Family: Parents

Family: Parents

Deficiency
A mother made an appointment with her young child's pediatrician. She said she had noticed that he had eaten dirt on several occasions.
To the doctor, she said, "I've always heard that if a child eats dirt, there is some deficiency. Do you think his dirt-eating indicates a lack of something?"
The doctor replied, "Yes-very definitely. A lack of supervision!"

Teach Your Child Integrity
In ancient China, the people desired security from the barbaric hordes to the north, so they built the great Chinese wall. It was so high they knew no one could climb over it and so thick that nothing could break it down. They settled back to enjoy their security. During the first 100 years of the wall's existence, China was invaded three times. Not once did the barbaric hordes break down the wall or climb over the top. Each time they bribed a gatekeeper and then marched right through the gates. The Chinese were so busy relying upon the walls of stone that they forgot to teach integrity to their children. A Dollar for Your Child
"Bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord" (Ephesians 6:4).
His name was Rusty, and he was barely 11 years old. He still had the look of a little boy. He was homeless, not old enough to be hardened, but certainly old enough to be frightened. His mother lived in town, but she didn't want him.
Rusty lived in the alley behind the shop of one of our church members. He slept in a cardboard box.
In an effort to get legal custody transferred to a Christian foster home, a little group met in an attorney's office: Rusty, Rusty's mother, the social worker, the attorney, and a pastor. They were severing all legal ties between Rusty and his mother ...and she did not care. The attorney carefully explained to Rusty's mother what was happening. He wanted to make sure that she understood that, in effect, she was losing all rights to her boy. Everyone was on the verge of tears-all except Rusty's mom.
Then came the question. The attorney worded it carefully, "Mrs. Brown, do you understand that when you sign this form, you are signing over all legal custody to the designated children's home?" She nodded her head in the affirmative. "Mrs. Brown, do you have any questions?" She had only one. "Do I get any money for this?" she asked. Everyone seemed dazed by this sledgehammer query. There was a long pause. Finally, 11-year-old Rusty pulled out his pocket book, extracted a dollar he had earned sweeping floors, and gave it to his mother. And she took it!
In less obvious ways, all over America, there are parents who are trading their parental responsibilities for the almighty dollar. Kids shouldn't have to grow up by themselves. Let me paraphrase: "What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world ...and loses his own children?"

What Do You Want Your Child To Be?
President Theodore Roosevelt had four sons. He was very proud when the first three sons announced their intention to join the military. But when his fourth son also decided to join the Army, the old Roughrider balked. "Not all my boys," he said to his wife. But she replied, "Ted, if you raised them as eagles you cannot expect them to fly like sparrows."
Every parent should have a dream for his or her children. Isaiah put it this way: "And all your sons will be taught of the Lord; and the well being of your sons will be great" (Isaiah 54:13). Three things to consider:
You announce what you want your child to be by what you teach him. It is not the church's responsibility to teach your children. It is yours as a mother and father. One man had been in a non-Sunday School congregation. When asked why, he said, "We did not object to classes. What we were afraid of was that parents would quit teaching at home." Was he right?
You announce what you want your child to be by the example you set. It is amazing how some parents put the ball games, camping trips, and fishing trips above attending worship, and then are amazed that their children leave the church. Someone wrote, "What you are thunders so loudly that I cannot hear what you say."
You announce what you want your child to be by the plans you make for him. Your children know if something is really important to you. Have you been saying from the time they started school, "Now make good grades so that someday you can go to college." They know how important that is to you. Have you encouraged them to be a preacher, a missionary, Bible school teacher, elder, etc.? By your plans, you have told them what you think is important. Will Your Children Go to Heaven?
One congregation found that where both parents were faithful to the Lord, including active interest in the local congregation's programs, 93 percent of the kids remained faithful. On the other hand, if only one of the parents was faithful, that figure dropped to 73 percent. Where the parents were only what we would call reasonably active in the Lord's work, only 53 percent of the young people maintained their faith.
Now here comes the shocker: In those cases where both parents attended only infrequently, the percentage of their children who remained faithful to the Lord dropped to 6 percent. Want your children to go to heaven? Then make certain you are leading them.

Parents Blunder When...
They give a child everything he wants.
They laugh at a child when he does or says something wrong.
They avoid the words "no" and "wrong."
They pick up after their children instead of giving them the responsibility of doing it.
They take the side of their children against neighbors, teachers, and other responsible adults.
They make every decision for their children.
They bail them out of every situation instead of letting them face the consequences of their mistakes.
They are over-protective, and do not allow their children to do normal and healthy things.
They let their children talk back to them.
They criticize others openly in front of their children.

Parents Provoke Their Children When...
They are over-protective.
They show favoritism toward one of their children.
They compare the accomplishments or abilities of their children.
They push achievement, aims, and goals, and in so doing, put un-due pressure on their children.
They do not reward or encourage their children.
They fail to allow childishness; that is, they do not understand that a child is a child, and not an adult.
They neglect their children's needs: spiritually, socially, intellectually and physically.
They nag their children.
They abuse them with hateful, ugly, and bitter words.
They punish them cruelly, or when the punishment is too harsh or severe for the mistake that was made.

Quality Time
I cringe every time I hear parents say that their schedules are really full, so they make a great effort to spend "quality time" with their children.
Think what this idea would look like if transferred to another area of life. What if a great basketball player decided, "I am pretty good now. I think I will just spend 15 minutes practicing my shooting today. It may not be very long, but it will be quality time." That approach would soon have him warming a bench. There is no quality time without investing a large quantity of time.