When Fathers Weep

The title is, When a Father Weeps, When a Father Weeps, The Power of Brokenness. And it's really part two to what I spoke on yesterday at the men's breakfast. And I'm sure many of you have not got to a devotional yet today.

And I wanna put the main chapter that this is kind of coming from, I'm not gonna go through verse by verse, because I chose to go a different direction, but I wanna put Psalm 51 up there. And I want this to sink into your heart, guys, men, women, anybody listening to this later. This is so powerful.

This is so powerful. David was caught in adultery and he killed the husband. That's pretty bad, in case you're wondering.

And this is the fruit of him being convicted and confronted. And I often wonder, what about if Nathan, the prophet, never went to him? Sometimes we need that conviction. We need that, and we get upset at first.

David didn't, but this is the product of that. So if anybody can pray this prayer, we can. We can hope for this.

Lord, have mercy upon me, O God, according to Your lovingkindness, according to the multitude of Your tender mercies. How beautiful. Blot out my transgressions, wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin.

For I acknowledge my transgressions. What does that mean? Why do we have a hard time doing that? That means I sinned, I've been wrong. Pride has come into my heart, but instead we blame shift and we don't acknowledge or we try to minimize it.

I've acknowledged my transgressions. And my sin is always before me against You, and You only have I sinned and done this evil in Your sight, that You may be found just when You speak and blameless when You judge. And then it goes on to say in verse 5, behold, I was brought forth in iniquity.

And this is one of the verses we use where we don't believe that people are born good and perfect and they become filled with sin later. The Bible's pretty clear. David says, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin my mother conceived me.

Behold, You desire truth in the inward parts, and in the hidden part You will make me to know wisdom. Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean. Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.

Make me hear joy and gladness that the bones You have broken may rejoice. Wait a minute, God breaks bones? I don't think these are physical bones. I think this is the pain internally that the bones you have broken, sometimes God might break you to make you.

Sometimes He might allow pain and suffering to humble you. If you're going through the fire, could it be that you lit the flame? And I can only say this because I'm a very broken man. God has been very gracious, but He's lovingly spanked me more times than I care to admit.

And He breaks, and He breaks. So God, thank You for those broken bones, that the bones You have broken may actually rejoice. So when God is breaking us from that, if we follow the right direction, joy can come and peace and gladness.

See, once a man has been broken by God, hopefully the broken leads to humility, not bitterness. And from that humility, that worship song is so true, out of the ashes I will arise because God takes that now broken thing and begins to rebuild it. And as He's rebuilding it, He's filled with joy and peace, just like the olives are broken for the olive oil, the petals of the flower are broken for the perfume.

God breaks things often in order to remake them. Hide Your face from my sins, Lord, and blot out my iniquities. Blot them out completely.

Created me a clean heart. Created me a clean heart. Many of you can pray that this morning.

God is just one prayer away. God is one prayer away from totally revamping and restoring and renewing your life. Stop fighting it.

Stop letting the defense attorney within govern your life. Stop letting pride and a stiff neck keep you from a deep work of God's Spirit. Created me, God, that clean heart.

Renew that right spirit within me. Do not cast away Your presence from me. And do not take Your Holy Spirit from me.

In case you don't know, that's Old Testament. Now as a believer, you have the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit doesn't come and go.

But we could easily say, I've been quenching and grieving the Spirit. And I feel the same way as David. Because when you quench the fire of God, you feel that the warmth has left.

And then as a result, what? Restored to me. Joy is restored after repentance. When our heart is right before God, return to me the joy of Your salvation.

Uphold me by Your generous Spirit. Then what will I do? I will teach sinners Your ways. And the sinners shall be converted to You.

Skipping to verse 17, the last one here. The sacrifices of God. You want to please God.

You want to give God something. You want to sacrifice, not in the Old Testament way, but in the New Testament, present your bodies as a living sacrifice. Holy to God.

Here's how you do it. God wants a broken spirit. A broken and contrite heart.

These, oh God, You will not cast away. And I might get to it later, but you tell me one example of Jesus in the New Testament. Just one, where He did not answer or help someone who cried out to Him.

Now He might lead them in. Hey woman, this food's for the children. Yeah, but Lord, even the little dogs eat from the crumbs from the master's table.

Oh, great is Your face. He might ignore, He might wait, but those who cry out to Jesus, maybe not healed, but they were saved, they were delivered, they were restored. The greatest need today is to be bold and broke and tough and tender.

We've gone from the greatest generation to the most passive. How's that happen so quick? Remember reading those World War II stories and they call it the greatest generation for a reason? Right, they're going into war at 18. Now many 18 are wearing dresses and lipstick and they can't do anything.

