Mary Forbes (1774–1854) had Scots roots but was born and raised in Bermuda and was the only child of Dr. and Mrs George Forbes. On September 6, 1791, when she was just 17, she married Army Lieutenant Thomas Winslow of the 47th Regiment. Shortly after this, she came under spiritual convictions and was brought to gospel deliverance while pleading the promise, “Ask, and ye shall receive”. Christ Himself powerfully told her heart,“I am Thy salvation!” and she was saved.
Mary is the mother of Octavius Winslow.
As a child, Octavius and family would worship at Pentonville Chapel under the ministry of Rev. Thomas Sheppard. During this time of his life, he suffered from what seemed to be a life threatening illness. While staying in Twickenham, a nurse accidentally administered an incorrect medicine that doctors would later say would have killed ten men. But it was in God’s providence that he would live.
Octavius’s father was from a wealthy family but by 1815, following his retirement from the army, he suffered ill-health and the loss of his fortune due to one of several national financial disasters that occurred in this period. A decision was soon made to move to America, but before Mr. Winslow could join his wife and children in New York, he died. At the same time, their youngest child died too. Octavius was but 7 years old.
Widowed at 40, responsible for a large family, and scarcely settled in America, Mrs Winslow’s entire life was turned upside down. Worst of all, spiritual darkness and despondency overwhelmed her for many months. They were a deeply religious family and Octavius later wrote a book about their experiences from his mother’s perspective in a book entitled Life in Jesus.
Winslow was saved under the ministry of Samuel Eastman, pastor of Stanton Street Baptist Church in New York City. On Wednesday, April 11, 1827, Octavius shared his testimony and professed his faith in his Savior. He would later be baptized in the Hudson River on the Lord’s Day of May 6 at 4pm. Mary would later pen this:Mary and her children lived in New York City until 1820. Then, after a four month visit back to England, they would then move to Sing Sing, NY on the Hudson River for “four years of congenial repose”. In 1824, they would move back to New York City for a season of “special revival” where brothers Octavius, Isaac, and George would become converted and later convinced of God’s calling to ministry.
| “ | My children are earnestly engaged in bringing sinners where the Holy Ghost is displaying His mighty power. They visit from house to house, dealing faithfully with all they meet who know not God. |
(Wikipedia)
Books
Life in Jesus : a memoir of Mrs. Mary Winslow, arranged from her correspondence, diary, and thoughts (1860)
"Christian experience: Words of loving counsel and sympathy. Ed. by O. Winslow"
“I shall enter heaven a poor sinner saved by grace. I seem to have done nothing for the Lord, who has done so much for me.”
“I shall soon be with Jesus! I shall see Him face to face. Oh, glorious prospect!”
“Oh, how full His heart is of love I cannot express to you! And if I had millions of tongues, I could not tell you how precious He is at this moment to my soul. I feel His sensible presence. He is near to me; so near, that I feel as if I could embrace Him.”
“What a glorious prospect I have in view! Who can picture it? No tongue can tell how I love Jesus; not because it is my duty to love Him, but because I cannot help loving Him. He is the chief among ten thousand, and the altogether lovely One.”
“I am the chief of sinners, but am dear, very dear, to the heart of Jesus, who shed His blood to save me, even me, as if there were not another soul to be saved.”
“It is one thing to talk of death: it is quite another thing, when it becomes a reality, to grapple with it.”
“How long, Lord, will You keep me in the valley of the shadow of death? Why are Your chariot wheels so long in coming?”
“The gloom has all passed, and I have a full view of the glory that awaits me.”
“Lord, I weary, I weary, I weary to be gone. Keep me patient, waiting Your will. I must be perfected through suffering; not one pang too severe, nor one sorrow too much.”
“Read to me the precious words of Jesus. Endeavor to keep my mind upon His truth. Christ is the Rock upon which my feet are placed.”
“Keep close intimacies with Jesus. We must live upon Christ, and we must die upon Christ.”
“Oh, live for eternity! This poor world is passing away; the reality is to come, and a glorious reality it is. How important it is to walk so as to please God in all things!”
“Little faith will bring the soul to heaven; great faith will bring heaven into the soul.”
“My first joy in heaven will be to see Jesus!”
“I am passing away, but not a single cloud veils Christ from my view. Language cannot express how happy, happy I am. Words fail to describe the preciousness of Jesus to my soul.”
“I am going home! going home! A welcome home. I have not a need, nor care, nor trouble.”
“I never so much felt my dependence upon the Holy Spirit as I do now. My first prayer in the morning when I awake is addressed to the Holy Spirit, that He would take possession of my thoughts, my imagination, my heart, my words, throughout the day, directing, controlling, and sanctifying them all.”
“If there is a spot upon earth more blessed than another, it is the mercy seat. None can tell the joy that springs from it.”
“He would not have me a spoilt child, therefore He has employed the rod; but all His corrections and rebukes have been in love.”
“The Holy Spirit ministers to me like a little child. My loving Shepherd cherishes the lambs as well as the sheep; and He will come and take me to Himself. I shall not go alone. I want to go. I want to go.”
“Oh, why are His chariot wheels so long in coming? Why does He delay? I am longing to depart, to be with Christ. All is ready.”
“Soon I shall be singing His high praises in heaven. Oh, how great His love! How can He love so vile a sinner as I? Yet He loves me. I have nothing of my own goodness to bring in my hand; all, all I cast away.”
“What will the music of heaven be!”
Gazing one evening from her bed upon a magnificent sunset, she remarked, “Oh, if the outside of heaven is so beautiful, what must it be within!”
“I long, I weary to be gone; but I would not be impatient.”
After a day of extreme languor, she said, “The Lord has fed me today with drops of honey.”
“There is a buoyancy, a vitality in the principle of the renewed soul, which, in dying, cannot be depressed. The more the body decays and sinks, the higher it rises to its native heaven.”
“I would not be impatient, but I long to end the conflict, and be with Jesus. Oh, how precious He is to my soul!”
“The glory of heaven is Christ.”
“Meet me in heaven!” was her dying charge. And then, when her lips were thought forever sealed; lips that had testified so long and so faithfully of Jesus; she exclaimed, with a voice of wondrous energy and power, “A cloudless death! A cloudless death! A cloudless death!” So resplendent was the glory now surrounding her; so sacred and awe-struck the feelings of all who gazed upon the scene; the spot where the last conflict was waging seemed more like the vestibule of heaven than the chamber of death.
While her gathered children were surrounding her dying bed, watching the closing scene, expecting each moment to catch her last sigh, her eyes partly opened, her lips moved, and with a low yet distinct voice she rapidly repeated the words, “I see You! I see You! I see You! I see You!” The unearthly grandeur of the scene transcends all description. We felt
that heaven was opened; that Christ was there; that the eternal world enclosed us. And as her voice grew fainter and fainter, and the words died softly upon her lips, she ceased to move; a holy quiet reigned; a solemn calm ensued; her sanctified spirit was in the bosom of her Lord. From the mental emotion, the soul ecstasy through which she had but just passed; rapt in the vision of her living Lord; there still lingered a luster in the eye, a smile upon the parted lips, and a glow, like that of sunset, upon the countenance, which formed a picture of inimitable beauty and grandeur.
