areas. How can I safeguard these things? Because if you give compromise an inch, she will take a mile. She will take a mile.

You know what else looked good up there was those street tacos. Man, but I'll eat eight. So she fled.

These things that have never come alive, come alive in certain environments. And having that discipline, having those boundaries. And then I think I mentioned this on Sunday, but I wanted to share it with you.

Two natures, this is biblical as well, two natures beat within my breast. The one is foul, the one is blessed. The one I love, the one I hate, the one I feed, I will dominate.

Or the one I feed will dominate. Isn't that true? There's two natures, the flesh and the spirit. One is foul, the flesh.

The other is blessed, being filled with the spirit. The one I love, God's spirit. The one I hate, but the one I feed will dominate.