Brokenness - The Gateway to a Spirit filled Life

I want to start by echoing what brother over just said I talked to some of you this morning last night seemed like people were nervous about what they were going to share the one minute they're going to testify I just say what this one word of encouragement Paul says in 2nd Corinthians 12 verse 9 the Lord's power will be perfected in your weakness his grace is sufficient for you and the Lord's power will be perfected in your weakness of your weakness today is stage fright or nervousness claim this promise the Lord's power and his boldness will be perfected in that weakness in fact if you're coming with your personality to share and perhaps the Lord's not going to be glorified or his power is not going to be an imperfect sharing but it's coming from a place of weakness it will truly be a perfect sharing so claim that promise I believe it will be true what an even though I just attended the latter half of this what a amazing time yesterday during the praise and worship time Lord convicted me and told me I brought you here not so much to encourage the youth that was a secondary purpose about the primary purpose I brought you here was for you for me to be encouraged and I praise God to just see the faith the sincerity in each of you all of you in different stages regardless of your past regardless of when you last sinned or how long your sinless streak is a how violent sinner you think of yourself in terms of your repentance I see in each of your sincerity to offer that to the Lord and to be cleansed and be clothed in his righteousness so as we think about this time here and again continuing what shared think about how we go back from here who knows who said this in the Old Testament somebody in the Old Testament said how awesome is this place surely God was here anybody know Jacob right and so this is our this could be our attitude when we come to a place like this like I'll see if you come here for five days and our responses how awesome is this place this is surely the house of God how awesome is this place this is surely the house of God but we know what we do what do we know about Jacob's life after that that Jacob say this after he wrestled with God Jacob said this on his way when he was fleeing to his uncle's home and we know from the story of his life after that that he actually lost sight of the fact that the house of God he didn't take that Bethel with him he was trying to control his circumstances in the way it was this whole contention between him and his father-in-law and we're trying to like you know work out a deal with the sheep and then work out a deal with the daughters and the wives and he really did not relinquish control in that that attitude of how awesome this place is stayed at Bethel and didn't go with him to Laban's house and it was only much later when he came back that he actually experienced and I believe that it actually persisted so what I want to share a little bit about today is about how we can have that attitude like Olu was sharing about having that stay with us and not having this linger we can all come from this retreat and say what an awesome place God was and it's a dangerous statement because Jacob made the same statement and we know what happened in the days after that for many years after that in fact and this can be true we know there's a story in John chapter 5 of Jesus going to the pool of Bethesda to heal a person who was there but that picture of the pool of Bethesda is interesting it's a picture of you know the angel it says the angel would come in certain seasons and stir up the water and that could be the picture of your lives today you come to a youth retreat, a singles retreat and you're stirred up and then the season goes away and certain that that season passes and it just becomes a pool. Then you come to another retreat and you're stirred up and it becomes a pool. What is God's promise for us? Is God's promise for us to be a pool of living water? God's promise is for us to have that receiving from the fountain of the Lord flowing out to be a river of living water constantly.

It's constantly flowing. It's not stirred up in certain seasons and then back to being a pool. And it's not just satisfied with itself, it has to flow out to others from what the Lord has done for us.

So I want to talk a little bit about how we can get there. Let me ask another question. Do you know who made this statement in the Bible? A very humble statement.

It says, I am unworthy of all the loving-kindness and of all the faithfulness which you have shown to your servant. Anybody know? I am unworthy of all the loving-kindness and of all the faithfulness which you have shown to your servant. Always got it.

I heard it from there. Shout it out. It was Jacob again.

It was Jacob again. Not a really humble statement. I am unworthy of all the loving-kindness and of all the faithfulness which you have shown to your servant.

Guess when he made the statement. It's interesting. He made the statement before he wrestled with God.

Which tells me that he thought he was a fool. He thought he was a fool. He thought he was a fool.

He thought he was a fool. He thought he was a fool. He thought he was a fool.

He thought he was a fool. He thought he was a fool. He thought he was a fool.

He thought he was a fool. He thought he was a fool. He thought he was a fool.

He thought he was a fool. He thought he was a fool. He thought he was a fool.

He thought he was a fool. He thought he was a fool. He thought he was a fool.

He thought he was a fool. He thought he was a fool. He was a humble broken man before he wrestled with God.

And to some extent, he was a humble broken man. His relationship with his father-in-law had broken him. Him having to work 14 years, hard labor to get to have his wife, have his children.

He was a broken man to some extent. But yet the Lord had something far greater as we know in terms of brokenness. And today, you might say, Lord, you have broken me through these trials and through these circumstances.

And you may make a statement like this and you may say, I am unworthy of all the loving-kindness and all the faithfulness which you have shown to your servant. And the Lord has something greater. Just maybe tomorrow morning, you're going to wrestle with Him and He's going to show you something greater about how unbroken you are in a certain area.

