Understand and Appreciate Your Wife

I'll tell you honestly, I never get tired of listening to Andre. He's always so interesting. He takes so much pains to share to the point in such a ways where I'm concerned I'm not bored even for one second and there's so much in it.

You know like what he said about being constantly in touch with the source of power. We are very particular. You open the fridge, the light is not on and say hey or something is smelling, you immediately check the power.

Has connection been lost? Now imagine if we could live our life like that, that as soon as I find a smelly attitude towards some person whom you don't like, don't think of that person. Throw out that bad smelly attitude and check the source of power. I think maybe you lost power somewhere along the way.

You lost your touch with the Holy Spirit because of some area where you were careless. The Holy Spirit is always so eager to fill us that if we lose that connection it is only because we were a little careless somewhere or ignored some small matter and the power is gone. You know how a small thing can rob us of the power.

So I believe Andre with all his limitations, the tremendous limitations and he can they often think he can hardly come here. How much we all look forward to just being present in person and with all his limitations he has been a challenge to my life ever since I met him. I remember the first time I met him and I discovered he had got into a bus, he had no car those days, limited and pushed and rolled his wheel, he had automatic, that chair he drives on and drove all the way down to that school where we were having a conference and as soon as I saw him I said I got to go and meet this brother as soon as the conference is over, as soon as the first day of meeting was over and I'm very thankful for the fellowship I have had with him since that day.

He's blessed my heart tremendously. We were hearing about married life. Do you remember all the 55 points that Bobby told us? It's difficult to remember all of them but everything he said was right.

I can sum it up in what the Bible says in 1 Peter 3 verse 7. You husbands in the same way live with your wives in an understanding way as with someone weaker since she's a woman and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life so that your prayers are not hindered. I believe that every brother when some prayer of his is not answered, when he's praying for himself, Lord fill me with the Holy Spirit or some other thing he's earnestly praying for in terms of his job or some situation the prayer is not answered, the first thing he should consider is this verse. Is my prayer hindered because of a wrong attitude towards my wife? In fact as far as I know this is the only place in the Bible where it says somebody's prayers can be hindered.

For a believer's prayers can be hindered and it's in relation to his relationship to his wife and so it's something you've got to take seriously because prayer is such an important part of our life. I don't think I don't know what my life would have been if I could not communicate with God in prayer all the time concerning emergency. I need something here Lord please help me these emergency prayers and also regular times of prayer for our family for our children so I don't want my life ever to have my prayers hindered.

I hope all of you folks say that it it works both for husbands and wives even the wife's prayers will be hindered if she doesn't live in an understanding way with her husband so it's not just one way but think of that expression that your prayers should not be hindered. Take it seriously because I think many of us will have to admit that a lot of things we prayed for have not been answered. We want a life of total victory over sin and it hasn't come.

We want a life of continuous fullness of the Holy Spirit and we're not probably experiencing it. When we read God's Word we want revelation and we're not getting it and we're satisfied. We should not be satisfied.

We should ask why is my prayer hindered? Why am I not getting that thing I asked for? But as Jesus gives so many promises for prayer why is that prayer of mine which I asked for not granted? Perhaps I need to come to 1 Peter 3 7. Husband or wife? Is there something in our relationship which is hindering God answering prayer? Now this is so important because in the Old Testament there is zero importance given to husband-wife relationship. Absolutely zero. You look through the Old Testament and all the great men in the Old Testament, they had pretty bad marriages.

The only thing I read about Moses is him fighting with his wife. An argument they had for many years about shall we circumcise the son or not and gone on for so many years that God was so angry with Moses that he wanted to kill him. Imagine that and his wife immediately knew.

You read that in Exodus 4. As soon as Moses was dying gasping for breath his wife knew. I know. My husband's been telling me to circumcise my child and I have not listened.

So he she immediately circumcised the child and said okay here's the foreskin you can have it and Moses was healed. We got to learn from some of these instances there in the Old Testament. So family life was not a big thing in the Old Testament.

There was no we can say we heard of first flow second for third floor first floor is living at the good conscience second floor is living in a loving way with the family the bringing up children properly and the third floor is building the church being useful in the ministry in the church. So in the Old Testament there was no second floor. It just didn't exist.

You could live any way you like with your wife and you could be a prophet and your children could be wayward you could still be a prophet you can imagine Samuel that mighty prophet his children were taking bribes and the people came and complained to Samuel hey your children are taking bribes take them get them out of here but till the end of his life Samuel was the greatest prophet of his time. There are some preachers today who seek to follow those Old Testament prophets. Their children are wayward and they still think they can serve the Lord.

No. This is the New Testament where we need a second floor. You're not even not you don't have not for being a prophet for being an ordinary member of the body of Christ which all of us are.

Think of yourself as an ordinary member of the body of Christ. You have to have a good relationship you know it doesn't have to be perfect a good relationship with your marriage partner husband or wife and really seek to bring up your children properly. So here when it says husbands living with your wives in an understanding way what does that mean? I read this for years I have to say for many years I never thought understood what it meant till I saw it's written right there.

What does it mean to live in an understanding way? What do I have to understand? Number one thing it's written in the next phrase. Your woman the wife is weaker. That's what you got to understand.

Let me paraphrase it. Husbands live in your wives understanding that she is a weaker vessel. In every way.

Why does she cry so easily? Weaker vessel. Why can't she lift the suitcase that I can lift? Weaker vessel. Why can't she handle this problem the way I can handle it? Weaker vessel.

For everything where you have some criticism of your wife get back here and say she's a weaker vessel. That's why I can handle it and she can't. Husbands recognize that always otherwise your prayers will be hindered.

So don't think why isn't she as spiritual as me? Why doesn't she control her emotions like I can? Here's the answer. Weaker vessel. Weaker vessel.

Weaker vessel. I tell you there'll be a lot more peaceful homes if we just follow Scripture carefully. Read it slowly, slowly, carefully.

The answer is right there. Sometimes we don't see it and the other thing is I'm going to live in my wife in an understanding way with your wife in understanding ways. Also written there she is a fellow heir.

That means her throne. Her throne is not six inches below mine. No.

If I am the king she's the queen and her throne is exactly the same level. That's what is meaning of fellow heir. So her throne is not a little lower level.

Yeah the wives have to be subject to her husband's true but she's a fellow heir equal and that's the other thing I got to recognize. So basically it's only two things I have to recognize. One she's weaker and one she's my equal.

If I recognize that my prayers will not be hindered. The other thing you know it's very interesting when Colossians when it says husbands love your wives. We can go to so many things about loving the wife but here it says only one thing.

Colossians 3 19. Husbands love your wives and don't get bitter against them. That's the only thing mentioned.

So that means there's a real danger of something happening that can make a husband a little bitter against his wife. Something. Watch out for that and how shall we appreciate.

Everything that we do must be genuine. So if you appreciate your wife I mean you just say that to her you're beautiful and you're so nice and everything you do is good. It could be diplomacy.

It could be a technique too because you want something or you want to make her happy. Genuine appreciation what the Lord has told me is if you genuinely appreciate your wife you must express your appreciation when she doesn't hear it. Of course you must say you must also tell her herself appreciate anything she's done say thank you.

But what I mean is have you ever done this I do it many times. When your wife is fast asleep in her bed and you are awake maybe in the middle of the night you wake up for a few minutes and you look at your wife sleeping there fast asleep. Do you ever bow down before God and say Lord I thank you for giving me such a wonderful wife who's been so good to me so patient with me.

Do that many times when she doesn't hear it but then you'll know that your appreciation is genuine before God then you would have fulfilled the scriptures. You will build that second floor. Amen.