She has reached, at last, the heaven of glory, for which her panting thoughts and heaving heart so yearned. She has looked upon Christ, whom her soul adored with an affection so absorbing and intense. Glories which the human eye could never see; joys which human thought could never conceive, and music such as earth has never heard, have burst upon her astonished blissful spirit. At His feet who died for her, adoringly she casts her crown, exclaiming, “Worthy is the Lamb!”
“I have fought a good fight, I have finished the race, and I have remained faithful. And now the prize awaits me; the crown of righteousness that the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give me on that great day of his return. And the prize is not just for me but for all who eagerly look forward to his glorious return.” 2 Timothy 4:7-8
“Let me die the death of the righteous, and may my end be like theirs!” Numbers 23:10
“Jesus, You are my chief joy, my life, my all. Without You this world would be wretchedness itself. Keep, oh keep me near Yourself, nearer, nearer still; and allow no earthly love to occupy Your place in my heart.”
All events are in His hands to direct, and overrule, and bless to His own redeemed people.
When a corrupted Christianity spreads, what cold, heartless formality prevails!
What communion can a formalist have with God? Communion is supposed to be an interchange of sentiment, feeling, and expression. What communion could one have with a statue? You may speak to it, question it; but there is no response, no intimation of feeling, no communion. So is it with the mere religious formalist. He regularly says his prayers, but it is to an unknown God. He repeats the same again and again, but he does not know the Being he addresses. There is no response, no interchange of feeling; above all, of love. There is no answer from the Lord, no bending down of His ear, no lifting up of His countenance, no cheering welcome. Sadly, the formalist is satisfied with this. He does what he thinks is his duty. He repeats his lifeless, heartless prayers, and thinks he has done well. And so he lives and dies with a lie in his right hand, unless God, in His sovereign mercy, awakens him from his awful delusion, and shows him his lost and undone condition.
Go with all you need to Jesus; keep nothing back. Go with all the simplicity of a babe, and tell Jesus. He will bow down His loving ear, and listen to all you have to say to Him.
Oh, let us bow our neck to the cross, for Jesus is walking with us every step of the way! When tried, rush at once into the very bosom of Christ, and feel the warm pulsations of His own loving heart, and rest your head there. All will be well. He is with you now, and will never leave nor forsake you.
Oh, the wondrous, the ocean like love of Jesus! Who can fathom it?
Oh, carry all your needs to Him, not doubting that He not only hears you, but is every moment watching over you! All is well, and though dark clouds come between, there is a bright light behind them. Go at once with your trouble, be it what it may; nothing is too trivial to carry to Him. Let us come to Jesus and bring to Him all our cares, large and small, and tell Him all that is in our hearts.
Oh, the care of the Good Shepherd! His wakeful eye is ever upon us, and His loving heart is ever towards us!
In heaven we shall have new bodies, more beauteous than the brightest angel in heaven, and standing, too, nearer to the Savior than they.
Oh, we shall see, when we arrive in heaven, how wonderful has been the wisdom that has guided us in all our journey through! You may be quite certain that all that takes place, small or great, is in that covenant that is ordered in all things and sure. Nothing is uncertain with God. A sparrow falls not to the ground without Him. You are of more value than many sparrows.
Jesus is indeed very precious to my soul. All creature love sinks into nothing before it. The more I see of the fulness, the boundless love of Christ, the more I sink in the dust of self abasement before Him.
What could we do in this world of manifold temptations, had we not a God to go to, ever ready to be a present help?
Allow no distance to arise between you and your best Friend. He has undertaken for us in all things. We need Him as our Counselor, as our Guide, as our Protector, as our Deliverer, in ten thousand ways. How needful and how sweet to be ever sitting at His feet, looking up and meeting His eye bending down upon us in love!
Confession of sin is one of the most sweet, holy, and profitable exercises of the soul. It endears us to Christ, and endears Christ to us. It brings us into a brokenhearted, contrite communion with a loving, sympathizing Savior, purifies the heart, and keeps the conscience tender and watchful.
Death, to the believer, is but passing out of a world of sorrow and of sin, and entering upon a world of indescribable glory! If we lived more in anticipation of the happiness that waits us, earth would have less hold on our hearts’ best affections.
All His dispensations are designed to draw you closer to Himself, and He would remove every object that comes between Him and you. You shall not have one trial too much. His loving eye is upon you; let yours be upon Him.
Dear friend, keep close to Jesus, and the throne of grace. If you feel your heart cold, go at once, and He will warm it. If you feel it hard and impenitent, go, and He will soften and awaken it to sweet contrition. Go, under all circumstances and with all frames. All your difficulties, however small or however great, you have a right to bring to Jesus, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you. Dear friend, we need to live more upon Him, like little helpless children. May the Lord bless and keep you very near Himself, is the prayer of your sincere friend in Christ.
It was love, infinite love that brought Jesus down to earth. It was love, infinite love that led Him to pass through the tremendous conflict, when he grappled with death, hell, and the grave. It was love, infinite love that sustained Him in it, and that brought Him out of it a royal Conqueror. It was love, infinite love that bore Him back to heaven, where He is now, and where we shall be also. And now, what have we to do here, but to glorify Him who has done such great things for us?
Oh the glorious prospect that is before the feeblest child of God! Look often at your inheritance. Take your walks in the ‘garden of love’ above! See Jesus there, no longer wearing a crown of thorns, but a diadem of glory!
Let us ever trust Jesus for His unchanging and unchangeable love. From everlasting to everlasting He has loved us; and all the varying dispensations of His loving providence are only to prepare us more completely for the place He is now preparing for us. Let us aim to see Him in all things, and to have Him ever present with us. How sweet to walk through this wilderness with our hand in His hand, feeling that He is leading us safely along the narrow road that leads to everlasting life. Dear friend, may Jesus be more and more precious to you and I. None but Jesus can make us happy here and hereafter.
Join me in praising God for His great and distinguishing mercy to us, in opening our eyes, and leading us to His beloved Son, that we might be saved, with a sure and everlasting salvation.
How is it with your soul? Are your prospects growing brighter and brighter as you travel on? Do you find Jesus nearer and more precious day by day? What progress have you made? You have had your conflicts, your wanderings, and backslidings many; but still onwards you must go. There is no standstill in this journey. Tell me when you saw Him last, and how you feel in the prospect of soon being with the beloved One forever and ever. I am not happy here without Him, and would be miserable indeed, were I not quite sure of seeing and dwelling with Him in glory. Jesus is all in all to my soul, and life would be wearisome indeed were it not so. He makes up the sum of my happiness here, and will be my joy, my life, and my glory hereafter. Dear friend, let us speed more our journey, nor loiter in the way.