They have to live in their parents' basement. And we've gone from this incredible, incredible great generation to the most passive. Looking back, I think I only saw my dad cry twice in all of my life.

He died at an earlier age than me. And I was 24, but I remember the first time was around 1989 or so when construction plummeted. And he had a construction company.

We owned a lot of heavy equipment, drilling rigs and backhoes and things. And he came to me, it was tears, and he had to let me go. There was no more work.

And I was like the last employee. You know, barely getting by. I mean, eventually, he was having me go hoe weeds in the yard for like a week trying to keep me busy.

He said, son, you gotta go find some work. And I did. I started working for a masonry company.

I was what they call a laborer. A laborer for a masonry is you're just carrying block around, you're carrying concrete, and you're exhausted. And that lasted a little bit while.

But I remember just that brokenness and I never was able to work with him again. That never really picked up again. And then the second time was when after he went into heart surgery, years, a couple years went by, and then the doctor told him he needs to go back in for heart surgery.

And he was just, he was done with all that. And those are the only two times I can remember. And they were pivotal.

They were, I still remember today. I remember pretty much where he was standing, where I was standing over in Quartz Hill off Avenue M2, Dirt Road, where the library is. Across from the school there.

But those were moments that you saw the other side that is so important to see. That there's that, in this tough exterior, and I've shared many times before, I won't again, but from the farms of Oklahoma. You ever see that leather skin? Hard working, just that harder generation.

We'll just leave it at that. Not a lot of hugs and kisses, and I love you. It was tough.

But to see those tender moments that really even broke me as a young man. I was broken by those tender moments. And so the greatest need today, I believe, for men is to be bold and broken, tough and tender.

Now primarily, of course, this would be a type A alpha male, obviously. If you're type B, don't raise your hand, but it's okay. God makes both types.

But the type B needs to step on the gas. They need to get some of that toughness back. They need to get some of that boldness back.

And I don't know how in creation and why there's different personalities. For some, it comes easily. But there can be a timidity that slips in that one must repent of and say, God, give me that boldness of the Spirit.

And we could actually go through the Bible. Timothy was actually timid. But the boldness of the Spirit encouraged him to really get that strength back.

Because men are designed to be strong leaders and of course lead, but also defend. Who do your kids go to? Wives and husbands when they hear a noise, usually. Hopefully it's the guy, I don't know.

But they know, Dad, I've been getting this lately because it's summertime, come kill this spider. They never ask Mom to kill the spider. Or there's a noise outside, or somebody's here, we don't know, they're parked out front.

You know, that's the design. And so that's why this crazy debate now about just men dressing up as women and swimmers and they're in swimming sports and it's just everybody's the same. It's God created us, not better than, but to compliment.

That's why we consider ourselves, we're complimentarian. We compliment each other. There's things, there's strength in women that I don't have.

And there's strengths in men that they don't have. It's not better than, it's just come alongside and look at how God created us. But that's a whole other sermon.

I'm getting down the deep rabbit trail. So let's come out of the hole. By the way, I almost hit lots of rabbits early this morning on this road.

It's dark out. I didn't hit one though. But it was tough.

I thought of the rabbit holes. We get here at six in the morning. We open up the church for worship for those who are interested.

And the altar's open. We just have worship on for an hour and a half. That's one good way to go from tough to tender.

It's hard to worship God and stay tough, isn't it? And arrogant. He will break you. We've gone from the greatest generation to the most passive.

The wild stallion must be broken. The lion must be tamed. And the warrior must be humbled.

The blessing, I've taught on this before, but the blessing of brokenness. That would have been another great sermon title. But when a father weeps over the sins of his own sins and the sins of a nation, it can be powerful.

Strength and brokenness must lead the family. A daughter needs a dad to be the standard against which she judges all men. And a son needs to see the standard against which he judges himself.

I mean, just let that sink in. Isn't that so true? And I know, of course, reaching this many men here on radio, I know many men are probably feeling discouraged and defeated because they dropped the ball. If they could go back and change time.

How many of you would? Oh, I would do that. I mean, my goodness. Our past haunts us if we're not careful.

But I do want to encourage you today that yes, there are consequences of the past, but God is often about getting us on track now. Get on track and watch how I can rebuild that relationship with your kids. Watch how I can rebuild your family.

Watch how I can restore that. You'd be amazed, amazed, and that's an understatement at what God does with humility. And I believe even now, the wild stallion must be broken, the lion tamed, and the warrior humbled.

God breaks us in order to rebuild us. Strength and brokenness must lead the family. Strength and brokenness must lead the family.

