December 4

"Make me to know my transgression and my sin." Jonah 13:23.

THE desire of knowledge seems natural to every man. The eye is not satisfied with seeing, nor the ear with hearing. But who wishes to know himself? Yet this is the knowledge we want. And there are two things concerning ourselves, which it argues a gracious state of mind to be willing to know—our mortality, and our depravity. A natural man turns away from both these. But says David, "Lord, make me to know mine end, and the measure of my days, what it is; that I may know how frail I am." And says Job, "Make me to know my transgression and my sin."

To explore the offences of others is a common wish. The information not only gratifies curiosity, but feeds malevolence, and furnishes the salt which seasons the conversation of the multitude. But says Job, "Make me to know my transgression and my sin."

And what does he wish to know concerning them? Their number; their guilt; their pollution; their aggravation.

And this knowledge he seeks from God. He alone can teach us to profit. Conviction is the work of his own Spirit. But he uses means; and shows us our transgression and our sin by the law and by the gospel, and by friends and enemies, and by the dispensations of his providence. But he does it gradually. We could not bear all the disclosure at once; it would drive us into distraction or despair. He therefore tells us to turn again into the chamber of imagery, and we shall see greater abominations. And this will serve to explain a case in the Christian's experience. He sometimes supposes himself to grow worse, because he grows wiser. He seems more sinful, because he is more enlightened: there is not more evil in him, but he sees more.

The effect of this knowledge, in the first instance, will be wonder. It calls us out of darkness into God's marvellous light. We are astonished that he has borne with us so long; we are astonished that we have acted such a foolish, such an ungrateful part; we are astonished that we did not see these things before, for they now strike us with all the force of evidence; and we are astonished that we see them now, since the thousands around us are blind still, and we were once blind also. But the result of the discovery will be as important and useful as it is surprising.

Self knowledge will produce self-annihilation. Self-vindication will be at an end, and we shall condemn ourselves. Self-complacency will be at an end, and we shall loathe ourselves. Self-dependence will be at an end, and we shall have no confidence in the flesh. "The lofty looks of man shall be humbled, and the haughtiness of men shall be bowed down, and the Lord alone shall be exalted in that day."

Hence will arise the endearment of the Saviour. How precious is the refuge now the danger is seen! How inviting the healing fountain appears now we feel our disease! For want of this sensibility, many read and hear of the Lord Jesus with indifference. How can it be otherwise? They that are whole need not the physician, but they that are sick. "The full soul loatheth a honey-comb, but to the hungry soul every bitter thing is sweet."

Hence also submission under afflictive dispensations. I will bear the indignation of the Lord, said the church, because I have sinned against him. Why, says Jeremiah, should a living man complain? Aaron's recollection of his making a calf just before kept him dumb in the loss of his sons. And David felt, from his adultery and murder, how well it became him to say, in Absalom's rebellion, Here I am; let the Lord do what seemeth him good. If a Christian has nothing criminal in particular to fix upon, he will see enough in his general temper and walk to keep him from thinking that God deals hardly with him. The wonder with him will be, not that his trials are so many, but so few—not that so many of his comforts are taken, but that any are left.

Another advantage will be habitual gratitude. The proud are never thankful. Heap whatever favors upon them, and what reward have ye? They think they deserve it. You are only doing your duty; you are doing justly, rather than loving mercy. But when we are humble, in the same proportion we shall be grateful. When we feel that we are not worthy of the least of all God's mercies, how thankful shall we be for the bread we eat, and the water we drink. What, then, shall we feel for the word of his truth, and the Son of his love?

Finally, as we are sensible of our depravity, we shall be tender towards others. Faithful dealing with ourselves will always be accompanied with candid dealing with our fellow-creatures. When we are much at home we cannot live much abroad. When we are employed in pulling the beams out of our own eyes, we shall not have much time for finding motes in those of others. If there be a difference between us and them, we shall ascribe it, when we know ourselves, to the mercy and grace of God. He has made us to differ, and we have nothing but what we have received. If we meet with things which are really wrong, and which we cannot deny, we shall not rejoice, but weep. And if a brother be overtaken in a fault, we shall restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering ourselves, lest we also be tempted.

Mandeville, in his fable of the bees, and Rochefoucault, in his maxims, and many infidel writers, have shown great acquaintance with the depravity of human nature. But they learned it from the devil, and the scholars felt like the teacher. They delighted in the subject; they loved to expose it. It was their interest to degrade and vilify human nature, to draw from it arguments for hatred, injury, selfishness, and distrust. But God teaches us the depravity of human nature principally through our own depravity. And with his teaching, he communicates his own Spirit. We therefore pity our common nature; we mourn over its dishonor; we pray for our fellow-sinners; we long to save them.