And if you look at the rest of that verse in Genesis chapter 32, we can turn there. Genesis chapter 32. Stay here for a little bit.

It says in verse 10. Yeah, this is the verse I read. I'm unworthy of all the loving-kindness and all the faithfulness which you have shown to your servant.

For with my staff only I crossed the Jordan and now I have become two companies. He's giving gratitude to the Lord but you can sense a little bit of his pride even though he's giving credit to the Lord of saying I have two companies now. But what was his... It's interesting that he mentions this word staff there.

I see it that when he crossed in the Jordan, he had almost a despising for that staff. Oh, I just started with just a staff. But now I have two companies.

I just started with a poor meager staff. That was nothing. And now I have two companies.

And we know the rest of the story, right? It says in Hebrews 11.21 that by faith Jacob, as he was dying, worshipped and leaning on his staff. That staff which he despised. In the midst of two companies, the staff which he despised has said like, Oh, I just only crossed this river and I had nothing.

Practically nothing. The staff, practically nothing became the most indispensable thing to him. And we may not realize it but there are things that we have not let go to the Lord.

We're like, I don't need to let that go. God doesn't need that part. And the Lord is trying to reach out to us and say, I'm the only thing that's indispensable to you.

You need to lean on me like Jacob had to lean on the staff. That area of your life which you have not relinquished to me. Those two companies of men that you think like, okay, yeah, yeah, you thank the Lord for it, but you take a little pride in it.

What is that in your life? What is it that the Lord is maybe convicting you of saying, you have not surrendered this to control... To my complete control. And if we go on to the rest of that passage, it's interesting. I just want to share a few of the lessons of how brokenness and growth in brokenness is the pathway to victory.

Is the pathway to being in the presence of the Lord every day. Growth and brokenness is that pathway to being filled with the Holy Spirit. To the extent I am broken.

To the extent I am emptied out. To that extent the Lord will fill me. Maybe the Lord has filled you this weekend.

He has a greater filling for you. We'll talk about that in a second. To the extent that you're broken, He's going to fill you up.

So if you look at verse... We'll go on to the passage where Jacob wrestles with the Lord and it says, Jacob was left alone. I love this picture. We see this about Jesus also.

As long as Jacob was... Jacob's experiences with the Lord were always when he was alone, meditating with the Lord, sunrise, sundown, whenever it was, spending time with the Lord alone. And we see, we know that from the life of Jesus. I was reading this in the Word of the Week last week where it says... I think it said, many people go into new towns looking for a hotel to stay in.

Jesus went into new towns looking for a secluded mountain to go and be with the Lord. That's the attitude we can have. And the first thing here was that Jacob was alone and that was his encounter with the Lord.

We can read from verse 24 onwards and it says, and a man wrestled with him until daybreak. He wrestled with God and when he saw that he had not prevailed against Him, he touched the socket of his thigh and the socket of Jacob's thigh was dislocated. I love that word, touch.

When you think of the touch of God, what do you think about? I want to be touched by God today. Thinking about healing, you're thinking about restoration. Lord, touch me.

Lord, touch me today. Meet with me today and touch me. Have you seen the touch of the Lord as just a touch to break you? Think about that the next time you pray to the Lord and say, Lord, touch me today.

Lord, touch me to break me, to break that part of me that is so self-dependent, that part of my life. Maybe I've given up certain parts of my life and relinquished to the Lord, but there's this part of my life, there's this job, there's these requirements I have for a spouse, there's these things I have to, like, oh, I need to be in this location, I can't move out of here. Oh, there's my personality, I mean, I can't, I can't, I can't who I am.

And the Lord is saying, I want to touch you, break you a little bit in that regard. Yeah. Not, don't change it, but surrender to my control.

Maybe, let me change it if I choose to change it. Let me decide the priorities or the prerequisites that you need to have in a spouse or your job, your finances. Let me be in control of your plans for your future and your retirement plan.

Verse 26, as he's wrestling with the Lord, Jacob says, let me go for the dawn, oh, the angel says to him, let me go for the dawn is breaking. And he says, I will not let you go unless you bless me. Jacob was contending with the Lord.

And I like to picture this word contending and wrestling with the Lord as an ongoing, we talked about it as wrestling being prayer, but I also like to think of it as a progressive breaking. The Lord is contending means there's contention, which means there's something of my will that's going up against something of God's will. And I like to see persistence, like we talked about the widow persistence and prayer as I persist in prayer for something rather than the desire, rather than just the outcome being that thing that I'm persisting in each step in that journey of persistence.

The Lord is revealing to me something of like, yeah, I keep persisting in me, but have you let go of this as you persist? Keep persisting me in seeking for a spouse or seeking for that job or seeking for that prayer to be answered. But as you're persisting in each step, are you being a little broken? Is your hip joint a little dislocated? Is your elbow joint a little dislocated? Is that part, is there more brokenness in that persistence? And Jacob said to him, what is your name? And he said, no, the angel says, what is your name? And he said, Jacob. And he said, your name shall not be Jacob, verse 28, but Israel for you've striven with God and with man and have prevailed.