A daughter, how many of you heard the first sentence? I made up the second one, but the first one's pretty popular. A daughter needs a dad to be the standard against which she judges all men. And a son needs to see the standard against which he judges himself.

The power, the power. I have this at the end, and I actually just printed it this morning. My daughter said I should read it, and I think it fits right now.

It's called Sermons We See. Just a real quick poem. I'm going to read just the highlights.

I'd rather see a sermon than hear one any day. I'd rather one should walk with me than merely tell me the way. The eye's a better pupil and more willing than the ear.

Find counsel is confusing, but example is always clear. And the best of all the preachers are the men who live their creeds, for to see good put into action is what everybody needs. I soon can learn to do it.

If you will show me how it's done, I can watch your hands in action, but your tongue too fast may run. And then you guys remember what I usually say on Father's Day, and the lectures you deliver may be very wise and very true, but I'd rather get my lesson by observing what you do. For I might misunderstand you and the high advice you give, dads, but there's no misunderstanding how you act and how you live.

And if you think I'm preaching this at you, no, I'm preaching this to all of us. This is a standard I will be chasing for the rest of my life. But there's a big difference when we let arrogance come in and blame shift and think we're that, all that, and we don't need to listen to this stuff versus somebody saying, God, I want to be that, help me.

And through that process, God will come alongside of you. The dangers of pride. Why am I going to talk about this? Because it opposes brokenness.

We need to be tough and tender, bold and broken. But pride opposes brokenness. And as we learned in the Psalm, David detoured.

The D's of pride. Number one is detoured. It will detour you.

Man, are you on a detour? Are you on a detour to your destiny? Remember one of my first sermons I preached many, many years ago with that title, from Samson, on a detour to destiny. Pride delays and it often prevents humility and brokenness. You get on a detour, you get off course.

Have you ever been on course and you're feeling great and then you get knocked off course and you've taken a detour? Did pride knock Samson off course? He's with Delilah, he says, no problem, I'll get up. Just as all the other times, I will shake myself off and I will defeat the Philistines. And an interesting, interesting verse.

The King James says, actually, he wist not. He knew not that the Spirit of the Lord had departed from him. The strength he needed, that Nazarite vow, had left him because of pride and disobedience.

He was on a detour. And I don't know if you've had a bad day, but I don't know if you've ever had your eyes gorged out. They didn't mess around in the Old Testament.

And I looked into it before what they did. Holy cow, how they keep your eyes open and they actually pull out your eyeballs. They remove your eyes.

And so now he's in the prison and he's pushing this thing. It says he's grinding like the oxen and pushing this thing. What would it do? It would grind the wheat from the chaff and it would begin to grind all their barley and he's grinding like an oxen.

How do you go from Samson, a mighty man of God, to this? Pride never wins, guys. Never. It'll knock you off course.

But then thank God, God brings the hope. As he was pushing, what happened? His hair began to grow back. Now that in itself didn't mean anything, but it was God showing that anointing was coming back.

That strength was coming back. And he had one final chance to kill those enemies of God. That little man, that little lad actually led him to the pillars and he pushed with all his might and the whole coliseum came down.

And it says the dead which he slew at his death were more than they which he slew in his life. He finished strong. He finished strong because he was humbled and broken.

Guys, David detoured and so can we. David was deceived. The pride of your heart has deceived you.

Pride is deceptive. And why it's deceptive is because when we operate in a lot of pride, we think we are what? Right. And everybody else is wrong.

And we live in deception. We don't see the blind spots. One statement pride will definitely make, and I hear it every year, hopefully not this year, but I'm giving you a warning.

Man, Shane, why do you always have to put the men down and not the women? Yeah, this is for women too. But I've heard this. Man, you're always hard on the guys.

Why ain't you gonna tell the wives off? Well, you know what that tells me? You just revealed yourself out of the abundance of the heart your mouth just spoke. So if you're feeling that way, this message is actually double for you. Because I know what's happening.

I'm convicted. I don't like what he says. I want him to go after her.

She's the problem. And they're mad at me. When you don't realize that the conviction can really turn you in a very positive direction.

David was also detained. God opposes the proud, but shows favor to the humble. Do you want favor in your business? Favor in your marriage? Favor in your home? Favor in your life? Man, the favor of God on you, it is so beautiful.

I've felt that favor, and I've walked in that favor, and I've also walked out of that favor. And there's no comparison. And so resisting the proud, he could say that investment's not gonna work.

That job opportunity's not gonna work. What you're trying so hard to accomplish is not gonna work. And when God keeps resisting, resisting, Christians will become very frustrated.

They're fighting against God. It's almost like they're moving in this direction, and here is this force. God's resisting me.

Things aren't happening. My investments aren't happening well. And the only reason I say finances is God often uses financial things or relational things or health issues to kind of get us back on track.

