Christian conduct involves living out faith through actions marked by integrity, humility, and love, reflecting Christ's example. Illustrations often use everyday scenarios like self-examination, thoughtful speech, and going beyond duty to show practical holiness (Romans 12:9-21). This subject calls believers to embody grace and kindness in all interactions (Ephesians 4:29).
Complaining without helping is useless; true followers carry their cross actively.
The story was once told of a woman driver whose car stalled in traffic and she was unable to get it restarted. The fellow who was behind her, and thus unable to move, thought it necessary to constantly show his impatience by honking his horn every few seconds. Finally, the woman walked back to his car and said, "If you will go try to start my car, I'll stay here and honk your horn for you."
So many times in the church this is the case. The one who is not doing anything to help is also the one who makes the most noise complaining that nothing is happening. When You Carry Your Cross, You Will Have No Room for a Chip
Lord,
You said if I want to follow you, I will need to carry my cross every day. I want to follow, Lord.
But there are days when I'm dragging my cross, making a trail for everyone to see. There are days when I'm pushing my cross, making my own path miserable and dusty. There are days when I'm sitting on my cross, trying to get comfortable and going nowhere. There are days when I'm giving my cross to somebody else, who already has one of his own.
Help me, Lord, to carry my cross on my shoulder. When it's up there, it leaves no room for a chip!
We often criticize others' faults while ignoring our own, as Jesus taught.
A serviceman once wrote about a moment of comedy he had witnessed in the army. It happened during a company inspection at the Redstone Arsenal in Alabama.
The inspection was being conducted by a full colonel. Everything had gone smoothly until the officer came to a certain soldier, looked him up and down and snapped, "Button that pocket, trooper!"
The soldier, more than a little rattled, stammered, "Right now, sir?"
"Of course, right now!" was the reply.
Whereupon the soldier very carefully reached out and buttoned the flap on the colonel's shirt pocket. The officer had been quick to note the youngster's uniform problem, but hadn't noticed his own.
For some reason, we seem to be the same way. The faults of others stick out like a missing tooth, while our own are often hard to spot. Small specks in other people seem major, while the planks in our own eye seem excusable (Matthew 7:1-5).
Let's quit dwelling on the faults of others all the time. The church needs builders and workers-not a wrecking crew. Work on your own faults, then seek to help others in a spirit of gentleness. That Anonymous Note
Dwight Moody was preaching when someone passed a note to him through the usher. It had only one word: "Fool." Moody looked at it and said, "I've often received notes that weren't signed. This is the first time I've received a note that someone forgot to write, but signed."
Before criticizing, ask if it is true, needful, and kind.
When you are disposed to criticize a friend,
Just remember, the beginning's not the end;
When within this urge you find,
These three questions bring to mind:
Is it TRUE? Is it NEEDFUL? Is it KIND?
Critics often do nothing themselves; better to do what God calls you to do.
A man came up to Moody once and criticized him for the way he went about winning souls. Moody listened courteously and then asked, "How would you do it?" The man, taken aback, mumbled that he didn't do it. "Well," said Moody, "I prefer the way I do it to the way you don't do it."
Do not be angered by sinners mocking godly living; pity their spiritual blindness instead.
"If cripples mock us for going upright, we pity them." If worldlings rail at us for endeavouring to lead godly and sober lives, we should not be angry, but rather sorrow over their infatuation. No wise man will swerve an inch from his path to please those who are mad with sin, nor will he break his heart because idiotic sinners make a jest of his uprightness.
Christians should shine by good behavior to glorify God before others.
As a candle lighteth every man in the house; so, likewise, should the good behavior, wise dealings, and upright conversation of Christians, shine bright before men, that God by them may be glorified.
Sometimes it's wiser to avoid pointless disputes than to insist on winning.
A young preacher was riding out with one of his deacons, when they encountered a hog lying across the road. The deacon advised the preacher to turn out for the hog; but he persisted in keeping the road. At last, the preacher was compelled to go around the hog, or be upset; and thus effectually learned the lesson, "Never contend with a hog."
Christian behavior should be holy, loving, kind, compassionate, and peaceable.
1. It should be holy. 2. It should be without offence. 3. It should be loving and kind. 4. It should be full of compassion and mercy. 5. It should be peaceable.
— J. Beaumont
Christian disagreement harms God's acceptance, like discordant music offends the ear.
As in music, if the harmony of tones be not complete, they are offensive to the cultivated ear; so, if Christians disagree among themselves, they are unacceptable to God. Cawdray.
Dress so that others remember you, not your clothing.
Madam, so dress and so conduct yourself, that persons who have been in your company shall not recollect what you had on. Rev. John Newton.