Let me ask you a question. Who won this wrestling match? What does the word prevailed mean? Prevailed means victorious, right? It's a no-brainer, right? Who won the wrestling match? If we look at it from any, anybody reading the Bible is like, hey, God certainly won that wrestling match, right? And look at the attitude of God to Jacob. You won.

You prevailed. And I want each of you, young people, to take that attitude as you go into the next days of your life. As the Lord breaks you through trials, don't look at that as defeat.

As the Lord restores you in repentance from the sin that is chaining you and He restores you in repentance and you feel so overwhelmed. You feel, you still have, feel the devil comes in with a little bit of condemnation and you feel broken. I want to tell you here today in faith, brokenness is victory.

Brokenness is not defeat. Brokenness is victory. Succumbing and wallowing in sin is defeat.

But if the Lord has stirred your heart into repentance like He did Peter when Peter denied Him and then mourned and wept bitterly, the mourning and the weeping bitterly is victory. Don't see it under the wind. I want to say it as the Lord said to Jacob, you have contended with me and I have broken you with my touch and you have won.

You are victorious. That's the word of the Lord today for us. Brokenness is the secret of victory.

And then verse 30, Jacob named the place Peniel for he said, which means I've seen God face to face, yet my life has been preserved. And today I want to challenge you. Have you seen the face of God this retreat? Hopefully we talked about, you know, we'll talk about that Bible taught and spirit taught.

The spirit taught person sees the face of God. And tomorrow when you go back to work, when you go back to school, challenge yourself to cry out to the Lord and say, I want to see your face. Change the name of your company.

I work for a company named Oracle. You may go to a school called the King's Academy or you might be going to UC Irvine, whichever college you're going to and say, that's not my school, that's not my college, that's not my workplace. I work for, I work at Peniel.

I study at Peniel. What does that mean? I study at the place I work. We know that verse which says, do your work as of unto the Lord.

Work as of unto the Lord, not for men. In fear and trembling, not in fear and trembling of your boss, in fear and trembling of God. Make it your desire to say, the place I work for is the place where I'm going to see the face of God.

I'm going to name that place Peniel. I'm going to change it. I'm going to go into work.

I'm going to go into college tomorrow and say, I'm taking classes at Peniel because my desire here is not just to study, get a good job. That's my secondary. My desire is to see the face of God today in the circumstances.

The Lord's made that clear that in the verses that you don't work for that boss. You don't work for that company. You work for him.

You don't study at that institution. You study for him. And that's the challenge I want to set before you today.

In Hosea, it talks about Jacob. Hosea 12, it says, it actually came to a point of maturity for him to wrestle with God. And I believe all of us now can, as we grow in maturity, we may have started with that first Bethel experience.

How awesome is this place? And as we grow in maturity, the Lord is saying, I want something more with you. I want to touch you. I want to dislocate that hip socket.

I want you to lean on that staff that you despised. I want you to, the area of my life where you didn't want to relinquish control and you despised having any relinquishing of control. I got this.

I'm in control of this. Don't worry about this. The Lord's saying, no, you need to lean on me in that area too.

Hebrews 12 verse 1 and 2 says, we run this race. We think when you see one of the responses, you know, many of the young people have come to us and I always thank you for pouring out into our lives. But it's not important.

It's not sufficient enough to be just be thankful. The Bible says, remember those who have led you and appreciate them, thank them. No, it doesn't say that.

It says, observing their conduct, imitate their faith. So as you see godly brothers, as you young people, teenagers see youth here who are walking with the Lord, as if some of you are going to see godly elders around you who are leading you. Not sufficient enough to just be thankful and appreciative.

Imitate their faith. And that's why Hebrews 12 verse 1 and 2, you've got these cloud of witnesses. It's not enough for you to just say like, thank you Lord for the cloud of witnesses.

No, run the race. Shut off the sin that would so easily entangle you. Every encumbrance that is entangling you, shut it off.

And how do you do that? Fixing your eyes on Jesus. Seeing the face of God. Run that race.

Every step being a penny of a moment. Fixing your eyes on Jesus. Seeing his face.

And that's the race we're called to run. That is the way we are going to experience the fullness of the spirit. I want to move on to another example of brokenness in the Bible, which is Job.

We know, we all heard a little bit about this. We can turn to Job 40 as we get started. Job chapter 40.

I'll read from a couple of chapters there. Job was one who was completely broken, as we know, by Satan's request to remove the hedge around his family. Remove the hedge around his health.

Remove the hedge around his possessions. And this actually matches very well to the cost of discipleship we read in Luke 14. Are you willing to deny yourself, take up your cross? Are you willing to love me more than you love your family? Are you willing to love me more than you love your attachment to these possessions on this earth? Job was truly tested in discipleship, if you think of it that way.