And I remember when I first started out, I was gonna start speaking. There was a book, I had a publicist. And it's like, wow, this is going quick.

I remember Jack Hayford, some of you, he endorsed my first book, so it kind of really took off. And just, okay, I'm ready. And okay, we got somewhere for you to go and speak.

I'm like, all right, great, where is it? It's at a homeless shelter at Grace Resource. What? Yeah, there's about nine homeless people there, and they need help with their nutrition. Whoa, man, I still remember that day.

It was the funnest I've had. Because I'm talking with them and helping them. They think, they have no idea.

And I have a passion for that because we shouldn't be giving the homeless or people in the hospital the worst food. They should be getting the best. That's a whole other topic.

But helping them and helping them, and then God would, boy, that's humiliating, right? I mean, and then God breaks you, and then He rebuilds you, and then you walk into a different area, and God will just keep that restraint on as long as humility is at the forefront. And it is a process. And you can be detained.

How many people are detained by pride? It's like God says, here and no further until you humble yourself. And then David was temporarily defeated because of pride. We know that the baby, he lost the baby.

Because of that, what we just read. But also, what is tied to that is the rise of Absalom. You know who that was, most of you? That was David's son.

And how, can you imagine your own son coming after you? They would have killed David. But David's still in his heart, said, spare his life. I think it was Joab, his commander, they just annihilated Absalom, and David just wept, oh, Absalom, Absalom.

My son, Absalom. The consequences of past actions. Don't be deceived, don't live in defeat.

Another kingly example was in Daniel. It says, when the king's heart was lifted up. The Bible often talks about lifted up, when your heart was lifted up, or stiff-necked Pharisees, or you always resist the Holy Spirit.

You've been hardened in pride. It's interesting, these terms, because lifted up, it's like you're lifting yourself up. It's self-exaltation.

When he was lifted up, thinking more highly of ourselves than we should. And then as a result, we become hardened, and that word hardened is interesting, because it can have an aspect of it, not open for feedback. I'm not open for feedback.

Oh dear, here we go. I was hoping I wouldn't remember this, but I did. Didn't happen at the first service, but it happened here.

Thank the Lord, or be mad at me, one or the other. From yesterday morning, from the book, The Toxic War on Masculinity, he said the health of a marriage depends primarily on the husband. In his research, Gottman found that the majority of American husbands, 65%, do not, in his words, accept influence from their wives.

I know many of you guys are going, oh, I hope he doesn't. Man, my wife's here. I feel your pain.

It was easy reading when Morgan wasn't here, but it's harder when she's here. They disregard their wives' opinions, feelings, and concerns. Ooh, the pen can drop in here.

They ignore, they criticize, and they drown out their wives' voices. They accuse them of overreacting. You're too sensitive.

When men behave this way, not surprisingly, their wives feel disrespected and devalued. He concludes that the husband's disrespect for their wives is the major cause of marital instability. Ouch! Ouch! And that's what this word hardened can mean.

Hardened. I'm hardened, and I'm not concerned with your advice or opinions or your feelings. We've become hardened to godly counsel.

And it's sad, but we see this a lot in the church. Even when we go to people in a loving way, just loving, following the biblical model, if their heart is hardened and they don't receive it, they push back. But if it's pliable and we're teachable, and we can all learn from it, true change and growth takes place.

It's amazing. I've seen it so many times. And I pray, Lord, soften our hearts, because if not, it's pointless.

That hardened heart, right? We don't want to be confronted and challenged. And because of this, He was removed from His throne. So I'm going to help you right now.

Lessons from David in a good way. How to humble yourself and be encouraged. Admitting and amending.

And God hears our cry. Did you know God hears your cry? If your eyes leak, your head won't swell. God hears the cries of His people.

And I just stumbled on it. Isaiah 30, I'm reading it yesterday, and I've got to share this verse. But it starts out, it says, Woe be to the rebellious children who take counsel but not of Me and who devise plans but not of My Spirit.

They go after the king of Egypt to get armies and safety. Why don't you just come to Me? God said. Woe be to the rebellious children.

But then later, He goes on to say He is very gracious to you at the sound of your cry. In other words, He says you went to Egypt. There's going to be judgment.

But if you cry out, I'm very sensitive to that crying. I'm very sensitive. But it took a little while in that chapter.

Because they started to look for false prophets who said tell me smooth things. Tell me smooth things. That's a hard one to say.

Remember when I had therapy when I was little? Silly Sally, seven suckers. I had a speech impediment and going to speech instructors. I had all kinds of issues.

God broke me at a young age. Humbled me. And it's a process.