Oh that the saints of God would live more in the anticipation of the glory that awaits them! There is much of heaven to be enjoyed even on earth. Let us live, too, more in holy familiarity with Jesus. Nothing is too much beneath His notice.
Jesus is the very same Jesus now that He was when He walked the streets of Jerusalem. Though His body is glorified, He is not altered. His heart is still the same, full of sympathy and love, ready to listen to all we have to say to Him, and to do all we ask Him to do, and in the best possible way. Precious Jesus! Is He not altogether lovely? He is everything to my soul. Life would be an aching void without Him.
Oh, how few really know God! I meet with many hearsay Christians, who have heard of Jesus, as Job did, with the hearing of the ear, but who have no personal acquaintance with Him. They have never come to Christ as poor, wretched, blind, and naked; and therefore they know nothing of that peace which the application of the atoning blood alone can impart. They have never come in contact with Christ. They only believe what others say of Him, and know nothing of a blessed recognition, a oneness and a holy communion between Jesus and the poor sinner, saved by sovereign grace, and eternal, everlasting love.
Oh, the luxury of prayer! To have true communion, familiar communion with God. To talk with God! To go and shut the door, and tell God all, all that is in our heart! To feel that He is listening to hear what we have to say to Him; and then to wait and see what He will say to us! No tongue can tell the rich enjoyment of sitting in all the helplessness of an infant at His feet, and know that He is listening to all I say to Him. I rest on His loving, fatherly care!
What could we do in this poor dying world without a throne of grace, and a God of grace upon the throne, in our every time of need? Oh, let us keep close to Him who loved us with an everlasting love, and with loving kindness has drawn us to Himself.
We are journeying to the inheritance which the Lord our God has given to us, through a world crowded with temptations on either side, which would divert us from the way, if it were possible. Our worst foe, the body of sin and of death, we bear about with us. But our Jesus is for us, and we can say, “More are they who are for us, than they who are against us.”
We are traveling fast, and at every step are nearing our heavenly home! We shall see Jesus soon! Oh, how soon! Jesus sits, in all the majesty of heaven, waiting to welcome His pilgrims home.
May you be led to see unceasingly that this world is not worthy of one anxious thought! It is all passing away, and we shall soon stand before the great white throne!
We are on a race course. The point from which we start is conversion; the goal to which we run is heaven; the prize for which we contend is a crown of glory, which the righteous Judge will give us at that great day. If, dear friend, you have started in this race, so run that you may obtain. Go forward. Do not rest where you are. How few lay these great things to heart! The world and its trifles so engross the thoughts, that God, and Christ, and eternity, with our vast responsibility, are shut out of sight; and Satan, the great foe of mankind, gains his point, unless sovereign grace interferes, and opens the blind eye to see the danger, and Jesus the Refuge!
Oh, it is with a holy, heart searching God that we have to do. And the soul is of more value than ten million worlds. What shall it profit a man if he gain the whole world and lose his own soul? These are solemn, awful truths; but only by a few are they laid to heart.
None will ever come to Jesus until they feel that they are lost and undone in themselves. He came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.
Oh, what is all the grandeur, wealth, and honor of this fleeting world, compared with the glory that awaits the believer in Jesus? Kings and queens pass away, and leave their crowns; but the Christian goes to his, and wears it through eternity, ever bright, ever pure!
How much more are our thoughts engaged with this present evil world, and our poor decaying bodies, than concerned to know what awaits us in an endless eternity. Is not this one of Satan’s devices? He will endeavor to often engage our thoughts with inconsequential trifles that would shame a child, in order to hide from us the eternal realities of the glory that awaits the believer. Oh, let us beware of Satan’s devices!
We cannot utter one real prayer but by the Holy Spirit. He it is who shows us our iniquity and helplessness, teaches us how to pray and what to ask for, and then responds to our prayer.
Eternity, eternity, with all its solemn realities, is before us!
Oh, the change from earth to heaven! The thought of seeing Jesus face to face! Think, the joy of that moment!
With all its hopes and glory, this is but a poor world, even if we could possess the whole of it. Take this world in its best attire, it is but a wilderness of ‘bitter sweets’.
Let us set out afresh to run the heavenly race; warmed with the love of Christ in our heart, anointed with the Holy Spirit, heaven in view, a crown of glory awaiting us, and Jesus on the throne ready to bid us welcome!
There is none on earth or in heaven like Jesus! He is the chief among ten thousand, the altogether lovely one. Oh, love Him! Give your whole, your undivided heart to Him. If I had a thousand, He would have them all.
If your heart appears cold, hard, and insensible, take it to Jesus, and tell Him how it is with you. He will warm, soften, and fill it with His love. Go, under all circumstances, and tell Him all you feel, and all you do not feel. Let nothing come between you and your best Friend. In all your fears, failures, and discouragements, go to Him, and tell Him all.
How boundless is the love of God to the feeblest of His little ones!
What will heaven be!
Nothing so keeps the heart right as having constant communication with Christ.
I am nearing day by day my heavenly inheritance. It seems at times almost in view. It is but a step, and I am there! The more I see of Jesus, the more He opens to me His loving heart, the deeper is my sorrow for sin. I lie down in the dust of His feet closer than ever I did before. I can truly say I abhor myself in dust and ashes before Him.
My heart seems ready to melt into contrition in view of the ten thousand thousand sins, wilful and aggravating, that I have committed against Him, who loved me with an everlasting love, and with loving kindness drew me to Himself.
It is sweet to think how soon, how very soon, we shall be fitted for the companionship of Jesus Himself, beholding Him in all His unveiled beauties. Does not the thought often gladden our heart, and fill your eyes with tears of joy, and holy contrition for sin? I cannot conceive of holy joy unaccompanied with godly sorrow. Confession of sin should make up one half of our lives. Only acknowledge your iniquity. And when we remember that we have to do with One so willing and so able to pardon, it becomes then a mingled feeling of pleasure and pain. By confessing sin we gather strength to resist it; thereby the enemy of our souls is foiled, the conscience is kept tender, the heart is sanctified, and the blood of Jesus becomes increasingly precious. Let us constantly flee to the cleansing fountain!
Oh, what a pleasant prospect is before us, almost in full view! Jesus is at hand, and if He does not soon come to us, we shall soon go to Him, our best and dearest Friend. Oh, to see His face, once so wearied and careworn, traced with sorrow and with grief; and that because our sins were laid upon Him. But now resplendent with glory; His countenance is beaming with ineffable delight upon His redeemed, blood bought family, rescued from the power of hell, death, and the grave. Can we conceive of anything to equal such a scene? The Bridegroom rejoicing over his bride, saints singing, angels admiring. Endeavor to realize this, dear friend. Take your walks in the good land, flowing with milk and honey.