Children died. Possessions removed. Really challenged in terms of having to deny himself with boils on his body.

Imagine having to go out and use a thing to scrape himself. This was possibly the richest man on earth at that time. And then even went through a period of complaining against God.

And then finally comes to a point of repentance. And Job chapter 40 verses 2-4 says, Will the fall finder, that's me, contend with the Almighty? The Lord says to Job, will the fall finder, and there's that word, contend again. Contending with, it's okay to have that conversation with God.

Don't look. Even if you have a conversation of why with the Lord, that's okay. But it must progress.

That contending must progress. You can't be asking why the next day. Why this trial? That must progress to, Lord, I believe you will deliver me from this trial.

Not only will you deliver me from this trial, you will use this to burn up the cords that are binding me. You will use this to glorify your name. Even Jesus said, take this cup from me.

That was the first statement he made, take this cup from me. He didn't go straight to glorify your name. But if it's your will, glorify your name.

And I love that word, contending with the, but it must progress into brokenness. And verse 3, Job's response to that says, Job was finally broken. He says, Lord, I am insignificant.

I lay my hand on my mouth. And there comes a point in brokenness where you come to a point where it's like, Lord, I am insignificant. My wishes for a job and a spouse and a material benefit and all of these things, getting into a good college, getting a good, having friends, even having a good church, I am insignificant, Lord.

I put my hand on my mouth. You know. You know all things.

And the Lord wants to bring us to that point of complete brokenness, complete insignificance. And if you move on to chapter 42, Job chapter 42, Job responds and says back to the Lord. Verse 4 says, Job chapter 42 verse 4 says, Hear now and I will speak.

I will ask you and you will instruct me. I have heard of you by the hearing of the ear. How many of you had heard of the Lord before you came here this weekend? Some of you grew up in CFC homes.

Some of you had heard great theology. This is what the article we read from Tozer about being Bible taught, being Bible taught with good theology, good doctrine, intellectual stimulation. That's hearing of the Lord.

That's what Job's saying. I've heard of you with the ear. I've heard of you with the ear.

But, verse 5, but now my eyes see you. What did it take for Job's eyes to see the Lord? It was not great doctrine and great theology and this preacher talking about the tribulation or this preacher talking about eternal security and how you believe about this and arguments about that. That just stimulates your head.

That's not going to, that's not going to give you that Peniel moment of seeing the Lord. That's just hearing Him. That's being taught by the Bible.

You are not going to be filled with the Spirit by more knowledge. We saw those two circles yesterday. Growing that outer circle does no good for you if you don't grow in brokenness, grow in the smaller circle of saying, now my eyes see you.

It took this complete breaking of Job for him to say, I had heard of you when I was rich. I was a righteous man. You even call me the most righteous and upright man, but I had not seen you.

I had heard about you and that drove me to uprightness, but now I see you. That's the experience. Perhaps you've seen the Lord this weekend.

From what you've heard, from the way the Lord has convicted you and broken you. It's not content to just say, I have seen the Lord. We've got present continuous tense yesterday in the new covenant.

Are you seeing the Lord today? Are you seeing the face of the Lord today? And it's really important that we combat this thirst for knowledge because it will distract us from being brokenness. In fact, it will puff up our pride even more. Not only will it take away from the area of our life where the Lord wants to break us, it will build it on a new area that will puff us up in pride and will then need to be broken further.

Paul says in 2 Corinthians 11, I pray that I'm afraid that the serpent will deceive you like he deceived Eve, that you will get away from that simple and pure devotion to the Lord. We can read that verse casually, but what does that verse mean? We jump straight to the simple and pure devotion to the Lord. How about the first part? How did the serpent deceive Eve? The serpent deceived Eve, I believe, by leading her and Adam to the tree of knowledge of good and evil.

Not to the tree of life. And today, what is going to steal your simple and pure devotion to the Lord? It's the tree of knowledge of good and evil. That might come from the knowledge of good and evil as a psychologist might tell you, or as your friends in school might tell you, or social media tells you what is right or wrong.

Stand up for this social cause. Stand up for this right-wing cause. Stand up for this left-wing cause.

Stand up for this welfare cause or stand up for your own right. Tree of knowledge of good and evil. One type of tree of knowledge of good and evil.

Maybe not even that. Maybe it is theologically, no, this is not accurate. I need to contend with this.

Your doctrine is inaccurate. I need to challenge you on your doctrine. Tree of knowledge of good and evil.

What is the opposite of the tree of knowledge of good and evil? Simple and pure devotion. Simple and pure devotion to the Lord. I've used this analogy before.

I would rather be a five-year-old child who has no clue about the inner workings of the body. He might think there's plastic inside his body for all he knows, but he's got life. Ah, skin and bones.