But you have to admit and amend your ways. It's one thing to admit, but if you don't amend... See, one of the fruits of genuine repentance is you fix what you broke. Let me flesh this out so you don't get offended.

I'm sorry is not enough. I'm sorry must be followed by and here's what I'll do to show you I'm sorry. Somebody takes $1,000 from someone.

I'm sorry is not enough, is it? What do they need to do? Can you give me $1,000 back? So, repent, amend your ways, work going in that direction. And then number two we can learn from David. Pursue God.

You have to pursue Him even when you don't feel like it. Pursue Him. And that's the other thing from yesterday.

This is so important. I wish I had learned this 20 years ago. I sent it to my family.

I read it yesterday. Do you know what drudgery is? Going through the motions. Isn't that thing real exciting? I think it's Oswald Chambers said, that drudgery is the test of genuine character.

The greatest hindrance in our spiritual life. Ready for this? It's what he thinks. I tend to agree to some degree.

The greatest hindrance ever in our spiritual life is that we will only look for the big things to do for God. Jesus took a towel and began to wash feet. We all have those times when there are no flashes of light.

No apparent thrill to life. Where we experience nothing but the daily routine and its common everyday tasks. The routine of life is actually God's way of saving us between our times of great inspiration, which come from Him, and those times that don't.

Don't always expect God to give you a thrilling moment in looking for the big things. But learn to live in those common times of drudgery of life by the power of God. And why I wish I knew that is I remember, you know, I came back to the Lord in that incredible time in Quartz Hill, California, and just on my face, and you can't explain it.

It's just joy unspeakable. The filling of the Holy Spirit, the boldness. I mean, it's like, whoa.

I was wondering if I ever saved to begin with after this traumatic work. And like, I mean, no matter where you go, right? If you've been there, there's a joy, there's an excitement. You can't wait to get out and go shopping at Trader Joe's because you might lead somebody to the Lord.

You can't wait until you get to church. Do we have it? I remember, is there Wednesdays or is something on Fridays for singles? Is it the same for Sunday? And you're just, you're hungry for God. And then sometimes that fades.

And in comes the drudgery, the difficulties. I've had times where I've preached and I can't wait to get to the pulpit. Sometimes speaking at conferences and I can't, you can just, oh, there's so much excitement, like pregnant with the Word and just excited to, but there's other times where it's drudgery to even get here.

You know it's difficult. And you're always like, Lord, what's the big thing you want us to? What do you, and you forget about the little things that are so important. And here's where many marriages begin to fail is because when that excitement is gone, the spark is gone, they say.

It's persevering through those difficult times. And it's the same thing in the Christian walk. Getting back up and fighting.

And I realized even more lately is that it's about everyday life. I might not feel like doing certain things all the time. I'm waiting, but it's like you're waiting for that.

Man, if we could have the Acts chapter two upper room experience every Sunday, that would be incredible. Right, you just come in, you feel like, man, God is in this place. The presence of God.

You're so full of God. Nobody's gonna, you're never gonna get in an argument, at least for that day. Give me a flat tire, the dishes are dirty, the house is a mess, I owe money to the IRS.

I don't care, I've been with God. Right, don't you wanna live in those moments? I think it's okay to pursue those, but remember that God also gives us the very regular, mundane things to go through as well. So you have to pursue God, regard Him, seek Him with all of your heart.

And then you have to position yourself correctly. What I mean by position is where David, and I was gonna go through the whole thing, David, when he hung out with certain men, and when he went in a wrong direction, or Saul, a lot of the Christian life is about positioning. Are you sitting underneath the fountain of living water daily? You know, in the church, and at services, or in your own personal devotional, or in your home groups, or different things, you're positioning yourself correctly, versus in front of YouTube, right, or Twitter, whatever the thing's called.

And it's all about positioning, because where you look is what you find. Oh, I want more of God, but we're positioning ourselves in places that are not good. Have you ever been there? Position yourself.

And if we had time, we'd go through all the different verses. I just talked about the one, if you seek me, you will find me. Well, seeking means I have to move.

I have to position myself. If you call out, I will hear you. If you make no provision for the flesh, that means I have to run from the desire to the, and so there's so many things, it's about positioning.

And I remember, I shared this with the men. I don't know, it might get me in trouble, but if you listen to the message, you'll hear it anyway, so, but it's not bad, it's kind of funny. But I remember, I came back to the Lord, and it's still a struggle.

Ever been there? Have you ever struggled with the old nature? It doesn't want to let go easy. And so I was juggling, I'll just admit it. I know it's gonna be hard to hear, but I was juggling church and schooners.