A throne of grace, with a broken heart for sin, and a pardoning Savior, is a verdant spot in this wilderness! Nothing in this fading world can equal it!
The more we have to do with Christ, the more we shall know of His excellences, His sympathy, and His exquisite, boundless love!May we not be satisfied to know Jesus in theory only, but in our soul’s sweet experience.
There is no uncertainty with God. His thoughts of love towards us have been from everlasting to everlasting. He loved us when we were wandering far from Him, and far from happiness. He loved us when we knew Him not. He loved us out of Satan’s kingdom into the kingdom of grace, and He will love us into the kingdom of glory. Our doubts and fears may harass us, but they can make no alteration in His eternal purposes.
Precious friend, look fully at Jesus. Look no longer to your own weak, sinful heart. We are to look for comfort only to Christ. The bitten Israelites looked at once and directly to the brazen serpent, and were healed. Oh the precious fountain for sin and uncleanness! I am obliged to come again and again to it.
I am fighting on my way, often sorrowing and rejoicing at the same time; mourning for my sins, while I can and do rejoice that Christ has made an all sufficient atonement for all my sins; past, present, and to come; which, while it humbles me in the dust of self abhorrence, makes me increasingly long to be like Him.
We have but a brief space left to show our love to Christ. Let us work for Him, live for Him, live to Him, and look forward to living with Him.
I would like to hear if all is well with you, and if you are making progress heavenward, homeward, and if Jesus is increasingly precious to your soul.
We do not know how soon we may be called to render in an account to God? One step and we are there, in the very presence of a holy, heart searching Jehovah. Is there anything upon earth of equal importance to this?
Worldly prosperity is unfavorable soil for the true Christian to grow in. It stupefies the soul.
What a grief it is to me to see those professing Christ, and yet living for the world. Oh that this evil might be subdued in me!
Why should our grace droop, and languish, and die, when we can repair to the Fountain of living water, at all times and under all circumstances? Oh, the blessing of having such an Almighty Friend in glory, waiting to be gracious to us, whose power is infinite in heaven and on earth; and whose love, like Himself, is from everlasting to everlasting!
True religion is essentially experimental in its nature. True Christianity is nothing less than the life of Jesus dwelling in the soul of the believer. But Christian experience varies; it may be more strongly developed in some individuals than in others. One believer may present a more robust type of this essential Christianity than another.
What, oh what shall I render unto You for Your wondrous goodness and patience towards me? Nothing have I to render. I am poor and needy, and dependent upon You moment by moment.
How intricate is often the believer’s way! So hedged up that he cannot discern a single step before him. All is dark. He here and there goes too often to the creature for counsel, and perhaps for sympathy, but finds all broken cisterns. But Jesus is at hand; a Fountain of living waters, ever ready to impart all comfort, wisdom, and direction. But, oh, how slow to approach this Fountain! How base and ungrateful the heart, and wretched the unbelief that still lurks within, ever leading us away from Him who is a present help in every time of need. Take up your rest, O my soul, in Him who has loved you with an everlasting love, and will love you unto the end!
Surely I have seen an end of all perfection, both in myself and in others. But, oh, there is One, and only one, and He is perfect. The goodness, the patience, the loving kindness of Jesus surpasses our conceptions! Eternity only can unfold it to us, and we shall be even there learning it out forever and ever!
We must go in all our helplessness to Him who has said, “Without Me you can do nothing.” We must cast ourselves at the feet of Him who is watching over us with a loving, sleepless eye!
The Lord has tried you of late, and I do feel anxious to speak a word of comfort to you in this affliction. Those whom He loves He invariably tries. The graces of the Spirit are thus brought into holy exercise. Jesus is thereby honored, and our souls ascend a higher round in that ladder that reaches from earth to heaven. We must sit at His feet, and believe that He does all things well. What we don’t know now, we shall know hereafter. The Judge of all the earth must do right. Soon we pass away to our heavenly inheritance, and then we shall see all the way He led us through the wilderness was the right way, and that not one trial or cross could have been dispensed with. Oh, let us cling closer and closer to Him than ever. Let us make Him our all in all. May the constraining love of Christ, the eternal love of the Father, and the sanctifying love of the Holy Spirit, rest upon you, guide, and bless you!
I am near my eternal home. Jesus is very precious, and His presence is sensibly with me. I live now more as a little helpless infantupon Christ, than ever I did in my long life.
Dear friend, this is our season for the trial of faith, and every fresh trial, under the loving eye of Jesus, and sanctified by the indwelling Spirit, is like a fresh gale wafting us nearer and nearer to our port; to the place He has gone to prepare for us. All these things work together for our prosperity of soul. We will never think, when we get heaven, that we had one trial too many. We shall see that we could not have done without one of them, for all were so many needful lessons to instruct us in a journey through a wilderness full of temptation. Infinite wisdom has chosen them for us. I know your trials are often great, but the loving eye of Jesus is upon you, and your name is deeply engraved upon His heart. Whom He loves He loves unto death.
The eye, the all searching eye of God is upon us every moment!
It is Satan robed as “an angel of light,” not Satan appearing as a fiend of darkness, that we have most to dread.
I fear we have too little contact with Christ Himself. We do not sufficiently make him our personal friend; walking with him, talking with him, confiding in him as we would with the dearest personal friend of our hearts. And yet this is our high and precious privilege. “This is my Friend,” should be the language of every believer, as he points to, and leans upon, Christ.
O there is no school like God’s school; for “who teaches like Him?” And God’s highest school is the school of trial. All his true scholars have graduated from this school. “Who are these who are clothed in white? Where do they come from? These are the ones coming out of the great tribulation. They washed their robes in the blood of the Lamb and made them white.” Rev. 7:13-14. Ask each spiritually, deeply taught Christian where he attained his knowledge; and he will point you to God’s great university; the school of trial.
The Lord has laid His heavy hand upon you. All is in love. May He open your eyes to see it. He loves us too well to afflict us with out a ’needs be’. When we get above, we shall see how needful the chastening of Him who loves us, for our preparation for the full enjoyment of that place He has gone to prepare for us. Oh, what a change! from earth to heaven! From a suffering bed to a mansion of glory! You are the sufferer; but dry your tears, for home will come at last, and may we receive from His own loving lips a “Well done, good and faithful servant; enter into the joy of your Lord.” I feel for you, and pray you may be sustained and comforted by God. Jesus is very near. He is ordering all things for you. He does not willingly afflict us. It is to wean us from a dying world and from ourselves. We too much grovel here. The Lord sees the encroachment of earthly ties, which leave but half for Him. Let us, then, gird up the loins of our mind, and make a fresh start for heaven. A crown of glory awaits us! Jesus, the very same Jesus, is on the throne, as full of love, compassion, and sympathy as when a man of sorrows here upon earth. Oh, the glory that awaits the Christian! By all these painful dispensations He is preparing us for the full enjoyment of that glory; glory begun here; glory increasing through out eternity. This world is not worth a thought; and we should ever bear in mind it is but a passage to a better world. Let this fresh trial, like a stormy gale, drive you nearer and still nearer to Jesus. Make Him your all in all.