Can I explain how the heart pumps blood and how the nervous system works and how it connects to my brain and how electrical signals are sent to my fingers and how fingers work together? Five-year-old child can't explain it. Maximum he can explain is skin and bones and maybe a heartbeat. I'd rather be that five-year-old child than to be a doctor who's on his deathbed, about to die, but can tell you everything that's wrong with him.

Okay, I've got this cancer here and this cell is mutating and that's how this happening is here and tomorrow I'm dead. Which one do you want to be? Do you want to be the one who can explain the body function, that's the outer circle, perfectly? Or do you want to be the one that's growing in life, even if you can't explain it? There's many who never understood the power of the baptism of the Holy Spirit, but their ministry is evidence that they were filled with the Holy Spirit, even though they didn't preach that theology. Would you rather have the perfect theology about the baptism of the Holy Spirit? Oh, that church does not believe in the gifts of the Spirit, so this church doesn't believe in this and you pride yourself like, oh, we believe in the gifts of the Holy Spirit.

But are you actually filled with the Holy Spirit? Let me suggest that there's people in that church without knowing it who are filled with the Holy Spirit and you with your perfect theology over here are defeated in sin because you have not experienced the face of the Lord through your brokenness. I remember I had this poem personal experience when I first came to the US. I'd given my life to Jesus.

I was saturated with CFC theology. I was brother Zach's son and I came to college and my roommate in college was a good Christian brother. He was a Presbyterian.

He was baptized as a child, not baptized as an adult, did not believe in the baptism of the Holy Spirit. And you can see where I'm going with this. My immediate response was like, okay, I can teach him a lot about doctrine and theology.

Okay, it's going to make for some great evening conversations and bedtime conversations as we're talking together. And it did. And he was like, bro, I'm so thankful for you sharing these words.

And I was like, okay, I'm glad I'm Lord. I'm glad that like Jacob, I'm glad that you've given me two companies. Now I'm glad that you're allowing me to be a blessing to this person.

And as the weeks went by, I saw that I was still defeated in sin. And this brother, no great intellectual theology or being able to explain doctrine and will get willing to welcome and embrace good doctrine that I was giving him. And I was like, wow, that's amazing.

Wow, you really know the scripture well. And I mistook that for life. But he had a simple and pure devotional life.

He was more joyful. There was a smile on his face. He was he was more peaceful.

I was more disturbed. I was more frustrated. I was more envious of what he had.

And the Lord used that to break me and say, all of that means nothing. The scribe who does not become a disciple, is that verse right in Matthew, it says, the scribe becomes a disciple, bring out old treasure and new treasure. If you don't become a disciple, the scribe does not become a disciple and see the face of the Lord.

He's just pulling out junk, no old treasure, no new treasure, just junk. Of course, great theology is great. Jesus said, right, the scribe who becomes a disciple, he's got all kinds of treasures.

But he must become a disciple first. And I was, the Lord used that to remind me of going back to Sunil, you've been feeding at the tree of knowledge of good and evil. And that's why you're defeated.

You've not come to me with a simple and pure devotion. You've not come to me to in brokenness. And that brother was far with his inferior theology, perhaps he was far closer to the throne of God.

He was far superior as a child, as a Christian in his walk with God, it is in his eternal life as we are the knowledge of God, we can have eternal life, we can have a heaven here on earth, eternal life. He was far closer to the throne of God, far closer to his knowledge of God than I was with all of my knowledge of the Bible and good theology. Let's move to another example, which is David.

I'll be in Psalm 63, we can turn there. Let's talk a little bit about David. David, again, similar journey.

Samuel comes to him, youngest in the family, passed off by all his older siblings, just kind of like, ah, he's the little kid. Okay, we've got to do important army duty, we've got to do important logistical duty. Let him take care of the sheep.

That's a good ministry for him. Learned brokenness by being a shepherd. Got anointed to be king.

Defeated Goliath. This person is, wow, his ministry is really taking off right now. He of all people should say, I'm chosen of God.

I'm anointed. I'm the king. I defeated Goliath.

What more could that be? I mean, that's it. I've learned everything there is to be about brokenness as being a shepherd, taking care of sheep. That's it, okay, I've graduated from brokenness, now I'm anointed king, right? The Lord Himself has anointed me.

And He proved it by showing me how He gave me victory in this area. How He helped me defeat Goliath. And I give Him the credit, but He has shown me that.

What happens in the, we know the story of David. After he is chosen to be king, he is not king. He's chased around by Saul in the wilderness.

Some of the most, I would go so far to say that the challenge that David faced in the wilderness, running away from Saul, was a far greater challenge than Goliath. And that's the thing, I mean, as the Lord convicts you, you might think like, oh, this is the big thing I've got to overcome. And the Lord is trying to show you, no, I've got something far greater for you.

Your anxiety, your pride, you're seeking the approval of men. You think, okay, I don't fornicate, but yeah, a casual look with my eyes, oh, no problem there. The Lord's saying, no, I've got something far greater for you.