You know, it was on the old location, back in the late 90s. And I'm, ah, ah, ah, and I realized where I look is what I find. Am I gonna find Morgan over here? Schooners? No? So I had to make a decision.

I repent of all that, Lord, I've gotta give that completely up and follow You, and then months and months and months go by. I'm in church just worshiping, and here God brings the right person. Position.

Position. There's a lot to do with our choices. I had to stop all my trips to Bakersfield or the Crystal Palace, all the Las Vegas, Laughlin, all the Palm Springs.

Palm Springs was pumping back then in the spring break in the 1990s. It was ridiculous. It was ridiculous.

I remember they hired me to be a bouncer, and I was only 19. Carding people and different things, and I had to just completely turn from that life, and position myself. Oh, Shane, you want Mrs. Right, you better become Mr. Right.

And it's all about positioning. I better give a big encouragement, because some of you met in bars. So God can clean up the mess.

It's okay, it's okay. Once you say I do, yeah, there's no I don't. So once you say I do, and I believe God takes that redemptive work, He can work it further.

So all things work together for those who love. So no matter where you met, I'm just saying for my own sake, I'm trying to get myself out of this one. Because I had that conviction.

Have you ever felt that you know, Shane, you got this full surrender is full surrender. How long do you waver between two opinions? And it was that pull of the flesh that has to be conquered. And then number three, apply the Word of God.

This is how you humble yourself. You apply the Word of God. What does it mean husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church? If you ever have to submit, say woman submit to me.

The Bible says that you need to get up to this altar when this service ends. Because that's not biblical. You don't need to go around slapping your whatever, your desk or your Bible.

Look at what it says, submit to me. Well, actually before that says you submit to Christ. And when you submit to Christ, you don't have to do that.

It just comes naturally. People want to submit to those who are leading and loving God. Apply the Bible, apply the Word, apply wisdom to your heart.

Sometimes God allows pain or a person to break us. And I was going back and forth. I had it in my notes.

I took it out and I put it back because I don't want to be too discouraging because I know life is difficult. Many of us, or many can relate to this, but I think it is important. It's from Michael Reagan.

He's actually the son of Ronald Reagan. If we have the quote, I don't know if I said it or not. About this breaking process.

He wrote of his parents' divorce. Divorce is where two adults take everything that matters to a child, the child's home, family, security, and sense of being loved and protected, and they smash it to pieces and leave it to ruins on the floor, then walk out and leave the child to clean up the mess. And the reason I bring that up is, many of you who have already dealt with this and you felt the pain of this, there's nothing you can do at this point.

God knows your heart and God can fix that situation. But guys, there's a lot of people who need to hear this. They're on the verge of divorce.

It's an epidemic right now, even in the church. And they don't realize just how selfish that is, especially when kids are involved. And God will use things like this to break us, situations like this to break us.

I remember, I think it was on Focus on the Family. Years ago, this dad had left his daughters and his wife for someone else. And they're just kind of going through the motions.

I don't know if the divorce was final yet. He was on Focus on the Family, I think giving his testimony. But months went by and the daughter talked to her dad and she said, Dad, I had a terrible nightmare last night.

Me and Mom and whoever the other daughters were were driving in a car and we got hit. We got T-boned at 80 miles an hour and just rammed us and we died. And he's like, oh honey, I'm so sorry.

Wow, that's heavy. And she said, yeah, but Dad, you were driving the car. And that broke him.

He went home and restored the marriage. And all week, guys, I've been praying. I've been praying this morning because I do not want to feel like, oh, just beating up the men, beating up the men.

But at what point do we, and again, I know those who are in different situations, they need different types of encouragement. Those who are doing great, this might not apply, but for a lot of people out there, they need that loving confrontation. They need to realize what they are doing to their families and to their kids.

And that should get us to wake up. Again, God will use pain or a person to break us. It's a wonderful thing.

Break the pride out of you. Anybody need the pride broken out of you? Man, that's why I feel for these guys, these billionaires or millionaires. They're all on social media.

They are so much pride. Oh my goodness. And they're trusting in those things, but God will discipline you.

I read this last Sunday, but I want to read it again because it's actually for Father's Day, but I borrowed it last Sunday. Do you not know that you are the temple of God? 1 Corinthians 3.16, we can put that on the screen too. Do you not know that you are the temple of God? Man, if you are believers, if you are a Christian, did you know that? Now, it doesn't mean you're a temple with gold and all this kind of in a weird way, but the Holy Spirit comes into the heart of a believer and resides there.

And so that's why we have that conviction. There's no way to get rid of it. It's the Holy Spirit convicting.

Now, you can quench and grieve that conviction by continuing in sin, but we are the temple of God and the Holy Spirit dwells in you. If anyone defiles the temple of God, God will destroy him. Holy smokes.