We must all pass through much tribulation before we enter the kingdom He has gone to prepare for us. Let us, then, take up the cross, and follow hard after Him. A little while, and we shall be there. Sweet thought! Oh, let us try and realize it. Heaven is not so far off as we imagine. But as I draw nearer and nearer, heaven seems to open with increasing attraction; and the prospect of seeing Jesus, that same Jesus that bore all my sins on the accursed tree, fills me with joy unspeakable and full of glory.
There is nothing too small to carry to Jesus. Abroad, at home, in company, or in the street, lift up your heart, and tell Him all you feel and all you desire. Aim to have constant communion with Him. Let Him not be long out of your sight. Oh! to have to do with Jesus and with Jesus only! Do not make up your mind to do anything before you ask counsel from Him. The heart is deceitful, and will lead us astray. Let us be very jealous over this inward foe, and only consult our dearest and best Friend. Oh, He is an ocean of love! Nothing but love is in His dear heart towards His precious children.
We live at too great a distance from Christ. He wants us to experience more of His sympathy, His boundless love, His nearness to, and His oneness with, us.
One of the delightful employments of heaven will be to trace back the way the Lord led us safely, in spite of ourselves, through the wilderness world. And then shall we see how needful was every cross, and trial, and pain, and dispensation, with which our precious Jesus saw fit to exercise us.
Be of good cheer, God has sent your trial. It is a messenger of love; nothing but eternal, boundless, never ending love. God is love, an ocean of love, nothing but love. His tender, loving eye is upon you, and His loving heart is towards you at this moment. See what a God and Father He is. Soon we shall all pass away, and be done with sorrow and sin forever. A thousand times have I thanked the Lord for all my trials and afflictions. I would not have been without them for worlds. They have been messengers of boundless love and mercy to me. I do trust this will be your rich experience. Your friend and sister in tribulation.
The Lord has taken His suffering child out of all her troubles, to her happy, happy home! Long had she been refining in the furnace, and preparing for that place Jesus had gone to take possession of for her. Not one pain did she suffer, or sorrow did she feel, but had in it the tenderest love of Jesus. All was needful. He was preparing her for the full enjoyment of His presence. Shall not the Judge all the earth do right? She has made her escape from a world of sin and trouble, and from a body, not only of sin and death, but of suffering, and long a clog to her soul. She has broken loose from her cage, and is with Jesus! Oh, the happiness to look upon Him; to behold Him in all His unveiled beauties; to see Him face to face! I rejoice that she is at last released! I covet her joy.
There is nothing that can take place towards a child of God but what our heavenly Father designs, in infinite love, for our spiritual advancement, and His own glory. We are to submit to His holy will, and believe that there was a ’needs be’ for it. The Lord loves His children too well to lay upon them the weight of a feather, without an absolute necessity, and without some wise and loving purpose. God deals wisely and graciously with us in all His varying dispensations. If tears could be shed in heaven, we would weep that we ever mistrusted His goodness in His dealings towards us. Let us, in this world of trial, cling close to Him, and lean more upon Him as little helpless children. Keep a constant communion with Him. Tell Him all you feel, or wish, or need.
I would not have been without my sad trials for ten thousand worlds. What would I have known of the wondrous, tender, and unchanging love of Jesus, but for my deep trials?
This poor world is but a wilderness, and, like the children of Israel, we must pass through it to reach our heavenly home. Live much in holy contemplation of the glory that awaits you. This will enable you to bear the bitter trials that daily cross your path. Carry all your difficulties, small and great, at once to Jesus. His ear is open to your requests, and he will make every crooked path straight, and rough path smooth. We are on a journey, and how soon it terminates!
Oh, how awfully blind are many who call themselves Christians! Religious formalism is the bane of thousands! They say prayers, but never pray. They know nothing of the great change from nature to grace; nothing of the new birth. They have no personal, spiritual acquaintance with Christ; nothing of real conversion. Is it not melancholy to see so many, whom we love, yet living in the gall of bitterness and in the bond of iniquity, while we know that, dying in that state, they are lost forever?
We are so prone to look to ’the creature’; and then He takes our prop away, that we may lean upon Him and upon Him only. Oh, let it be our aim, our chief business, and the desire of our souls, to walk humbly and closely with God! In a little while and we pass away; and oh, how we shall wonder at ourselves that we could have allowed any one thing to divert our minds, even for a moment, from the great, the overwhelming concerns of eternity!
There is not a single truth in God’s word which will be of any avail to us, but as it is wrought out in the experience of the soul, by the power of the Holy Spirit, through the varying dispensations of Divine Providence. Thus the Israelites were led through many trials and difficulties in the wilderness, to show them what was in their hearts. We are such dull scholars; and I often wonder and wonder again at the patience of a good, gracious, and unchanging God towards us. He varies His dealings, that He might teach us our nothingness, weakness, and total helplessness.
The kingdom of God does not come with observation. The world knows nothing of what is passing within the soul of the believer; the mighty work which the Spirit is carrying silently on. The hidden evil is revealed; his soul, in sorrow, flees to Jesus; the Comforter applies the blood to the accusing and disturbed conscience; the throne is erected; the King reigns supreme; the soul rejoices; all this transpires in the believer without any outward sign, and the world knows it not. And so the kingdom of God’s grace in the soul works secretly and silently, and without observation.
I thank Him for the throne of grace, where I can relieve my burdened heart, and tell Him all, keeping nothing back, good or bad. Oh, is not this a mighty privilege? The God of heaven, the Creator of all worlds, stooping in love to ‘simple dust’!
It is a perilous and an awful thing to be satisfied with a form of godliness, without the vital, saving power. May the Lord lead you into an ’experimental knowledge’ of Jesus. No other knowledge is worth having.
How tender and gentle are the dealings of our good and gracious Father to His child! Oh, how wisely He acts in all His various dealings with His children! He gives no account of any of His matters, but acts as a sovereign on His throne.
How often does covetousness transform itself into the shape of prudence, and thereby we are likely to be deceived. Oh for stronger faith to live above the policy and precepts of this poor dying world!
Every doctrine, as well as every word of God, is only effectually profitable as it is worked out by the trying providence of God in the soul’s deep experience. Head knowledge will not do. Hearing with the outward ear does but little for the soul, enables it to make no progress towards heaven, or unfolds to us the tenderness of Christ, or the real character of God. The truth as it is in Jesus is more known in one deep trial than a year of smooth sailing. Worldly prosperity is but indifferent soil for the Christian to grow in. It rather stunts the soul.