Psalm chapter 63, this is written, this psalm is written right in the midst of where he's just running around. There's literally a passage where he says, Saul went on one side of the mountain, David ran around on the other side. He's literally playing hide and seek in fear of Saul.

And this verse is written from that place of complete need. Finally, he's come to a point of brokenness. And of course, we know as the story of David goes on, there's a new level of brokenness that Psalm 51 is written from where he has sinned and he's being restored.

And the Lord restores him there. And even there, he has the forevision to say, Lord, when I repented, help me to be a comfort to other transgressors. You can read that in Psalm 51 sometime.

But this is earlier on, Psalm 63, it says, from this barren place, it says in verse 1, O God, you are my God. I shall seek you earnestly. My soul thirsts for you in a dry and weary land.

He's literally in a dry and weary land. And what has the Lord taught him? What does he thirst for? He doesn't say, Lord, Lord, give me a drink of water. Give me some food miraculously.

Meet my physical need. We can bargain with God. There's one passage when we go back to Jacob for a second.

Right after Jacob says, this is an awesome place, Bethel, God's presence is certainly here. The very next two verses, if you go back there, I think it's Genesis 28, the very next couple of verses, he says, Lord, I will honor you and I will bless you if you meet my physical needs. And we can bargain with the Lord that way, saying, Lord, I will really bless you if you deliver me from this trial.

And the Lord is teaching us and wants us to come to the place that David was, which was saying, no, in your trial, thirst for me. Imagine being in this wilderness and saying, I am not going to thirst for water, which is the most basic necessity I need. I'm not going to thirst for deliverance of the trial.

Yes, I want that too. But that's secondary to me thirsting for you. I thirst for you in this dry and weary land.

I don't thirst for something that would satisfy me physically. I thirst for you. That's what's going to satisfy me spiritually.

And then verse 5, it says, My soul is satisfied as with marrow and fatness, and my mouth offers praises with joyful lips. Marrow, it's like a delicacy, like he's literally, he's talking about the most abundant feast. Not only is the Lord just giving, wetting his whistle, so to speak, or just touching his dry lips.

He's saying, My soul in this wilderness, in this dry place, I'm experiencing a feast. I'm experiencing a banquet amidst my enemies. Amidst this sin that I'm battling, I believe you will give me a feast.

Because you have now broken me through this and I believe you will, you have emptied me and now I believe you will fill me up. And that should be our response from trials. Sharing this with a couple of the brothers yesterday.

It's a great, great memory to think about. We don't have to turn there, but I'll talk briefly about the trial that Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego had to go through when they were thrown into the fire. What was the biggest miracle in that trial? Many would say, the Sunday School answer is they went into the fire and they came out unburnt.

Let me show you a couple other miracles that are potentially bigger. It says that they went into that fire. Yes, they came out unburnt.

But there was, and as you're thinking about this, think about the progression as you pray to the Lord. The first question can be like, Why, Lord, why are you allowing this fire? And then you progress from that to saying, Lord, deliver me from this fire so that I can come out unburnt. Deliver me from this trial.

Good prayer to pray. Then there's the next level where the other miracles that happened in that fire. They came out and it says, not only was their body unburnt, there was one thing that was burnt.

It was the cords that were binding them. And truly believe this, the trial that the Lord is leading you through is meant for perhaps your dependence on Him. And you having that Peniel moment and seeing His face and His breaking you will bring you deliverance in a supernatural way from something else that's binding you.

Just like we heard when the angel came up to Peter and said, Stand up. He obeyed and stood up and his chains fell off. In the same way, when they were thrown into the fire, they're like, Oh, Lord, deliver us from this trial.

But the Lord has a greater prayer. Lord, deliver me from these cords that are binding me while they're in this trial. Teach me a greater dependence on You.

And the next level, they saw the face, the greatest miracle, they saw the face of God as the fourth person in that fire. So I want to challenge you as you're going through these trials, as you're going through these wildernesses in your life, don't settle for the prayer that says, deliver me from this trial. Move on to saying, Lord, I do not want this to pass me by.

I do not want this brokenness that to pass me by without You blessing me and without seeing Your face. What is the common theme in these things that I've shared? David saw the face of God. Job says, I saw Your face.

Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego saw the face of God. David, even though he doesn't say that words, experienced the presence of God. And in a way, saw the face of God.

Jesus saw the face of God. Us running the race before the cloud of witnesses, seeing the face of God every single day. And we see this in the life of Jesus as well.

Jesus had, who is the most broken person? It says, sin can help us lead to brokenness. But it's not just sin. Jesus was the humblest person on this earth.

And He didn't need to sin to become the humblest person. He didn't need to repent from sin to be the humblest person. The Lord, the trials that He went through, He was tempted at all points as we were.

And it says, it pleased the Father to crush Him. Isaiah 53 says it, it pleased the Father to break Him. And it pleases the Lord as we are sharing in His sufferings to break us and to break us as He broke Jesus.