Talk about walking on eggshells with God. Have you ever been there? But that's not the correct interpretation or to think right away God destroys us. But first, what is defilement? If anyone defiles the temple of God, defilement is a word that comes actually from the Old Testament, when they would defile the sanctuary.

Remember those priests that would go in and they would offer profane fire to God and He killed them. They defiled the sanctuary or a king would go in and try to do a priestly duty and he defiled that temple or the defilement of the children of Israel marrying pagan wives and being led astray by their religion. There was a defilement.

It's not just sexual defilement, although that is one thing dealing with this word. It's a defilement of disrespect for God and His Word. And they said, if you defile the temple of God, God will destroy you.

Now hold on, it's going to be encouraging. Just let me get there. You also need to know this, at least from what I can gather, it's not, you know, a person, man, Lord, I made a mistake.

I should have did that last week. God, I'm so sorry. I repent, I need to get help or I need to work on my... Whatever it is, God, you're repentant, you're working on it.

You cry out to God. God is with that type of, what we just read, a broken and contrite heart, I will not cast away. So God is with that type of person.

But this defilement is that unrepentant sin and I don't care. I don't care what God says. I don't really, I'm not going to change.

I mean, over the years, I've talked to even men or women, who knows? Both sides, of course, but they're engaged in something that is very bad, but they don't care. I know what God's Word says, Shane. Here's my favorite line.

But I just want to be happy. Oh, pardon me? We don't need the... Yeah, yeah, good point. I know what the Bible says, but I just want to be happy.

Morgan, I think we're in Lancaster. This young lady left her husband and two kids. No, but I just want to be happy.

Now, I understand if you're in a very abusive relationship. I mean, again, please, guys, give me some grace. I understand there's different, everybody likes to use the exception to prove the rule wrong, but that's not the case.

For the most part, for the most part, that's what defilement, defilement's a repetitive behavior. In that word, God will destroy you. The word actually in the Greek means God may injure you.

God may injure you. So, you're walking in unrepentant sin, you're defilement. God says, boom, injured.

Ah, get you back on course. Ah, that's why I pull my hamstring. I'm like, Lord, are you trying to tell me something in here? Show me, or is this just coincidence, right? But He will injure you.

He will knock you down. He will pull down the strongholds you've built of security, or He will dismantle, or He will impair you to get you to wake up. That's how God wakes up a believer in sin.

That word destroy means He will do something to wake you up, to knock you out. Like I just knocked you down, that story I just gave about that dad who was probably gonna go see his girlfriend later that day. And his daughter said, but you're driving the car.

Bam, knocked me down. And I try not to be specific because there's a lot of things going on that we know, people, no, they don't. But I know guys that make a lot of money and they're doing different things.

I won't be too specific. Left their wife recently. And now, the finances seem to be really drying up.

Maybe losing a house. Maybe, it's like, what's going on? God will knock you down. He will pull you down.

He will dismantle. He disciplines those He loves. So never run from the loving rebukes of God.

Never, because that paddle spanking might get harder. Guys, I've seen people, it's been sad, you know, you begin to lose everything or God's waking you up and you ignore and you ignore and maybe then now allows a sickness, an illness that could lead to death along the way trying to wake up and get our attention. And if we had time on this whole theme, we could go through the Bible.

There's so much evidence. So much evidence. What about that King Herod? Herod is a God and not a man.

Herod, and he's like, yes, I am. And the Bible says, and worms ate him. Worms ate him.

I mean, God doesn't mess around. Have you heard of the Ananias and Sapphira? You will in the book of Acts. God doesn't play around.

They lied to the Holy Spirit. And so if God is getting your attention, listen, listen, Lord, what are you telling me? What do you want me to do? Versus hardening our hearts. Sadly, most people run from the breaking process or they blame shift.

Do you know what blame shifting is? Oh, we've become really good at that. Really good at blame shifting. And I'm going to get the closing here.

It's a little bit long, but bear with me. Not long in a bad way, but long in a good way. So David, close with these words again.

I want to put it up there. Have mercy upon me. This is what needs to happen this morning.

You just need to say, God, have mercy upon me according to your loving kindness. See, it's not according to your good works. It's not according to something you do.

According, here's God's loving kindness. He's long suffering. He's patient.

Loving kindness. This is the attributes of God. All God requires is a broken and contrite heart.

That's it. And Lord, please forgive me according to the multitude of your tender mercies. Blot out, remove my sins.

Wash me thoroughly from iniquity and cleanse me from my sin. For I have acknowledged my transgressions and my sin is always before me. Brokenness can lead to blessings if you long for God.