An emperor enforced Jesus' teaching on treating others rightly, even in punishment.
Severus the emperor had that sentence of our Saviour often in his mouth, "Whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them;" and commanded it be proclaimed by the crier whensoever he punished such of his soldiers as had offered injury to others.
True politeness shows self-denial and consideration for others' happiness, not just manners.
Should an acquaintance tread on your best dress, and tear it, how profuse you are with your "Never minds," "Don't think of it," "I don't care at all"! If a husband does it, he gets a frown; if a child, he is chastised. A gentleman stops at a friend's house, and finds it in confusion. "He don't see any thing to apologize for, never thinks of such matters; every thing is all right" (cold supper, cold room, crying children), "perfectly comfortable." Goes home; his wife has been taking care of the sick ones, and worked her life almost out. "Don't see why things can't be kept in better order: there never were such cross children before!" No apologies except away from home.
Politeness never harms a person, even in dangerous or life-threatening situations.
While an officer was bowing, a cannon-ball passed over his head, and decapitated a soldier who stood behind him. "You see," said the officer to those near him, "that a man never loses by politeness."
Kindness and politeness can secure opportunities beyond social status or recommendations.
Two boys, the one a gentleman's son, and the other the son of a poor widow, applied to a merchant for a situation; when the latter was chosen. A trifling incident decided the choice. Just as the two boys came together to the merchant's door, a poor ragged girl fell on the icy sidewalk, and lost her pennies, and cried bitterly. The first boy laughed rudely; but the other went to the girl's aid, and, fishing in the gutter for the pennies, found one, and replaced the other from his own little purse. The merchant observed all; and though the first had strong recommendations, and the other none, the poor boy's politeness secured him the place.
Genuine politeness arises from self-denial and preferring others above oneself.
True politeness is not wholly made up of graceful manners, and courtly conversation, and a strict adherence to the rules of fashion, however agreeable these may be. It is something less superficial than these accomplishments. Genuine courtesy grows out of an assiduous self-denial, and a constant consideration of the happiness of others. The forms and usages of etiquette derive all their beauty and significance from the fact that each of them requires the sacrifice of one's own ease and convenience to another's comfort. St. Paul, who before Felix and
Agrippa, and even when the object of the abuse and insult of the Jewish mob, showed what should be the conduct of a true gentleman, has included all of refinement in these few words, "In honor preferring one another." How noble does the same principle appear in the words of the chivalrous Sir Philip Sidney, who, when he lay wounded on the battle-field, and was offered a cup of cold water, motioned it to a suffering soldier at his side, and said, "This man's necessity is greater than mine!"
Christians should respond to others' faults with love, not harsh judgment.
"Is she a Christian?" asked a celebrated missionary in the East, of one of the converts who was speaking unkindly of a third party. "Yes, I think she is," was the reply. "Well, then, since Jesus loves her in spite of that, why is it that you can't?" The rebuke was felt, and the fault-finder instantly withdrew. Some days later, the same party was speaking to the missionary in a similar spirit about another person. The same question was put, "Is she a Christian?" In a half-triumphant tone, as if the speaker were beyond the reach of gunshot this time, it was answered, "I doubt if she truly is." — "Oh! then," rejoined the missionary, "I think that you and I should feel such tender pity for her soul as to make any harsher feeling about her quite impossible."
— Family Treasury
Christians should avoid harshness and bitterness even when correcting error.
Mr. Newton, of London, was a very candid and friendly critic, and was often applied to by young authors for his opinions and remarks, which he would give very candidly, and sometimes under the name of Nibblings. On one of these occasions a practical essay was put into his hand, which he approved; but a letter was appended, addressed to an obscure and contemptible writer, who had said very unwarrantable and absurd things on the subject, and whom therefore the writer attacked with little ceremony. The following is a specimen of some of Mr. Newton's nibblings:—"Were the affair mine, I would take no notice of Mr. —; but, if I did, it should be with the hope, at least with the desire, of doing good, even to him. This would make me avoid every harsh epithet. He is not likely to be benefited by calling him a fool. The evangelists simply relate what is said and done, and use no bitterness nor severity, even when speaking of Herod, Pilate, or Judas. I wish their manner was more adopted in controversy."
True godliness shows in modest dress and gentle manners, not in outward appearance.
A lady asked the Rev. John Newton, what was the best rule for female dress and behavior. "Madam," said he, "so dress and so conduct yourself, that persons who have been in your company shall not recollect what you had on." This will generally be the case where singularity of dress is avoided, and where intelligence of mind and gentleness of manners are cultivated.
Singing helps a clergyman's family overcome discontent and maintain harmony.