And Jesus learned to depend on Him. And it's a picture we must see of Jesus. We see Jesus as the forgiver of our sins.

Good starting point. Good starting point is we give our life to Jesus. He forgave our sins.

We have a ticket to heaven. Now in our new covenant church, we see Jesus as the Savior who is saving us from sin. I want to challenge you to see Jesus as the capital F forerunner.

How did He run this race? He ran this race not as a king elevated, as a spiritual leader put up on a pedestal. As a person who says, John 5.30, John 8 again says it, I can't do anything on my own initiative. I can't do anything.

The Son of God could not do anything. Have you seen this picture of the helpless Jesus? The helpless Jesus who is completely dependent on His Father. I can't do anything on my own initiative.

I've come here not to do my own will but to do the will of my Father. It says, Hebrews 5.10 I think it says, Hebrews 5.7 and 8 it says, He in the days of His flesh He offered up loud crying and tears to His Father who was able to save Him from spiritual death. God as man, Son of God and man, loud crying and tears.

If He's my forerunner, have I offered up loud crying and tears for not for the deliverance from the trial but for this thing that is going to lead me into spiritual death. The Bible knowledge is going to lead me into spiritual death. This casual attitude of my eyes that I've not offered up to Him that's going to lead me into spiritual death.

This casual attitude of my tongue that's going to lead me into spiritual death. That's the way Jesus prayed. And then it says in 1 Peter 2 at the end, we heard this from Brother Olu yesterday in one of the questions and answers.

We have this example of meekness and quietness from Jesus in 1 Peter 3 where it says, where it encourages wives and husbands of men and women to have meek and quiet spirit, to live in an understanding way. Following whose example, the previous chapter 1 Peter 2, Jesus who did not utter a word but constantly entrusted Himself to the Father. The example of Jesus was not one, you don't see Him as victorious outside of seeing Him constantly entrusting Himself to the Father, constantly dependent on the Father, constantly looking for secluded mountains to go and cry out to the Lord.

That's the picture of Jesus and that's the culture of heaven as I shared in the earlier sharing session. Jesus continued that picture of dependence on the Father and handing off His authority when He came to heaven, girding Himself to serve even in heaven. That's the culture of heaven.

It's not that we stay, we take that spirit of brokenness and God's calling us victorious. We take that spirit of brokenness all the way up to heaven. I want to end with a couple of promises that I believe the Lord has for us.

Before I go there, the theme of this youth retreat has been living in God's will as a single person. Actually we can turn there, Romans chapter 12 verses 1 and 2, this verse has been quoted. This chapter actually talks about proving God's will.

We can think about how do I know God's will and we can have, you know, as we've heard, we can read the book Finding God's Will or the small little handout with the 12 points, Proving God's Will. But those are pointers that are meant to lead us to a spirit-filled life. But where does that spirit-filled life start with Romans chapter 12 verses 1 says, By the mercies of God, that means God Himself is being merciful to even allow you to do this, present your bodies as a living and holy sacrifice acceptable to God.

And as we heard through the Q&A session, it's piece by piece like the ox getting cut up. Offer your eyes. This is the temple of the Holy Spirit.

Offer your mouth, offer your fingers, offer your hands, your feet, your voice, your mind. Offer them every day as a holy sacrifice acceptable to God. And that's the spiritual service of worship.

As opposed to be, verse 2, conform to this world, the world will tell you to operate. No, stand up for yourself, stand up for your rights, believe in yourself, forgive yourself, love yourself. That's not what this verse is talking about.

That's the way of the world. Pleasure yourself a little. It's okay, a little indulgence.

You're only human. It's an excuse. Guess who else was only human? Jesus Christ, my forerunner.

Only human. And He is my example of a victorious life. How? Not through striving.

Through complete brokenness and through entrusting Himself to the Father. But be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Every day have your heart, the spirit be renewed.

Seek to be filled with the Holy Spirit. Seek to be grow in brokenness so that you may prove the will of God. That's how you prove the will of God.

You're asking, I don't know the will of God in this matter, I don't know the will of God in this matter. Brother, sister, I don't know the will of God or who you're supposed to marry or where, which college you're supposed to go to or whether this job is good for you or whether you should do this or that. Give you some guidance, give you some advice.

I don't know the will of God. I do know that the will of God is proved in all of the above in if you offer up your body as a living sacrifice to Him every day. Let me end with this promise that the Lord says as we talk about us not being, how do we go from being a pool of, a pool that is stirred up in certain seasons to being a river that's flowing of living water.

How do we go from the light of God shining in us? It says the path of the righteous. Proverbs 4 says the path of the righteous is meant to be like the sun growing all the way to the noonday sun, growing and growing. How do I get brighter? How do I grow in brokenness so that I can grow in the filling of the Holy Spirit? Isaiah chapter 30.