Jesus is the very same; as full of compassion, sympathy, gentle, tender love, as when He walked the streets of Jerusalem. Is there not enough in a precious Jesus to engage all our thoughts and all our hearts? Let Him be our chief joy now. Let us keep very near to Him, and let no idol come between our soul and our best, nearest, and dearest Friend. The only way which a good and gracious God has pointed out to us in the Scriptures, in which we may be enabled to go on our heavenly journey, is by looking unto Jesus, not only when we first commence, but all our journey through.
I think, if there is a verdant spot in this wilderness world, it is where a poor believing sinner, with a contrite, broken heart, sits at the feet of Jesus. The sinner confessing, Jesus pardoning; the blood applied, and the conscience cleansed; all guilt removed, and the redeemed of the Lord rising from his knees, rejoicing in the Lord his God. Such have I often experienced, and therefore I commend it to all who are followers of the Lamb.
How many have passed into the eternal world fatally deceived by the error of baptismal regeneration! Baptized in infancy, they, were taught to view themselves as spiritually regenerated, as made the children of God; and they died, it is to be feared, with no more light and no more grace, believing they were safe. Terrible delusion!
Eternity and an immortal soul, surely, are solemn realities, and not to be sported with.
God is training us for our happy inheritance. Oh, let us try and live to it. What are the various sorrows of the way, compare with the glory that shall be revealed in us?
Jesus is everything to us! Without Him we are wretched, and with Him we have all that can be desired.
Heaven seems very near to me. It seems but a step and I am there, where there is no more sin, nor death, and where all tears are forever wiped away. This poor world is a valley of tears. I have been a child of sorrow, and yet not one trial too many have I had.
Aim to bring up your children for eternity.
Go to Jesus for all you need. Take Him as your true, your best, your only Friend. There is not another like Him. Take Him as your brother born for adversity. The oftener you go to Him, the more welcome you will be, and the better acquainted. Do not first go to an arm of flesh, and then to Christ. But go to Christ first, before you make up your mind as to the course you should take.
This poor dying, disappointing world, at best is but a cheat, promising much, but performing little! Oh, what a world is this! What a mercy that we have a Friend who rules over all, and who has said, “I am the Lord, and I do not change.”
I have often thought of the goodness, kindness, and tender sympathy of God, that though man had sinned and was at enmity with his Creator, Benefactor, and Friend, so that the ground was cursed for his sake; there should yet be so much in this world to comfort, to alleviate, and delight; so much still lingering of its pristine beauty to regale and please. And if this world is still so attractive, so lovely to the eye and pleasing to the senses; what must that world be which infinite love has gone to prepare for the redeemed and pure spirits designed to inhabit it!
I need to learn to live day by day, trusting God for the daily supplies of His grace, and for the leadings of His providence; leaving the morrow in His own blessed hand, who knows how to give and when to withhold.
Walk in the fear of God, and you need fear nothing else.
Never undertake a cause without kneeling down and asking the Lord for wisdom and grace. If Solomon felt it needful to do this, well may you. Christ says, “Without Me you can do nothing.”
Did you but more know the depth of that love that is in the heart of Jesus you would never be reluctant to go to Him for all you needed.
Let us keep our eye and our hearts upon our blessed home.
Earth is but a stage erected as our passage to the place Jesus has gone to prepare for us.
What a place must that be! which Infinite power and love has engaged to provide!
Oh, let us not lose sight of heaven for a moment.
How prone are we to allow our minds and hearts (treacherous hearts!) to become entangled with the baubles of a dying world. No wonder Christ exhorted us to watch and pray.
Heaven is our home; our happy home.
We are but strangers and pilgrims here.
Try and realize it.
Let us keep ourselves ready to enter with Him to the marriage supper of the Lamb. In a little while, and we shall see Him, not as the ‘Man of sorrows,’ but the ‘King in His beauty.’
Then let us fight against earth and all its false attractions, for it passes away.
Oh the comfort of being one with Jesus, who is the widow’s Husband and the Father of the fatherless! Take Him now just as He is, and He will comfort your widowed heart, draw you sensibly near to Himself, and sooth your bereaved spirit as the dearest earthly friend could not. You need care for nothing now, since God is the Father of the orphan, to whom you may go with all your anxieties and concerns on their account. Fain would I comfort you with the comfort wherewith / have been comforted of God. God is love, all love, His heart is an ocean of love. One sigh, one look, the faintest desire after Jesus and His salvation, based upon a believing acceptance of the promise, “Him that cometh unto Me I will in no wise cast out” is quite enough to comfort us, and to give the hope of meeting where there is no separation throughout an endless eternity. God be praised for the hope He has given us, and for the earnest in our own souls of the glory that awaits us in a blessed hereafter. Cheer up. “A Father of the Fatherless, and a Judge of the widow is God in His holy habitation."
“my Dearest Mother, October22, 1810.
“… Thank God you are all well; but above all things, I desire to thank and bless His holy name that you and Bella are so wonderfully brought to know yourselves, and to know Him whom to know is life everlasting. Blessed be God, who passes by so many, and who has designed to look upon us who were lying as others, dead in sin. Infinite in sovereignty, infinite in goodness, infinite in power! why He passes by some and calls others, is only known to Himself; but there is a time coming when we shall know even as we are known, and be enabled to see that He acts consistently with his goodness and mercy. All we have to do in this vale of tears is to press forward to the glorious prize He has placed in . our view, looking continually to Jesus, trusting not to our own strength, but waiting in humble dependence upon Him for all our sufficiency to carry us on, and to enable us to ‘hold but unto the end. He that has promised is true and faithful to His word. Oh, that we may be found like His beloved handmaiden of old, sitting at His feet. His eye is ever upon His dear, dependent flock; He knows all our need, and has promised to supply it. But for these things He will be inquired of. It is at a throne of grace Jesus makes Himself known to His saints, comforts them, revives their drooping spirits with a view of those blessings He basin store for them. This world is not our home—we look for a better. His people are pilgrims here on earth, and generally are a poor and afflicted people. They have not their portion here as thousands have,—their portion is to come. Their names are written in the book of life, and were written before the foundation of the world. They are as dear to Him as the apple of His eye. Then what have we to fear? nothing; but everything to hope. Blessed be God who sent His only Son to pay our debt, to rescue us from the power of Satan, to cleanse us from all our guilt, to clothe our souls with His righteousness, and thereby give us a rightful claim to a crown of glory. Blessed be that dear Son who condescended to come amongst us, to assume our nature, and to do for us what we had no power to do for ourselves. And blessed be the Holy Spirit, who in infinite mercy forms and prepares us for the heavenly kingdom. I am delighted to find dear B has such clear views of the doctrine of the Atonement. And oh, that they may reach her heart, and influence all her thoughts, words, and actions. My last letter will have informed you that the children’s illness was occasioned by the measles, and my precious husband’s from a rupture of a blood-vessel in the lungs. These things altogether, have been a severe trial to mind and body, but I have been in a most wonderful manner supported under them. I have gone through enough to kill a dozen women stronger than myself; but the Lord has fulfilled the promise, and given me strength according to my day.