An excellent clergyman, possessing much knowledge of human nature, instructed his large family of daughters in the theory and practice of music. They were all observed to be exceedingly amiable and happy. A friend inquired if there was any secret in his mode of education. He replied, "When any thing disturbs their temper I say to them sing, and if I hear them speaking against any person, I call them to sing to me, and so they have sung away all causes of discontent, and every disposition to scandal." Such a use of this accomplishment, might serve to fit a family for the company of angels. Young voices around the domestic altar, breathing sacred music at the hour of morning and evening devotion, are a sweet and touching accompaniment.
# ABILITY.
action, "If I did not before know you were noble, I know it now."
St. Paul's Cathedral forbade swearing to honor God and maintain holiness on the worksite.
When this eminent architect was building St. Paul's Cathedral, he caused the following notice to be affixed to several parts of the structure:—“Whereas among laborers and others, that ungodly custom of swearing is so frequently heard, to the dishonor of God and contempt of his authority; and to the end that such impiety may be utterly banished from these works, which are intended for the service of God, and the honor of religion; it is ordered that profane swearing shall be a sufficient crime to dismiss any laborer that comes to the call; and the clerk of the works, upon a sufficient proof, shall dismiss him accordingly; and if any master, working by task, shall not, upon admonition, reform the profanation among his apprentices, servants, and laborers, it shall be construed his fault, and he shall be liable to be censured by the commissioners.”
A leafy tree without fruit illustrates a Christian's empty profession and fruitless rebellion.
Leaves a type of Christian testimony. Tree with leaves but no fruit picture of Christian who professes but bears no fruit. Many Christians become withered because of persistent rebellion against the will of God
Proper respect avoids vulgar familiarity even in friendship.
Some men make true friendship with them impossible, because they allow a slight familiarity such license as to border on vulgarity. "There was Mr. B—," said Mr. Spurgeon; "he was a big man in his way, and seemed very anxious to make me his friend. He was very hospitable and generous. I was friendly and agreeable with him. Then he began to call me 'Charles.' I looked at him. I did not mind it much, but had he been my father or brother he could scarcely have done more. I thought I would let him see how it looked, so I called him 'John.' He did not see my purpose, and so went on to call me 'Charley.' Then I called him 'Jack.' That cured him, and he dropped it. But I could see he had little of the sense of propriety." Undue familiarity with men of position, especially with ministers of the Gospel, calling them "Tom," or "Bob," or "Dick," is unworthy, and ought not to be indulged in.
True religion is shown by shining actions, not words, illustrating faith through conduct.
seen . Lamps do not talk, but they do shine: a lighthouse sounds no drum, it beats no gong; and yet, far over the waters its friendly spark is visible to the mariner. So let your actions shine out your religion. Let the main sermon of your life be illustrated by all your conduct, and it shall not fail to be illustrious.
Politeness and humility open doors to favor and blessings in daily life.
A well-known lawyer related a good story about himself and his efforts to correct the manners of his office boy:
One morning not long ago, the young autocrat blew into the office, and, tossing his cap at a hook, exclaimed:
“Say, Mr. Blank, there’s a ball-game down at the park to-day and I am going down.”
Now, the attorney is not a hard-hearted man, and was willing the boy should go, but thought he would teach him a little lesson in good manners.
“Jimmie,” he said, “that isn’t the way to ask a favor. Now, you come over here and sit down, and I’ll show you how to do it.”
The boy took the office chair, and his employer picked up his cap and stept outside. He then opened the door softly, and holding the cap in his hand, said, quietly, to the small boy in the big chair:
“Please, sir, there is a ball-game at the park to-day; if you can spare me I would like to get away for the afternoon.”
In a flash the boy responded:
“Why, certainly, Jimmie; and here is fifty cents to pay your way in.” (Text.)
Missionaries must respect local customs of modesty to maintain effective witness.
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The home is where the missionary spends most of the time during the first year. A native of the country to which you go comes in to call, and the first thing noticed may be pictures upon your walls. They may or may not violate the sense of propriety of your caller, but in general one may say that statues, or any pictures approaching the nude, are decidedly out of taste. I recall coming in one Sunday and finding Mrs. Beach hard at work. She was painting, and as we had been brought up as Presbyterians, I was surprized to see her working on Sunday. “Well,” she said, “I must go out to my Sunday-school, and the last time I went they struck. I have been teaching the story of Joseph, and these cartoons of the Religious Tract Society of London represent him with bare calves, and the women simply will not endure them. I have nothing but water-color paints, and I have painted Chinese trousers five times on these legs, and they are bare yet.” We used to have picture-cards sent out by Sunday-school children to help us on in our work. We had to censor those picture-cards, there is no question about that. You can not use every kind of picture-card and preach a pure gospel.--H. P. BEACH, “Volunteer Student Movement,” 1906.