Just two passages I'll leave with you. Isaiah chapter 30, beautiful chapter that I encourage you to meditate on in terms of the new covenant. This is a passage that talks about the Holy Spirit where the Lord is saying I will no longer give you the bread of privation and oppression.

After you've been broken I will give you the Holy Spirit that is going to be this voice behind you in verse 21 that says this is the way walk in it. But the verse I want to read is down in verse 30, sorry verse 26. As you grow in the fullness of the Holy Spirit, as you start hearing this voice behind you saying the voice of the Holy Spirit saying this is the way walk in it, proving the will of God.

It finally culminates with verse 30 which says, sorry verse 26 which says the light, picture this, your light, your light is perhaps a flicker right now. Now it's becoming a spark and perhaps it's like the light of the moon. And the Lord says the light of the moon will become like the light of the sun.

Proclaim this in faith. And the light of the sun like the path of the righteous now will become seven times brighter. The light of seven days.

How is that going to happen? On the day the Lord binds up the fractures of His people and heals the bruises inflicted. The Lord does not intend to leave us broken. He does not intend to touch us so that we remain fractured.

He intends to break us so that He can heal us and so that He can fill us up with His Holy Spirit and that's where we will grow into the brightness of seven suns, the brightness of seven days. So claim that on your life and say Lord I know you don't intend to leave me broken. Brokenness is the path to victory.

Brokenness is the path to me becoming the light of seven suns. And God has an even greater purpose which is for us to flow out towards others and that's what Jesus said that out of our innermost beings will flow rivers of living water. The only passage we can correlate to that too it says as the scriptures have said what was he referring to was actually Ezekiel chapter 47 and we can turn there for a second.

The Lord intends for us to not be lakes that are stirred up but to flow out as rivers and here's a progression similar to the light of the moon becoming like the light of the sun. Look at this progression here in Ezekiel chapter 47 which talks about rivers flowing out and it says starting in verse 3 it says I started to see the water flowing out from the temple of God. This is the Holy Spirit being poured out into our life and it reached the ankles.

Perhaps you're perhaps you have one of two responses you're like yeah I have the Holy Spirit see see the river right here it's flowing through my ankles or perhaps your response of saying like Lord I only have a trickle and with either of these responses the correct answer is the Lord has more to give you. Don't be content with that cry out to him and where does it go on from that. Verse 3 it says let him further as the Lord is leading you and the water rises to the ankles rises to the to the knees.

Verse 4 and as the Lord leads him further rises to his waist. This is the picture of the Lord's desire for us to grow in brokenness to fill us more for us to grow from being trickles to streams to eventually waste high rivers. And then it becomes a raging river in verse 5 again measure a thousand it was a river that I could not afford I couldn't even stop it I could not even put a dam on it because it had to flow and what is the purpose of the Lord creating this river that's no longer a pool that's no longer a trickle there's no longer a stream.

It says in verse 9 will come about that every living creature which swamps in this place where the river goes will live and there will be many fish for these wherever these waters go others will become fresh so everything will live wherever this goes. The Lord has a desire not just for your relationship he's got something far greater in brokenness and with filling you with the Holy Spirit. It's to bring life to others to teach them that to not not with words but then seeing your life's and wanting that that they would have a desire for that river and be taught that through brokenness.

Verse 12 the river on its back on one side on the other side will grow all kinds of trees for food their leaves will not cut they will not wither the fruit will not fail they will bear every month because that water flows from the sanctuary from their fruit will be for food and their leaves for nothing because that water flows from God because they're not manufacturing their own waterfall their water is flowing from God it will constantly flow it will bear the fruit of the spirit it will bring life to others. Because it flows from that sanctuary as opposed to verse 11 which is back to the pool of Bethesda which says but in this can we have to be careful to guard ourselves that we don't that we stay with the water flowing from the sanctuary and the Lord is constantly filling us with his Holy Spirit and we've come rivers and we're not content with like yes the Lord fill me up if you can write a date to when the Lord filled you with the Holy Spirit you're in trouble. It's like saying the Lord I filled up my gas tank for the first time 20 years ago what does that mean is your car running today you filled it up 20 years ago guys I want to tell you about this awesome experience about how I drove across the country hundreds of miles and though and I filled up gas at this gas station where's your car right now it's parked in the garage it's broken down but I drove 20 years ago what does that mean? That's and that can happen to us too that's what verse 11 is a warning off it says it's swamps and marshes will not be fresh anymore they'll be left for salt started off as a river ended up as a swamp be careful that we don't be content with calling this place a Bethel and says how awesome was this place the Lord was surely here the Lord was surely there 20 years ago when he filled me with the Holy Spirit what a shame the Lord is here today he wants to meet with you today he wants to show you his face today he wants you to grow and break and brokenness and declare you a victor so that you can say I have seen the face of the Lord here today and so that others can see I see the face of the Lord in this brother I see the face of the Lord in this sister amen