Brokenness can lead to blessings if you long for God. Think about this. Long for Him to rebuild.

Long for Him to restore. Long for Him to revive. Long for Him to renew something in your life.

David said, as I said last Sunday, my soul, what? Longs for you in a dry and barren and desolate land. He's basically saying, Lord, I need help. My heart has grown cold and callous and like the dirt that is hard.

Have you ever had that hard pan dirt? It's just chalky and there's nothing there. There's no life. Nothing's growing.

No animals. He says, oh, my soul longs for you just as much as that dirt longs for the rain to come down and flood it again and let the grass and the life grow just as a deer pants after that brook. Oh, my soul longs for me.

It longs for thee. You've gotta bring that even if you don't feel it. Even if you're caught in sin.

Even if you don't like what I'm saying. You gotta say, God, I long for that, please. And God says, I hear the cries of my people.

Back to the theme of this message. When men weep, God moves. When men weep, God moves.

And I don't mean like crybabies. I mean like warriors that are broken at the condition of what is going on. When is the last time you wept over the sex trafficking? On what planet is this even acceptable? The kids, the young, it's like, I wanna go home, Lord.

I wanna go home. When men weep, God moves. Moses wept and interceded.

David, oh, David interceded and wept. And these most powerful, think about the most powerful figures we know in the Bible. They were weepers and warriors.

Hezekiah, that great king, cried out to God. Jeremiah, known as the weeping prophet, cried out to God. Isaiah cried out to God.

When men weep, God moves. From blind beggars to lepers and from prostitutes to desperate parents in the Bible, they would all come and cry out, oh, teacher, have mercy on me. Oh, teacher, have mercy on me.

Can you imagine, sometimes just imagine if you were there, the blind beggars crying out, Jesus, have mercy on me. They actually told them to shut up. Quiet, Jesus is coming by.

And he said, bring them to me. Women caught in the act of adultery or those possessed with demons or Jesus, have mercy on my child. Have you ever seen a child demon possessed? Or has a demon, I guess is the correct way to, and when your kids go through it, there's nothing more traumatic.

And you see these parents coming to Jesus and crying out to Him. Again, name one person who cried out to Jesus who wasn't helped. Set your heart deep in God.

Set your heart deep in God. Jesus said, peace I leave with you, my peace I give to you. Rest in Jesus is not an empty feeling that comes over us in church.

It is the resting of a heart set deep in God. Men, you must rest in Christ. You must rest in Christ.

Stop, slow down, surrender. Correct? Stop going your own direction. Stop thinking you know it all.

Slow down. The enemy wants to get us busy, especially men, busy. Too busy for God.

Too busy for devotional time. Too busy to seek Him. That's often our excuse, is it not? We are too busy.

And then surrender, fully surrender. And I think as men, I've done enough men conferences and different things, that's a hard one for us. Because we think it's weakness.

I remember, I've seen tough guys. I mean, I don't know, I can't quite do that. I don't want to give up this, I don't want people to see me at church, I'm kind of, you know, it's like, ah, I don't know about that.

But with God, partial surrender is not surrender. I'm not talking about perfect surrender either. I'm talking about, Lord, I give you everything.

I surrender my marriage. Some time ago, I had to surrender my kids. Have you ever been there? You're trying to control the atmosphere, the environment, the health, this.

Okay, but Lord, especially living in California, Los Angeles County, I've got to surrender my kids. Surrender the marriage, surrender the church, surrender finances. Lord, I give you everything, what do you want me to do? Now, am I the perfect example? No, I'm a work in progress, because sometimes the flesh wants to come and go, mine.

Mine. Like my two year old, when I had a two year old. It's mine, mine, mine.

Surrender, mine. Surrender, mine. It's a battle, and that's why we struggle.

You guys, you might remember this, I don't know if from a year ago, but I was going through my notes, just popped up on Gmail. I did a search for something, and I remember, I want to share these on Father's Day. And I want you to remember something very important.

We must seek Christ like never before. He is the shepherd of the shattered, the fixer of the fractured, the counselor for the confused, the healer for the injured, the deliverer of the wounded, the governor for the guilty, the rebuilder of the broken, the defender of the damaged, the rock for the worried, the rest for the weary, the Lord of hosts, and the Savior for the sinner. The Bible's clear, everything I'm saying here.

It's very clear. You must confess that Christ is Lord. Repent of your sin, believe in your heart that Jesus is your Savior.

God raised Him from the dead. Confess with your mouth. You raised Him from the dead, and you will be saved.

It's not a good teacher. It's not like all religions lead to God. None of that.

Jesus said, I am the only way, the only truth, the only life. Nobody comes to the Father except through the cross.