“On Monday evening I heard a very popular minister, who was to preach at a chapel in Lincoln’s Inn Fields. I waited some time until the doors were opened, and then obtained a seat near the pulpit. But although the place was large, every part was densely crowded, and people standing in the aisles. The preacher was Alexander Fletcher, from Scotland, a young man of about twenty-two. But oh, how zealous, fervent, and inexpressibly great and sweet in explaining the glad tidings of salvation! His discourse was addressed to children particularly, and he has such uncommon power in directing and fixing the attention of both old and young, that I do not believe the eyes of either were off him during the whole service. This good steward of Jesus preaches almost every evening in some part or other of London. Oh, when I see such servants of the Lord spending their strength, their lives, their all for God, and counting it nothing so that they might win Christ, I look at myself and mourn over my unprofitableness, and desire to lie low m the dust. This good, zealous man of God, though followed by crowds, appears humble and lowly, like his blessed Master. Oh, my dear mamma, how I long to have you with me, where you may hear the blessed gospel preached in a thousand places. How precious it is in the ear of the redeemed! It is the soul’s food, and we grow lean and lukewarm without it. May every covenant blessing attend you, is the prayer of your affectionate daughter, “M. W.”
Forever with the Lord! Amen; so let it be, Life from the dead is in that word, 'Tis immortality.
Here in the body pent, Absent from him I roam, Yet nightly pitch my moving tent A day's march nearer home.
My Father's house on high, Home of my soul, so near, At times, to faith's far-seeing eye Thy golden gates appear!
Yet clouds will intervene, And all my prospect flies, Like Noah's dove, I flit between Rough seas and stormy skies.
And the clouds depart, The winds and waters cease, While sweetly o'er my gladdend heart Expands the bow of peace.
In darkness as in light, Hidden alike from view, I sleep, I wake, as in his sight, Who looks all nature through.
Forever with the Lord! Father, if 'tis thy will, The promise of that faithful word Even here to me fulfil.
Be thou at my right hand, Then can I never fail, Uphold thou me, and I shall stand, Fight, and I must prevail.
Knowing as I am known, How shall I love that word! And oft repeat before the throne, Forever with the Lord!
Forever with the Lord! Amen; so let it be, Life from the dead is in that word, 'Tis immortality.
—Octavius Winslow
Gently, Lord, oh, gently lead us Through vale of tears, Though thou’st decreed us, Till our last great change appears.
As temptation’s darts assail us, Or in devious paths we stray Let thy goodness never fail us, Lead us in thy perfect way
In the hour of pain and anguish, In the hour when death draws near Suffer not our hearts to languish, Suffer not our souls to fear.
As this mortal life is ended, Bid us in thine arms to rest, Till, by angel bands attended, We awake among the blest.
Then, oh, crown us with thy blessing, Through the triumphs of thy grace; Then shall praises never ceasing Echo through thy dwelling-place.
—Octavius Winslow
And when we remember that we have to do with One so willing and so able to pardon, it becomes then a mingled feeling of pleasure and pain. By confessing sin we gather strength to resist it; thereby the enemy of our souls is foiled, the conscience is kept tender, the heart is sanctified, and the blood of Jesus becomes increasingly precious. Let us constantly flee to the cleansing fountain!
I see myself more and more, every hour, a poor sinner, unworthy of the least crumb that falls from the Master’s table. But I see, at the same time, Jesus a great Savior, divinely able, and most lovingly willing, to save the chief of sinners, even me. No one can tell how this thought fills my heart with contrition, and my eyes with tears.
Say unto my soul, I am thy Salvation.—Psalm Xxxv. 3.
What poor creatures we are, and what a mercy that we have the prospect of soon breathing a different atmosphere, always healthy, and invigorating, and life-giving to our souls. O how great the happiness of being able to look forward to this state of things with a degree of certaintythat excludes all doubt. What peace and joy does this impart to the believing soul; better far than all the riches and honour of this poor dying world. Let us not rest until, at the feet of Jesus, we are enabled to say, “My soul is saved: God in Christ has spoken peace.” Let us take nothing for .granted. With respect to Eternity, the concerns of our soul should be reduced to a moral certainty. We should be quite sure. And O when He speaks to us, we know it. There is no voice like the still small voice of the Spirit. Let us go again and again, until we get this blessing. Then we shall say, as the woman of Samaria, “Now we believe, not because of thy saying: for we have heard Him ourselves, and know that this is indeed the Christ, the Saviour of the world.” I think I could go upon my knees and entreat souls not to rest until they find Jesus.
We live in a dangerous world,—a world lying in wickedness; and when we remember what a treacherous foe dwells in our bosom, ever prompting us to evil, we need cry mightily to God to save us from Satan and from our own selves. I have lately had a very sweet humbling view of my own hateful self, and a soul-melting view of the wonderful and over-whelming goodness of God in loving and saving one so vile.
It is uncertain as yet how the matter will be settled, but it does not trouble me. I have placed it in the Lord’s hands. I trust all will be arranged for our good and for His glory. The believer is not his own; we belong to Christ, and all that concerns us He will arrange in His own most loving way. What concerns us equally concerns Him. Why then should we be careful for anything? How close the connection between Christ and the saint, and yet how little do we enter into the blessedness of the relation! How lightly we think of it. How much happier should we be did we see the exalted state and the mighty privilege of a believer in Jesus. Despised and thought but little of by the world, and yet dear to Christ and beloved by God Himself. This, so far from creating pride, rather humbles and lays us low at His feet, while it dissolves the heart into deep contrition for sin. And shall we sin that grace may abound? God forbid! When the believer is brought to see that God is in every circumstance, small and great, connected with the saints, it contents and quiets the mind, and allays all that discomposed and worried it.
That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ—I Peter i. 7.
FOR a Christian not to have something to say for the Lord, indicates a low state of grace in his soul. Thus I may say that Jesus is most precious, and eternal things appear of greater importance to me than ever. Sin appears most hateful, and conformity to Christ above all things most desirable. I long and pant after holiness, and mourn that I am so vile. I dread more than ever to be left to myself; I feel that I can trust none but Christ. God’s goodness and great tenderness melt me into deep contrition, and humble me in the dust. I say often to myself, How can I sin against so good, so gracious, and loving a Father? How is it that the world hates me so little? Is it not because I am so much like itself, and so little like Christ? The world will love its own, but cannot love what is contrary to itself. “The world hath hated them, because they are not of the world, even as I am not of the world.” O for a closer walk with God! How blessed it is to walk by faith: I am certain it is the right road to glory; no other would do us equal good. Faith in Jesus brings countless blessings to the soul, and glory to God the Father. No wonder then that He tries the little we have, that it may be increased and grow, that every other grace might grow with it. We never should value a throne of grace as we ought to do, if our faith were not tried. Let us hold fast our confidence in God, for He is our Friend, unchanging in all His purposes of the tenderest mercy and love. If He has given His dear Son for us, will He, can He, withhold anything else that is really for our good? His love for us is as if He had not another in the whole universe to care for. Be of good courage, for Christ is yours, and all things are His.