Appropriate dress is crucial for missionaries to avoid offending those they serve.
See RELIGIOUS INFRACTIONS OF PROPRIETY.
PROPRIETY.
PROPRIETY, OBSERVING RULES OF
Leaving the home (in China), you go out into the street, and what is there that first offends your friends--those whom you have come to help? Very possibly it is your dress. You do not have enough of it oftentimes. One function of garments is to conceal the form, and many modes of dress do not conceal but simply reveal it. While we are to remember this, going to the other extreme and walking the streets in bathrobe coats is also questionable. Anything approaching decolleté would weaken a woman’s influence, even if she appeared thus only on a state occasion.
Over against this lack of dress is too much dress, which is quite as offensive. I saw the other day a photograph of Governor Tuan, one of the two commissioners who have just been visiting the United States. He sat in his yamen surrounded by some missionaries and other foreigners living in the governor’s province. It was a very beautiful picture, but one of the missionaries in the group, who was stylishly drest, had a cane--a dapper little pipe-stem cane in China! To Governor Tuan there could be no rational explanation of that sort of thing. If it had been a staff and the missionary had been lame, it would have been appropriate. But he was not lame, no beggars were allowed in the governor’s yamen, there were no dogs to bite him, and why in the world should this man bring a cane? It was just as if native Australians were being received by President Roosevelt and had brought with them boomerangs. Boomerangs have their place, but not in the White House; and to swing a cane causes trouble for China missionaries. Glasses are a necessity, but the missionary to the Chinese unconsciously offends high officials by his glasses, especially if he does not remove them when greeting the official. Many, even of the older missionaries, do not know such a fact as that.--H. P. BEACH, “Student Volunteer Movement,” 1906.
Believers must remain distinct and not lose their influence by conforming to the world.
A person who was once striving. to shield from reproof those Christians who love worldly society, said to another: “You know believers are called to be the salt of the earth.” “Yes,” said the other, “but if the salt be cast into the ocean, from whence it was taken, it will melt away and vanish.”
Gentle but firm rebuke can correct slander and promote godly speech.
The Rev. B. Jacobs, of Cambridgeport, could, when necessary, administer reproof very forcibly, though the gentleness of his character was always seen in the manner in which it was done. Some young ladies at his house were one clay talking about one of their female friends. As he entered the room, he heard the epithets "odd," "singular," &c., applied. He asked and was told the name of the young lady in question, and then said, very gravely, "Yes, she is an odd young lady; she is a very odd young lady; I consider her extremely singular." He then added very impressively, "She was never heard to speak ill of an absent friend." The rebuke was not forgotten by those who heard it.
Courtesy reflects sweet and gracious character that honors others and new leadership.
Charles W. Eliot introduced [at Harvard] a system of discipline based upon personal loyalty to college interests. It is related that at a faculty meeting shortly after he had been inducted into office, one of the faculty asked him with considerable severity the reason for this doing away with time-honored rules of discipline, when the young president replied, with great sweetness and courtesy, “The reason is, we have a new president.”--JAMES T. WHITE, “Character Lessons.”
Courtesy is a voluntary act of respect, not merely an obligation or formality.
See KINDNESS.
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The Brooklyn _Eagle_ has an office boy whose name, let us say, is Joe. The other day Joe was present when the wife of a member of the staff called to see her husband. The latter, having just returned from lunch, deferentially greeted the lady by raising his hat. Joe contemplated this act of courtesy with that fine scorn which office boys feel for all obligations that are not compulsory. “Huh!” he remarked to a companion. “You’d think them two was strangers!”
Courtesy to others requires personal discipline and sometimes difficult correction to maintain.
Probably few people know it, but the institution of the bell-cord, by which the engineman is signaled to stop his train, was due to the courtesy of a conductor. A general passenger agent told the story the other day. Back in the fifties, when wood was still used for fuel in locomotives, the conductor on a local train rigged up a bell-cord so that he could let passengers off at will. The stop signal was given too often for the engineman, who finally became so annoyed that he cut the rope. At the next stop the conductor went forward to the engine cab.
“Jim,” he said, “I’m going to treat my passengers right. You tie up that bell-cord, and if you cut it again I’ll punch your head.”
The engineman cut the cord again, and the conductor, who valued his reputation for courtesy to passengers, went forward and delivered the promised thrashing. Conductors nowadays, tho, are not quite so primitive in their methods, and are not obliged to administer personal discipline to fellow employés.--Buffalo _Evening News_.
