057. Chapter 52: The Seventh Commandment

------------ CHAPTER FIFTY-TWO ------------ The Seventh Commandment Marriage: Divinely Instituted

After having created and adorned the heaven and the earth, God created living creatures. He created many animals at once, but He initially created only one human being -- a man. Subsequently, He caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, during which God removed a rib from him. From this He created a woman, Eve, and brought her to Adam to be his wife. Just as they were first one and subsequently became two, the Lord, by way of marriage, made them one again after this. "And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh" (Mark 10:8). After God had brought Adam and Eve together, He "blessed them, and ... said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth" (Genesis 1:28). Thus, God instituted marriage and gave His blessing upon it, not only prior to the fall, but He also repeated this after the fall (Genesis 3:16;Genesis 9:1). God Himself decrees who one‘s wife will be and gives her to every man (Genesis 24:44). "A prudent wife is from the Lord" (Proverbs 19:14). The Lord Jesus gave His approbation to marriage by honoring a wedding with His presence (John 2:11). Thus, "marriage is honourable in all" (Hebrews 13:4). This is also true for ministers, for Paul calls the prohibition of marriage a doctrine of devils (1 Timothy 4:1), and it is furthermore a sign of the antichrist. Godly ministers, both in the Old and New Testaments, have been married. Aaron was married and had sons (Leviticus 1:7), Samuel was married and had children (1 Samuel 8:2), Peter had a wife (Matthew 8:14), and Paul had license to take a wife, as was also true for the other apostles (1 Corinthians 9:5). As God instituted marriage, the Lord likewise created in man the ability and inclination to procreate. This inclination is good in and of itself, but after the fall everything in man has become corrupted and distorted. Man is also in this respect distorted and frequently desires the means more than the end. Yes, he frequently fears the end, and with heated fervor entertains himself with the means. Consequently he indulges in various sins in this respect, as to both manner and objects -- sins which are forbidden in the seventh commandment. The Sins Prohibited The sins which are forbidden here are numerous. We shall organize them under the following main headings: actions, gestures, words, thoughts, lusts, and opportunities. To unchaste actions belong the following:

First, there is adultery, which occurs when a married man or woman has a relationship with another person -- either married or unmarried. If this sin is committed by two married persons, then there is double adultery. If it is committed by a married and an unmarried person, there is single adultery. Not only does the married person commit adultery, but also the unmarried person.

Secondly, there is the desertion of one‘s spouse without adultery being the cause. "For the Lord, the God of Israel, saith that He hateth putting away" (Malachi 2:16); "Whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery" (Matthew 5:32); "If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases" (1 Corinthians 7:12;1 Corinthians 7:15). If the one spouse commits adultery, then the other spouse may leave the adulterous one, file for divorce, and remarry. The person that has been divorced due to committing adultery may not remarry, and whoever marries such a person also commits adultery. If a spouse divorces rashly, that is, without fornication being the cause, such a spouse will be the cause of sin if the one who has been divorced commits fornication. The one who is the cause of the divorce may not remarry, even though this was practiced in Israel. In such a case, where the sin remained, there was the stipulation that the one who was deserted be given a bill of divorcement (Matthew 19:7). This is, however, contrary to God‘s commandment. "What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder" (Matthew 19:6). The one who has been divorced, however, is not obligated to remain unmarried, but rather is permitted to remarry. However, to divorce for reasons other than fornication is adultery.

Thirdly, there is incest; that is, if persons who are too closely related enter into a relationship, be it outside of marriage or within marriage (although it is no marriage). The blood relationship is too close if the relationship is closer than cousins, that is, the children of brothers and sisters. Marriage between first cousins is not prohibited anywhere. The Lord has left man free in this, and such persons do not need to be secretly troubled about this in their heart. The degrees of relationship which are forbidden are parents with their children and grandchildren, this being true in all generations. It is also considered to be incest if one marries either two sisters or two brothers; that is, the one after the death of the other. It is incestuous to marry children of one‘s sister or brother; that is, if an uncle or an aunt marries someone whose uncle or aunt they are; or if a nephew or niece marries an uncle or an aunt in all descending degrees. To determine who are too near of kin, one must refer to Leviticus 18:6-18 and Leviticus 20:11-12.

Fourthly, there is sodomy; that is, when men have intercourse with men and women with women (cf. Genesis 19:5; Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:26-27). This is also the case when a human being has intercourse with an animal (Leviticus 18:23).

