11 Attitude Towards Children
Attitude towards children:
What are children? How should we consider them? The Scriptures suggest four ideas:
First, that children are a GIFT FROM GOD. Consider these verses:
Psalms 127:3Behold, children are a gift of the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward. 4 Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one’s youth. 5 How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them;
Genesis 33:5Then Esau looked up and saw the women and children. "Who are these with you?" he asked. Jacob answered, "They are the children God has graciously given your servant."
Psalms 128:1Blessed is everyone who fears the LORD, who walks in his ways! 2 You shall eat the fruit of the labor of your hands; you shall be blessed, and it shall be well with you. 3 Your wife will be like a fruitful vine within your house; your children will be like olive shoots around your table. 4 Behold, thus shall the man be blessed who fears the LORD.
Since children are a gift, it is clear that we must not expect every marriage to be blessed by them. Children are not the purpose for marriage. Every marriage is to be characterized by love, unity, headship/submission, and perfection of each other, but not every marriage will produce children.
Also, if children are a gift from God, clearly they are not a curse. At some point - after struggling with rebellion or disobedience or crying - probably every parent feels his children are a curse. But the Bible clearly teaches that they are blessings, given to us in part for our benefit. The second idea suggested by Scripture is that children are LOVED BY GOD:
Mark 10:13People were bringing little children to Jesus to have him touch them, but the disciples rebuked them. 14 When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. 15 I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it." 16 And he took the children in his arms, put his hands on them and blessed them. The disciples thought Jesus was too busy to deal with children. They thought they were protecting him from distractions by keeping the children away. But Jesus is deeply angered by their action. He loved the children, and wanted to take them in his arms and bless them. Indeed, He holds up the children as examples for all of us, saying that we must receive God’s kingdom with the wonder, trust, and straightforwardness of a child. The third idea suggested by Scripture is that CHILDREN ARE ENTRUSTED TO US, THEY DO NOT BELONG TO US. As we have seen, children are gifts put into our care, but they are not our property. Consider this verse:
Isaiah 43:1But now thus says the LORD, he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: "Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine.
‘You are mine!’ God says this over all of creation, over all of humanity: ‘You are mine!’ Our children belong to God, not to us. We receive them as gifts and keep them in our homes for a few years; God blesses us through them in many ways; but they belong neither to us nor to our parents; they belong to God. We are stewards over them, with responsibilities to care for them, to cherish them, and to bring them up in the fear and admonition of the Lord. But they do not belong to us. The fourth idea suggested by Scripture is that CHILDREN ARE SINFUL; they are neither a blank slate, ready to become good or bad, nor are they basically good. David writes:
Psalms 51:5Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me. This is very important to remember. Although God gives these precious little ones to us as gifts, although they are blessings to us, they are not good. Like every human born in the normal way, every child inherits the sinfulness of our entire race. Without any encouragement from others, they will show pride, self-will, jealousy, anger, covetousness and every other sin. Left to themselves, they will show clearly their fallenness. So children are a precious gift from God, loved by Him and entrusted to our care for a period of time. But they, like all of us, are by nature children of wrath; they are infected with sin, and need godly upbringing to teach them the ways of the Lord.
How are we to treat these children? WE ARE TO TREAT CHILDREN THE WAY GOD TREATS US. Again and again the Bible uses the picture of a family to describe our relationship to God. God is our father, we are His children; we are brothers and sisters in Christ; we are heirs of God; He disciplines us the way a father disciplines his children. So we are to pattern our relationship to our children after God’s relationship to His people.
How does this work in practice? Luke 2:52 says that Jesus grew in wisdom and in stature, and in favor with God and men. We’ll use this as an outline of parents’ responsibilities toward their children: First, we’ll consider how we help our children to grow in wisdom and in favor with God as they learn of God’s love, God’s Word, and their need for Him. Second, we’ll examine how we help them grow in favor with men, as we train them in knowing how to relate to others, and in good habits of life. Finally, we will look at how we help them grow in stature, providing care and nourishment for them.