12 Growing in Wisdom and in Favor with God
Growing in Wisdom and in Favor with God The Bible is very clear about the parents’ responsibility to teach children the ways of the Lord. Consider these verses:
Deuteronomy 6:4Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. 5 Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. 6 These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. 7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9 Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.
Proverbs 22:6Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.
Ephesians 6:4Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction (or “admonition”) of the Lord.
Colossians 3:21Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.
Genesis 18:19For I have chosen him, that he may command his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD by doing righteousness and justice, so that the LORD may bring to Abraham what he has promised him." In Deuteronomy 6:1-25, the Israelites are commanded to impress God’s commands on their children. This is not an option that only a few especially spiritual parents are supposed to do, but a command to all of the people. And when are they to do this? Do you see the point of verses 7 to 9? They are to use all the normal activities of life as opportunities for teaching their children about God. Getting up in the morning and going to bed at night; walking or sitting; going into your house or out your gate; in every case you are to be discussing the things of the Lord with your children.
Note that this command is given to parents,notto the church. Certainly all of the Israelite community should be anxious to help each family raise its children, and certainly in the church today there are ways that we can help each other. But the primary responsibility for training children in the ways of the Lord falls upon the parents. If your children are not learning the Bible, if they are not learning the gospel message, if they are becoming disobedient and opposed to the things of the Lord, the responsibility to correct and train them lies not with the church but with you as parents. When should we begin to train our children in the ways of the Lord? Early, when they are still infants. Note these verses:
Proverbs 4:3When I was a boy in my father’s house, still tender, and an only child of my mother, 4 he taught me and said, "Lay hold of my words with all your heart; keep my commands and you will live.
2 Timothy 3:15and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.
Timothy know the Scriptures as an infant; the author of the proverb was taught when a young boy. By beginning very early, we impress our children when they are most impressionable with devotion to the Lord, delight in God’s character, reverence for the Word, and love for God’s people.
What methods should we use to accomplish this? How can we go about teaching our children? First and foremost, we must be good examples ourselves. Consider:
Jeremiah 32:38They will be my people, and I will be their God. 39 I will give them singleness of heart and action, so that they will always fear me for their own good and the good of their children after them.
Singleness of heart and action leads to fear of the Lord, which is of benefit to the people themselves AND to their children. When you are devoted to the Lord, when you treasure Him above everything in heaven and earth, when you are focused on Him and delighting to do His will, your children will see and learn. And they will receive great blessings from your example. But teaching by example, as important as it is, is not enough. We must also actively teach the Word to our children. Deuteronomy 6:4-9 again is very helpful: in every circumstance of our family life, we are to bring out the relevant truths of God’s Word. This implies having times of family devotion together; praying together; talking more informally about the Lord as circumstances warrant; and reading good books together that illustrate spiritual truths. The specific methods we use are likely to vary somewhat with the ages of our children. Even when they are infants, we can sing to them, pray over them (particularly when putting them to bed), and keep them near us as we read the Bible and pray ourselves. When children are a little older and able to walk around, we can teach them simple songs and encourage them to take part in family devotions. They are quite able to memorize Scripture at this age, particularly Scriptures set to music. Although they will usually have a difficult time sitting still, train them to do so - initially for short periods of time - while you read the Bible, and emphasize the importance of their paying attention. Tell Bible stories to them with expression and animation, showing them by your attitude that the Bible is interesting and exciting. Be consistent in setting aside some time each day, and show the child your own delight in the Lord. As children reach primary school age, times of reading the Bible can become longer. We have read through the entire Bible together over about 18 months of family devotions with children as young as 6 and 7. Sometimes it is helpful to provide paper and a pen, and encourage the children to draw a picture relevant to the story while you are reading. Encourage the children to ask questions, and take the time to explain difficult passages. Also, as soon as they are able to read, give them the gift of a Bible and encourage them to read short sections by themselves. As they grow and mature, encourage their regular reading according to a reading plan, and have them read aloud sections of Scripture during family devotions. Make use of a good program of Scripture Memorization. Psalms 119:11 says “I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.” The memorized Word is powerful in many ways, and children are better able than adults to memorize quickly when even a small amount of time is set aside for this purpose daily. In general, during these years we want to develop a delight and joy in God, a basic understanding of the thrust of the teaching of Scripture, and a growing hunger for the Word. As the Psalmist says, Psalms 119:103How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth!
Psalms 119:16I delight in your decrees; I will not neglect your word. That is the attitude we want to engender in our children: to delight in God’s Word, to find it sweet, and to desire to know it better and better.
Finally, pray for your children. First, pray for their salvation earnestly. Study them carefully, knowing what is going on in their lives, the trials they face and the struggles they have. Understand what strengths and weaknesses each child has, praying that they might grow in specific ways. See what sins they are prey to, and help them to avoid situations that lead them in to temptation. You can be the means of great spiritual growth in your children, through your leadership, example, teaching, and prayer. Serve them faithfully, and trust that God will work through you for the salvation and growth of these precious gifts.