Fifthly, there is fornication; that is, when two single persons engage in intercourse with each other. This is prohibited everywhere (cf. Acts 15:20; 1 Corinthians 6:9; Galatians 5:19). This is aggravated when one has intercourse with various persons and thus is promiscuous, like dogs. This is also true if one uses his home as a brothel, engages prostitutes in the house for that purpose, or uses his home as a trap to allure and entangle all manner of persons. Persons engaging in this are an abomination, as well as those who could prevent this, but fail to do so (Deuteronomy 23:17)!

Sixthly, there is the commission of personal fornication (which Onan was guilty of), also referred to as "evil concupiscence" (Colossians 3:5; 1 Thessalonians 4:5), and uncleanness and lasciviousness (Galatians 5:19).

Seventhly, there is polygamy; that is, to have more than one wife simultaneously. This sin was initially committed by Lamech (Genesis 4:18), and subsequently became common practice among Jews, Gentiles, and Moslems -- both prior to and after the time of Christ. It is, however, contrary to the command and institution of God. "... and they twain shall be one flesh" (Matthew 19:5); "Let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband" (1 Corinthians 7:2). Thus, to have more than one wife is the continual commission of adultery. The fact that it has been common practice, was practiced by the godly themselves, and was tolerated by God at that time, does not negate the sinfulness of these deeds. Fornication

Eighthly, there is concubinage; that is, when two unmarried persons without a lawful relationship live together as husband and wife. This is a continual act of fornication, confessed by the Samaritan woman (John 4:17-18). The rule is this: "But if they cannot contain, let them marry" (1 Corinthians 7:9).

Ninthly, there is premarital intercourse of engaged persons. This is contrary to what Joseph and Mary did (Matthew 1:18), as well as contrary to 1 Corinthians 14:40 : "Let all things be done decently and in order." It is an act of uncleanness. If the man dies, the woman is then considered to be a whore and the child as the child of a whore. It frequently takes away the blessing from the marriage, having been begun in sin.

Unchaste gestures are committed first of all with the eyes; that is, when by way of observation one stirs up and stimulates his own filthy lusts. The Lord Jesus says concerning this: "But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart" (Matthew 5:28; cf. Ezekiel 23:14;Ezekiel 23:16). Peter speaks of "eyes full of adultery" (2 Peter 2:14). One also commits fornication with the eyes if, by ogling or casting lewd glances, one seeks to allure others to commit fornication.

Secondly, sin is also committed by making motions with hands, feet, and other members of the body, revealing one‘s intention in such a way that it is readily understood by others. "Thou hast ... opened thy feet to every one that passed by" (Ezekiel 16:25).

Thirdly, carousing, kissing, and immodest caressing (Ezekiel 23:3;Ezekiel 23:8) belongs to this. "So she caught him, and kissed him" (Proverbs 7:13).

Fourthly, the wearing of inappropriate clothing and the attire of harlots, as well as the making bare of those members which for decency‘s sake ought to be covered, also belongs to this. This is the manifestation of a heart that is bent on fornication and on alluring others to indulge in it.

Verbal unchastity is committed by recounting stories or fables that relate to fornication, by using indecent language, and by reading or listening to lewd books. This is indicative of an impure heart. "... for of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh" (Luke 6:45). And such language is able to stimulate yourself and others to commit fornication. "Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners" (1 Corinthians 15:33).

Unchaste lusts and thoughts are those which, upon arising at certain occasions, are retained and reflected upon. This also applies if a specific occasion is not the initial cause, but you stir up your own lusts by creating images in your fantasy, mentally reflect upon past fornication, or fantasize about given situations (of which one knows that they will not come to pass) in consequence of which fornication issues forth. "For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications" (Matthew 15:19); "The thoughts of the wicked are an abomination to the Lord" (Proverbs 15:26); "But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed" (James 1:14); "Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness" (Colossians 3:5). The opportunities for fornication are many. These opportunities partly present themselves and partly are sought for.

First of all there is dancing. Even though the dancer, while dancing, has all to do to heed the musical instrument and to watch his step, fornication is nevertheless stimulated by way of observation.

(1) Dancing has always been despised by the saints and held in contempt by civilized heathen.

(2) It neither proceeds from God nor is commanded anywhere; rather, it proceeds from the world and belongs to the lusts of the flesh and the lusts of the eyes (1 John 2:16), as well as to the unfruitful works of darkness (Ephesians 5:11).