The day the telegraph arrived was a day forever etched in the mind of Mary Winslow. Having recently arrived in New York with her ten children, while awaiting the arrival of her husband, the Winslow's infant daughter died a sudden and unexpected death. Before this child was even buried, Mary received the devastating word of her husband's death. "At the very moment I was weeping over the corpse of a darling child," Mary wrote in a letter, "I received the intelligence that a still heavier calamity had befallen me, and that God had written me a widow indeed!"
Mary Forbes was born in 1774 to Dr. and Mrs. Forbes. Miraculously on several occasions during her childhood, her life was spared. One time, while accompanying her parents on a voyage, a terrible storm bore down on their vessel. As she and her mother sought a place of safety below deck, Mary noticed that a small piece of lighted candle wick was almost burnt to the bottom of the candle.
Fearing that the barrel on which it was setting would begin to burn, she jumped from her mother's lap and quickly removed it. Only then did her mother (who was so absorbed in their impending doom) realize that the barrel about to be ignited was a cask of gunpowder. Recalling this event years later, Mary said, "Had I not removed it at that moment, the vessel and all on board must instantly have been blown to atoms."
An only child, Mary married Lieutenant Thomas Winslow at the age of seventeen. Together, the Winslows had everything that could be desired. One night, after returning home from a ball, Mary lay in bed thinking about "the glitter, the music, the dance, the excitement, the attention, and the pleasure." With a heavy heart she whispered to herself, "Is this all?" It was then that she came under spiritual conviction and found deliverance while pleading the promise, "Ask and ye shall receive." Graciously, the Lord used these words, "I am thy salvation" to bring redemption to her soul.
Now in a strange land, grieving the loss of a child as well as her beloved husband, Mary nearly sank beneath her load of suffering. How was she to raise such a large family alone? The weight of the souls of her eight sons and one remaining daughter continually rested upon her shoulders until one night when she could not bear the load anymore.
Years later, she recounted the events of that night to her children:
One whole night I passed in wrestling prayer—a night ever, ever memorable. All in the house but your widowed mother were asleep. I paced my room in wrestling supplication for help and comfort from him who alone could impart it. In vain I sought to grasp a divine promise; all seemed enshrouded in the deepest gloom. Thus was that night of woe spent, the dawn of the day finding me still wrestling with God.
It was then a voice spake to my innermost soul, so blessed I could not mistake it. Its promise was so divine, its comfort so real, its assurance so explicit, I was left in no doubt whose voice it was. "I will be a Father to thy children," were the words spoken. I felt in an instant that God was with me—with me in my room. I felt assured that God had seen my sorrow, and had bowed the heavens and come down Himself to comfort it. I arose and fell upon my knees, and in adoring gratitude poured out my heart before Him. My room, before a scene of deepest anguish, was now the very gate of heaven to my soul. I felt assured that God would not only be a Father to my fatherless ones but also a Husband to their widowed mother.
From that day forward her heavenly Father became her husband and friend. "I would not often tell the dearest friend in the world what passes in my mind; but I can disclose it all to Jesus!" Mary would often say.
As soon as any trouble would arise, Mary would fall on her knees and pour out her heart to her heavenly Father.
This wonderful promise also gave Mary a renewed zeal as she daily instructed her nine children. Gathering them around her, morning and evening, she spoke of God's faithfulness and care, imploring them to put God first in their life.
Little did Mary realize that the great trials that she had endured throughout her young life were a means of the Lord grooming her for a life of service. Her pen became a means of medicine for many a soul as she was given much insight to minister to the needs of others. Whether a word of rebuke or sweet drops of encouragement to a discouraged friend, Mary poured out her life ministering to all she came in contact with.
To a new Christian she writes, "Now you are called to glorify Him in body, soul, and spirit. You belong not to yourself, but to Jesus. Say to Him, 'Lord, what wilt thou have me to do?'"
To one going through a trial she pens, "Dear friend, make much of your trials—they are treasures and blessings in disguise—they quicken to prayer. Pray in the trial, pray over the trial, and pray after the trial, that you may not lose the good it is designed to impart."
To a brother in need: "Temptation is a test, tribulation is a discipline, trial is a school, all essential to our perfect education for eternity."
To another she comforts, "When anything tries me, and my heart sinks, the moment I think of God the burden is either lightened or removed. And when trouble comes, small or great, we then shelter beneath His wings, or nestle within His bosom, and feel the very throbbings of His heart."
To a friend she exhorts, "Confession of sin is one of the holiest and healthiest exercises of the renewed soul. To go to Jesus conscious of failure in thought, word, and deed is our precious privilege. Ten minutes at the feet of Jesus, in a full view of His love, while confessing sins and shortcoming—sins we know already pardoned—yet sorrowing that we should ever grieve One who so tenderly loves us, is a happiness I would not exchange for millions of worlds."
What a treasure of writings we have because Mary used the talents God gave her. In reading her letters, woman today are drawn closer to Christ being inspired to follow after the footsteps of this dear sister. She fulfilled her duty as mother and teacher to her children, while also profoundly impacting thousands of lives. What a high calling we also have to use the talents we are given!
Are we "blooming where we are planted"? Instead of bitterness with the lot the Lord gave Mary, she turned her trials into pleading and then resting on God's promises. "We cannot ask too much," she says. "Ask anything in my name, and I will do it. There He sits to fulfill His own promise; and the oftener we go to Him, the more welcome we are."
All of Mary's nine children came to faith in the Lord; three became ministers of the gospel. As Mary reached her final days on this earth, she still tried to continue her correspondence. In her last letter written, she wrote:
Oh, dear young friend, I have been very ill; my happy home almost in sight! Make Jesus your chief FRIEND, and look more to the things that are not seen and eternal. I can write no more, sitting in bed supported by pillows. Make sure of heaven. You may make many mistakes as it respects this poor world, but, I beseech you, make no mistake as it respects a vast eternity.
So Mary entered her last days on earth. Some of her last recorded words are a resonance of her life on earth: "Keep close intimacies with Jesus. We must live upon Christ, and we must die upon Christ."
Mary longed to see her dear Savior. As death came upon her, with her final breaths she rapidly repeated the words, "I see Thee! I see Thee! I see Thee!" Her life lived so full of service to her dear Savior finally ended in sight, only to hear the blessed words, "Well done good and faithful servant!"
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Read more from Mary Winslow and many other godly women in Donna's book, "Seasons of the Heart: A Year of Devotions from One Generation of Women to Another"