(3) It cost John the Baptist his life (Matthew 14:6;Matthew 14:10), the daughters of Shiloh to be abducted (Judges 21:1-25), and Dinah to lose her honor (Genesis 34:1-2). I do not believe that a dancer would be willing to die and appear before the judgment seat while dancing.

Secondly, there is the involvement in, or watching of, comedy. If one were to remove from comedy the vain use of God‘s Name, pagan idolatry, the devil, abduction, rape, the manifestation of love between men and women, and foolish jesting, and would but display a historical event, then comedy would be no comedy. There would not be many who would watch it. However, those matters mentioned (and others of similar nature) provide the entertainment and it is therefore to be found in all comedies. This makes the heart exceptionally vain and fully occupies it, so that one reflects on this for days and nights. One imagines himself to be one of the players, or to be personally involved in a romance. This will ignite the lewdness which is hidden in the heart. One‘s attendance, therefore, is not for the purpose of approaching unto God, but to find delight in vain pleasure. God‘s judgment is not withheld from such, but He generally gives them over to themselves and to their vain and lewd heart. Occasionally He will punish some persons with insanity or even with death. We have experienced an example of this, that a person laughed himself to death at a comedy. No one will dare to say that comedies proceed from God, but one must rather acknowledge that they proceed from the world -- a world which a Christian must not love, for he who loves the world does not have the love of God in him (1 John 2:15), and is also deemed to be an enemy of God (James 4:4).

Thirdly, idleness has a great effect upon the heart and will stir it up to commit fornication; David experienced that (2 Samuel 11:1-27). The young widows who idly wander from house to house wax wanton, according to Paul (1 Timothy 5:11;1 Timothy 5:13). A pagan states: Remove idleness, and you will remove fornication.

Fourthly, there is rioting and drunkenness, to which the apostle adds wantonness. "Let us walk honestly, as in the day; not in rioting and drunkenness, not in chambering and wantonness" (Romans 13:13); "Look not thou upon the wine ... thine eyes shall behold strange women" (Proverbs 23:31;Proverbs 23:33).

Fifthly, there is social interaction with men and women who are inclined toward fornication. Being in wrong company will cause you to err. "He that walketh with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fools shall be destroyed" (Proverbs 13:20).

Sixthly, there is the viewing of lewd paintings. The heart will be moved by whatever the eye sees. The fornication of the women in Israel was stimulated and they were enamored by seeing the images of the Chaldean men (Ezekiel 23:13-16).

Seventhly, there are marriages between those who are unequal in years, the one spouse being old and the other young. The young spouse may readily acquire an aversion for the older spouse. If one then desists from the use of one‘s spouse, one will readily be enticed by unchaste lusts -- if not deeds.

Eighthly, there are domestic quarrels. Quarrels between husband and wife will cause them to be estranged from each other. This then prevents one from fulfilling the obligations which love requires, and thus one‘s corrupt nature will get the opportunity to manifest itself. The Abominable Nature of this Sin and the Special Judgments Which God Executes upon It

These are the main areas of sin, and hereby you will have to examine yourself as to how innocent or guilty you are. In order to deter everyone from this sin, we shall demonstrate its abominable nature and the special judgments which God brings upon man due to this sin.

First, consider this sin in all its abominableness.

(1) It is the captain of all sin and is listed first among all the works of the flesh. "Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness," etc. (Galatians 5:19-21). Yes, the man who is addicted to this sin loses his heart. "Whoredom and wine and new wine take away the heart" (Hosea 4:11). Such a person is vulnerable to all sin. "Abstain from fleshly lusts, which war against the soul" (1 Peter 2:11).

(2) It runs counter to the indwelling of the Holy Spirit who dwells in believers as in a temple. There He illuminates the heart, comforts, engenders prayer, answers prayers, and leads in the way of holiness. This sin, however, desecrates this temple. "Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you? If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are" (1 Corinthians 3:16-17); "Flee fornication ... he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost" (1 Corinthians 6:18-19).

(3) It runs counter to the suffering of Christ, who thereby has redeemed believers and made them His property. "Know ye not that your bodies are the members of Christ? shall I then take the members of Christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid. For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God‘s" (1 Corinthians 6:15;1 Corinthians 6:20).

(4) It runs counter to the heavenly calling whereby believers have been translated from the kingdom of Satan to the kingdom of Christ. "For God hath not called us unto uncleanness, but unto holiness" (1 Thessalonians 4:7).

(5) It is a dreadful act of contempt toward God and a provocation against Him. The presence of a person -- yes, even a child -- will prevent the commission of this sin due to being ashamed before him. Would not God‘s presence then arouse shame? Would one dare to commit this sin before the eyes and the countenance of a holy God?

Secondly, consider and take note of the special judgments which God sends upon fornicators.

(1) There is a giving over to self and to sin, whereby one will lapse into the commission of the abominable acts of uncleanness -- yes, even sodomy (Romans 1:27). One will be given over to spiritual adultery and idolatry and to a dying in sin. "But she that liveth in pleasure is dead while she liveth" (1 Timothy 5:6).

(2) God brings great wrath upon them according to body and soul. Let Sodom be an example to you, of which Peter says, "The Lord knoweth how ... to reserve the unjust unto the day of judgment to be punished: but chiefly them that walk after the flesh in the lust of uncleanness" (2 Peter 2:9-10). Consider also the example of the fornicating Israelites in the wilderness. "Neither let us commit fornication, as some of them committed, and fell in one day three and twenty thousand" (1 Corinthians 10:8); "... whoremongers and adulterers God will judge" (Hebrews 13:4).

(3) Many will be eternally damned because of this sin. "Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind ... shall inherit the kingdom of God" (1 Corinthians 6:9-10); "For this ye know, that no whoremonger, nor unclean person, ... hath any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God" (Ephesians 5:5); "But ... whoremongers ...shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death" (Revelation 21:8). The Virtues Enjoined

First, there must be in one‘s heart a hatred and aversion for, and hostility toward all uncleanness of heart and whatever issues forth therefrom. "Hate the evil" (Amos 5:15); "Abhor that which is evil" (Romans 12:9); "... hating even the garment spotted by the flesh" (Jude 1:23).

Secondly, one must endeavor to have a heart marked by modesty, purity, and shamefacedness. "... that we may lead a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and honesty" (1 Timothy 2:9); "A bishop then must be sober. Even so must their wives be ... sober, faithful in all things" (1 Timothy 3:2;1 Timothy 3:11); "He that hath ... a pure heart" (Psalms 24:4); "Blessed are the pure in heart" (Matthew 5:8); "... that women adorn themselves ... with shamefacedness and sobriety" (1 Timothy 2:9).

Thirdly, one must be chaste in all his actions -- also those that pertain to the body. "... that I may present you as a chaste virgin" (2 Corinthians 11:2); "Let us cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the flesh and spirit" (2 Corinthians 7:1); "... keep thyself pure" (1 Timothy 5:22).

Exhortation to Strive for Purity of Heart

Everyone ought to be on guard so that, consistent with the exhortation of the apostle, everyone may possess his vessel in sanctification and honor (1 Thessalonians 4:4).

(1) We must know that we have the enemy within ourselves, that we carry the seed of uncleanness within, which will very readily shoot up if we do not carefully watch against this. Happy is he who has a true heart of a virgin, for when this sin takes hold, it cannot very easily be driven out. Therefore, watch!

(2) Carefully avoid all occasions which would stimulate this sin -- be it via the eye or the ear. One must therefore watch very carefully over these two senses. "I made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maid" (Job 31:1).

(3) If an unclean motion arises in your heart, immediately shake it off as you would shake off fire from your clothes. Divert your thoughts immediately to something else. Here, fleeing is the best option. If, however, you do not reject the initial thought and you allow your thoughts but to reflect on it for a moment, you are conquered. This sin will flourish rapidly and will at once exercise great power.

(4) Be always engaged in honest activities. Even when you are free from obligations, do not let your flesh be idle. Arouse yourself to be engaged in your task with delight and earnestness, so that it may occupy your heart, and thus there will be neither room nor time for this filthiness.

(5) Be moderate in eating, drinking, and sleeping, for if there is a lack of moderation in these things, the body will be vulnerable for this sin and the lust for and yearning after this sin will arise that much easier.

(6) Avoid such people who are inclined toward this sin -- be it that they are giving license to the flesh or that they are battling this sin. There can very easily be a word or something else which ignites a virgin heart. Furthermore, this sin will take hold all the more readily if one also is battling against this sin himself.

(7) Arm yourself with fear for God‘s presence and omniscience. Pray continually: "Create in me a clean heart, O God." If it is common for this sin to frequently assault you, have days of fasting for this -- and the Lord will help the person who is engaged in this battle.

(8) Always consider the consequences of this sin. It yields but a brief delight for the flesh and a long and bitter aftertaste for the soul. And if this aftertaste presents itself as a lively reality for you, you will then be able to reject its brief delight that much easier.